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asleep sleeping
This guy could not have made it any easier for the police to bust him for driving while intoxicated. As reported by  The Hunterdon County Democrat (New Jersey):

The incident happened on Friday, July 18, just before midnight on Route 31 north near Echo Lane. Patrolman John Tiger saw a 2013 Ford Mustang stopped on the northbound shoulder with its hazard lights activated. Upon approaching the car, Tiger saw Rafael Genao, 35, of Washington sleeping in the driver’s seat while the engine was running, police said.

Genao’s right hand was on the gear shifter, the car was in neutral, and the emergency brake was on. When the officer woke Genao, Genao de-activated the emergency brake and the car rolled backward, hitting Tiger’s patrol vehicle, police said. After several attempts, Tiger was able to get Genao to park his vehicle, turn it off and hand over the keys, police said.

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elevator
If you live in Britain, you have to know that cameras are everywhere.  And yes, that includes elevators too. And seriously, you couldn’t wait another minute or two? Per The Daily Post:

A man who defecated in a lift is being hunted by police as part of a crackdown on “shameless” passengers who use North Wales train stations as toilets.

Yes, you read that right. And the CCTV video can be found at the link at the end of this post.

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ear
No doubt this gent would rather have his ear back. Unfortunately, that is not an option.  As reported by the Belleville News-Democrat (Illinois):

Roger W. Harris, 21, alleged in a federal lawsuit that guards at the jail should have done more to protect him from other inmates. On May 11, 2012, inmate Teryun D. Jackson bit off Harris’ ear and another inmate, Marlon K. Jackson, flushed the ear down a toilet.

Ouch! What was the end result?

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sold sign
You list a car on Craigslist, and get a check for almost twice the asking price. Are you suspicious? You should be. This scam has been around for a long time. As reported by The Times and Democrat (Orangeburg, South Carolina):

The victim said Thursday she listed her vehicle [on CraigsList] back in December. She said she was contacted online and via cell phone.

On Dec. 5, she received a check from someone in Cleveland for $2,200 for the vehicle. She was only asking $1,200, the report said.

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chuck e cheese
Chuck E. Cheese provides all kinds of services – food, entertainment, birthday parties. What they don’t do, though, is babysit. Per The Post and Courier (Charleston, South Carolina):

A woman on Friday dropped four children off at a West Ashley Chuck E. Cheese while she went shopping for an hour and a half, Charleston police alleged in a report.

Meriana Sanusi Martin, 47, of Wildwood Lane in Beaufort, is charged with four counts of cruelty to children in connection with the incident, the report said.

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It’s easy to play Monday-morning bird smuggler. But do you have any better ideas? From the L.A. Now blog (by Scott Glover) of the Los Angeles Times:

A man who allegedly flew from Vietnam to Los Angeles with 14 live birds hidden in his pants was one of two men indicted on smuggling-related charges today by a federal grand jury in Los Angeles.

Duc Le, 34, and Sony Dong, 46, are charged in an eight-count indictment with conspiring to smuggle dozens of birds into the United States, including red-whiskered bulbuls, magpie robins and shama thrushes.

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school bus
This kid is Trouble. That capital “T” is intentional. Why? Check out what this youngster has been up to, as reported by wmbb.com (Florida):

Police say that a 12-year-old charged in June with stealing a school bus and taking it on a joyride has done it again.

Yes, again!

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police sign
So nice of you to pull over here! As reported by The Williamson Daily News (Williamson, West Virginia):

Patsy L. Kidwell, 48, and Ransom Lee Endicott, 52, both of Delbarton, were arrested after officers allegedly received a call notifying them that two individuals were unconscious in the front seat of a white Chevrolet. The car was parked outside the state police Williamson detachment, within walking distance of Trooper First Class J.K. Harris, who saw both defendants, seemingly unconscious in the vehicle.

So it turns out it wasn’t such a good place to pull over.

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doctor medical
Anyone who expects doctors to be perfect is just being unreasonable. Like folks in all other lines of work, doctors make mistakes. But this is a mistake that should never happen, as The Juice is certain you will agree. As reported by The Philippine Star:

A 3-year-old girl [in Zamboanga City, Philippines], who was clinically pronounced dead woke on Sunday during her funeral service in a church in Aurora, Zamboanga del Sur, police said.

How could this happen?

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police car
The Juice believes in being totally honest when he gets pulled over. Recently, when an officer pulled him over and asked if he knew he was going 71 mph on a 50 mph road, he replied “only 71?” But seriously folks, as reported by news1130.com (Vancouver, BC):

Police are highlighting the seriousness of drunk and distracted driving by telling us about some of the silly excuses people give them while breaking the law.

The cops are hearing things like: “You are wasting your time, I have driven way more drunk than this!” and “If you impound my car I won’t be able to get to court tomorrow and it will be your fault.”