Articles Posted in Yikes

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ive been framed i've

Sorry pal. The defense of “I have no idea how those drugs got there!” is not available in this case. Why not? As reported in The West Briton:

When he [Jack Anthony Harvey, 42] was arrested at his home, drugs were found in Harvey’s house, car and taped to his testicles.

Yikes!

In total about 38g of heroin was seized, with a potential value of £3,800, and 26g of “unusually” pure cocaine hydrochloride, which Mr Lee said could have been worth up to £3,000 if it was cut to normal street purity.

In interview, Harvey said he had no recollection of any incident on the A390 and denied being intoxicated.

Mr Lee said: “He made allegations that police had planted the drugs in his car … of the drugs stuck to his testicles [he] denied any knowledge, commenting that some filthy woman must have put it there.”

Good luck with that one. You can read a lot more, and see a photo of Mr. Harvey, here.

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gta grand theft auto

This guy must have played Grand Theft Auto, because what he did could have come straight out of the game. As reported by kaj18.c0m (Montana):

The day-long crime spree happened on May 23, 2013.

And what a day it was.

It started around 7:55 a.m. when the Gallatin County Sheriff’s Office got a call that a vehicle had been stolen from Hulbert Road West, between Four Corners and Belgrade. The suspect was described as a man around 30 years old with shaggy collar-length blond hair, wearing jeans and a black shirt and appearing to have a leg injury. The caller said his wife saw the man approach the house, ring the doorbell then drive away in their 2006 blue Chevy Silverado, court papers state.

A deputy found the truck at around 8:36 a.m. on Rocky Mountain Road, but the driver fled, leading law enforcement on a high-speed chase that reached speeds of up to 100 miles per hour along gravel roads, court papers state.

[Matthew] Brandemihl [31] reportedly drove the vehicle into a ravine behind a residence on Sherman Drive then broke into the home, took a woman’s phone and four bottles of beer then drove her Ford Explorer through the closed garage door.

Montana Highway Patrol troopers began pursuing Brandemihl again. He led them through the county, driving 95 mph on Frontage Road toward Belgrade, then jumping the railroad tracks, driving through a fence on Interstate 90 where he drove the against traffic before crashing the stolen Explorer into a ditch near Business Hub Drive at around 9:30 a.m., court papers state.

Officers surrounded the area but then found that a resident in the area was missing a GMC truck.

At around 12:11 p.m., dispatchers received a call that the truck was spotted between Pony and Harrison. Law enforcement tracked Brandemihl onto Forest Service land near Pony on foot.

Several hours later, he came out of the woods and surrendered. He was taken to Bozeman Deaconess Hospital for a leg injury.

Are you dizzy too? The outcome?

Brandemihl … pleaded guilty to two felony counts of theft, one count of felony criminal endangerment and a misdemeanor charge of criminal trespass to property. In exchange, prosecutors dropped an additional felony charge of theft.

Next case … wait – not so fast.

Gallatin County District Court Judge Holly Brown initially told Brandemihl she would not accept his guilty plea because she wasn’t confident he understood what happened that day. This arose after he said he didn’t clearly remember where he was that day, or what his intentions were.

After sitting down with his attorney and discussing the matter, Brandemihl entered his guilty plea and admitted to the judge he stole three different vehicles, drove erratically, entered a home, took beer and led police on a high-speed chase.

Brandemihl will be sentenced on Feb. 25.

Done. Here’s the source, including a photo of Mr. Brandemihl.

 

 

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door bell doorbell ding dong ditch

There can’t be many boys out there who never played “doorbell ditch.” A few Missouri boys have definitely played this game out. In fact, they may never ring ANY doorbell again. As reported by The News-Leader (news-leader.com:

Police say the boys angered the female resident to the point that she tried to run one down with her van, punched another three times while holding a knife to his chest and threatened to kill the boys and others, all while shouting racial slurs.

Ashley D. Crossland followed one boy to the house where the boys were having a sleepover, police say, and illegally entered the home. Confronted by a father of one of the boys, Crossland allegedly “threatened to slit his throat and everyone’s throats in the house, including the babies.”

You can read a lot more, and see the perp’s mug shot here.

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piranha

How much do you think a piranha is worth? More on that later. For now, you only need to know that, if you live in New York City, you can’t have a piranha.  But just because it’s illegal … As reported by nbcnewyork.com:

A New York City man is accused of smuggling nearly 40,000 piranhas into the U.S. by having them mislabeled as harmless aquarium fish, prosecutors said.

First reaction: run!

[Joel Rakower] began importing the mislabeled fish in 2011, shortly after New York City prohibited possession of piranhas, and continued through 2012, prosecutors said.

In all, he smuggled 39,548 piranhas, worth $37,376, that were then sold to fish retailers throughout the U.S.

So a piranha is worth less than $1? Go figure.

Joel Rakower and his fish distribution company pleaded guilty Wednesday and agreed to pay more than $70,000 in fines and restitution.

Authorities said Rakower admitted buying the aggressive fish from a Hong Kong supplier that he instructed to falsely label the shipments as silver tetras, a more common household fish.

As for the legality of owning piranhas outside of NYC:

Twenty-five states either ban or regulate piranhas, which could pose a serious risk to ecosystems if they got into native waters.

What about the serious risk to swimmers? Or has The Juice seen too many movies with piranha scenes? Anyway, you’ll find the source here.

 

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swiss cheese

The Juice has come across some strange fetishes in his thousands of posts over the years. This may be the strangest yet, as reported by The Philadelphia Inquirer.

The Mayfair Town Watch reported yesterday on its Facebook page that the “Swiss Cheese Pervert” has been terrorizing neighborhood women.

Yes, you read that correctly.

According to the group, the suspect, a heavyset white man estimated to be in his late 40s or early 50s, approaches women while driving a silver or black sedan with his genitals exposed. He then displays a piece of sliced Swiss cheese and offers to pay the women to put the cheese on his penis and perform sexual acts on him using it.

All together now: Ewwwwww!

“I understand that people may think this is funny, but this is no laughing matter,” said Milt Martelack, the town watch’s senior adviser. “We’ve had a couple individuals reach out to us. We’re taking this matter very seriously, and we’re working vigorously with police to get this guy off the streets.”

A police source yesterday confirmed that the Special Victims Unit is investigating the man after several women from the Mayfair area filed reports describing similar encounters with a man displaying what the source called a “major sexual cheese fetish.”

Hmmm. This sounds familiar …

And although news of the bizarre case shocked many Mayfair residents, Gabby Chest – who lives in nearby Bridesburg – recognized the behavioral pattern instantly.

In July 2012, Chest, then 19 and having just broken up with her boyfriend, created a profile on the dating website OkCupid.

Within days, she said, she was contacted by a “really strange guy,” who sent her a private message that detailed a very specific request.

“He said he was looking for someone to perform masturbation on him with cheese,” Chest said. “He kept saying how strong his urges were and how desperate he was to find someone to help him with them.”

An excerpt from that message, which Chest sent the Daily News, details the origin of the man’s self-described “fetish.”

“I started to compare girls to cheese due to their milky complections [sic], girls are soft, smooth feeling and tend to like dairy products more,” he wrote.

“That and typical advertising, always using a girl to advertise dairy products. So cheese is what I started to use as a replacement for having sex with girls.”

It’s not surprising, then, that Chest recognized the man who had contacted her as the “Swiss Cheese Pervert” as soon as she saw his picture on the Mayfair Town Watch’s Facebook page.

“There’s no doubt it was him; it looked exactly like the picture on his profile,” she said. “I was scared and shocked. I never thought the guys you see on those sites would be so close to me.”

Yikes. You can read more here.  (The haven’t caught him yet.)

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step out

People react in many different ways when they suspect their spouse is cheating. Some folks get sad, and some get mad. Here’s mad, via The Gainesville Sun:

Officials said Tara Johnson, 41, of 419 Squire Drive, and her husband have been married for about three years and living together for approximately five years. Johnson told deputies she drove to her husband’s workplace at Cox Communications on Northwest 43rd Street around 6:30 a.m. to question why he had not returned home, an Alachua County Sheriff’s Office report said.

Ms. Johnson thinks she knows why.

Johnson said she saw him get out of another car with a woman she recognized as his ex-girlfriend. Johnson told deputies she became angry and drove her car forward, blocking the exit of the ex-girlfriend to stop her from leaving, the report said.

Uh-oh.

Johnson and her husband soon began arguing, and then deputies said she drove her car forward and hit her husband, bumping him into the air. The man fell to the ground, and Johnson then retrieved a baseball bat from her car and began chasing him around the car with it, the report said.

After chasing her husband, Johnson got back into her car and drove away. Her husband suffered hip pain and was taken to UF Health Shands Hospital, Gainesville Police Department Officer Ben Tobias said.

Whew. That could have ended a lot worse. As for Ms. Johnson:

She later was arrested by deputies at her home, the report said… [and] … was charged with aggravated assault and aggravated battery.

You’ll find the source here, with a mug shot.

 

 

 

 

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airplane bathroom

Planes make emergency landings for a variety of reasons. Here’s a new one to add to the list, as reported by The Moscow Times:

A criminal case on charges of hooliganism has been opened against the former deputy governor of the Chelyabinsk region on charges of hooliganism for beginning a fistfight with a flight attendant.

A Moscow-bound plane had to make an emergency landing in Novosibirsk on Sunday after Andrei Tretyakov, allegedly drunk, beat up a flight attendant in a dispute over the toilet, a police spokesman said.

Yes, it was all about a dispute over a toilet.

“The man was an economy class passenger and tried to use a business class toilet, which is against the rules. He had a spat with a flight attendant and punched him seven or ten times,” a Siberian transport police spokesman said.

And who was this man?

The former governor, aged 45, was already drunk when he boarded Globus airline’s Moscow-bound plane in the Siberian city of Krasnoyarsk on Sunday night, police said.

Tretaykov was dismissed from his position in the Chelyabinsk region in 2011 and currently says he is an external advisor to the Natural Resources Ministry, Interfax reported. He was also the acting head of the state geology holding company Rosgeology from May 2012 to June 2013.

Think he was fun to work for? And what about the poor flight attendant?

… [he] was hospitalized and diagnosed with a head injury and bruises.

The governor?

Tretyakov was detained and taken to a Novosibirsk police department.

Convictions for hooliganism can carry up to a five-year prison term, though the average fine for unruly in-flight conduct in Russia is 5,000 rubles ($150).

The plane?

The plane was refueled and took off about two hours later.

You’ll find the source here.

 

 

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white castle

Clearly he didn’t go about it the right way, and not to disparage White Castle, but having had their burgers, The Juice can testify that they would definitely go down better with beer, or any other alcoholic beverage. As reported by riverfronttimes.com (St. Louis, Missouri):

A White Castle customer was so upset he couldn’t wash his sliders down with an ice cold beer that he stabbed another customer in the head, police say.

The knife-wielding craver was trying to BYOB around 3:50 a.m. Tuesday at the downtown White Castle on South Broadway near Busch Stadium when an employee asked him to leave. A 57-year-old customer came to the employee’s defense, and the suspect stabbed him once in the head.

So what happened after that? Dude got away.

St. Louis Police are looking for the man, described as black, 40 to 50 years old, under six feet and 180 pounds. The victim’s injuries were minor.

Here’s the source.

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shopping shop shoppers

Although most folks go to the store to shop, this gent had something else in mind. He apparently also isn’t aware of this “new” tool stores use called “security videos.” As reported by clickorlando.com (wkmg):

From the start of the security video, it is obvious the man on the video does not want to get caught doing something very wrong. He is seen looking around, lowering his hand and then hiding behind a rack of clothes.

A woman walks past, unaware of what he was doing. Then, he steps into view of the camera, and it becomes obvious what was going on.

Police arrested Dwight Eddington for indecent exposure after the store security guard told authorities the suspect “appeared to have been following a customer inside the store” while touching himself.

Other shoppers wondered if anyone noticed what he was up to, but said the act is “pretty disgusting.”

Hey, these are just allegations, and, er, videos. Surely there could be an innocent explanation.

Eddington had nothing to say to Local 6 when we found him at home, but to police, he denied touching himself and said he “had an itch and had to expose himself in order to scratch.”

Alrighty then. And that’s not the only legal matter Mr. Eddington is dealing with.

Police arrested Eddington in October for allegedly strangling someone in a domestic violence case.

Here’s the source, including a video of the story.

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tacos

A guy walks into a Mexican restaurant with a sword (this is not the beginning of a joke). Seriously, a guy walked into a Mexican restaurant in San Antonio with a sword, as reported by The Houston Chronicle (chron.com).

[Adam] Kramer [age 28] ordered six tacos at Alondras De Jalisco on South Loop 1604 at about 2:30 p.m. on Dec. 2, according to documents released Friday. When the waitress told Kramer how much he owed, he responded that he was going to take them for free, officials said.

When the waitress told Kramer that he had to pay for his food, he allegedly started sliding what is described as a large sword in and out of a black sheath on his waist, the affidavit says.

That’s nice, sweetie, but that’ll be …

The waitress asked the cook to come talk with Kramer, who left the building when the phone rang, according to the affidavit. Kramer went to his vehicle before walking back to the restaurant, still allegedly carrying the large sword, so the waitress locked the door, documents state.

“Mr. Kramer was yelling that he wanted his free tacos or somebody was going to die,” the affidavit says.

Yes, it sounds made up, just like so many of The Juice’s posts. But it’s true.

Kramer eventually drove out of the parking lot in a black Toyota truck, according to authorities. He was picked up by Bexar County Sheriff’s Office deputies the next day on a separate charge of aggravated assault with a deadly weapon.

The waitress was able to pick out Kramer’s photograph from a lineup and also identified the sword, documents state.

Kramer is also facing a third charge, for attempted robbery, according to records.

If you’re wondering what Mr. Kramer is up to now …

… [he] remains in the Bexar County Jail with a bail amount of $50,000.

Here’s the source, including a mug shot of Mr. Kramer.