Squeezed on:

true truth

The Juice is not making this up. As reported by The Gainesville Sun:

An Orlando man was arrested in Gainesville Sunday afternoon after another man said he tried to rape him and steal the money he had just withdrawn from a credit union.

The suspect’s name?

Phuc Kieu.

Truth. You can read more, and see the mug shot, here.

 

Squeezed on:

sleep sleeping asleep

It can’t be said with certainty what this woman was up to, but … As reported by brooklynpaper.com, from the 76th Precinct (Carroll Gardens-Cobble Hill–Red Hook):

Cops cuffed a woman who they say was sleeping in an apartment building stairway with a knife, pills, and some tools on her person on Bond Street on Dec. 3. Officers stated they found the 47-year-old woman passed out on the staircase in the complex near and Hoyt Street at 5:25 am.

When she awoke, they noticed that she had a knife on her belt and a few loose pills out in the open, cops said. Further inspection revealed a pry bar and wire cutters, according to a police report.

Hmm. A pry bar. Wire cutters …

Posted in: Best Of
Squeezed on:
Updated:
Squeezed on:

OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

For offenses involving socks, two British men were sentenced to 18 months in jail (for “conspiring to commit acts of gross indecency”), and put on the sex offenders’ registry for 10 years.  Per The Southport Visiter:

Two men swindled hundreds of people in Southport out of their socks back in the 1990s.

How do you “swindle” folks out of socks?

Claiming to be collecting the socks for good causes, the men approached unsuspecting victims in the resort’s bars and clubs and paid revellers up to £5 for their footwear.

Creepy.

They made sure to take pictures of the victims with their socks and then meticulously tagged each pair with the donor’s name before wrapping them in sandwich bags.

Creepier. Guess what the police found at one of the dude’s flat?

… 4,000 pairs in binbags in a cupboard. Officers described their astonishment when they found they had to wade through an 18 inch deep “carpet” of smelly socks. “They were everywhere and anywhere,” an officer said.

“They were all over the furniture, hanging from lampshades and even in the microwave, frying pan and cooker.”

“It was like there had been an explosion in a sock factory and socks had blown all over the place. In my 25 years with the police I have never seen anything like it.”

Yikes.

Squeezed on:

dice gambling rolling

Unless you have a gambling problem, you’ll usually play with what you are prepared to lose. No way were these gents prepared to lose what they did. As reported by The Arab Times:

The Ahmadi police have arrested 12 Asians [in Kuwait City] for gambling in an open area at an unidentified location, reports Al-Watan Arabic daily. They have been referred to the concerned authorities to prepare their deportation.

Now that is some high stakes gambling.

Squeezed on:

car dealer dealership

“Of all the car dealers in all the towns in all the world, he walks into this one.” (If you don’t recognize this paraphrased quote, see #67.) As reported by Will Greenlee at tcpalm.com

A man accused of running around a car dealership with balloons after downing a bottle of booze and possibly chasing people with a machete was arrested, according to statements in a recently released arrest affidavit.

Yikes. You can read more, and see the gent’s mug shot, here.

Posted in: Yikes
Squeezed on:
Updated:
Squeezed on:

happy birthday

To some folks birthdays are just another day. To others, they are a really big deal. This gent is definitely in the latter group.  As reported by The Gainesville Sun:

James E. Irving Jr., 44, got into a fight with his live-in girlfriend over his birthday present and preferred celebratory breakfast, according to a Gainesville Police Department booking report and information provided by GPD spokesman Officer Ben Tobias. Irving wanted pancakes and instead got waffles.

Oh no you didn’t just serve me waffles!

To express his disdain, Irving poked his girlfriend in the eye, which prompted a call to the Police Department, the report states. Irving was handcuffed and taken to the Alachua County jail on a misdemeanor battery charge.

In case you’re wondering …

On Monday morning, jail staff served inmates a breakfast of fruit, grits, sausage, bread and butter, according to Sgt. Becky Butscher, an Alachua County sheriff’s spokeswoman.

You’ll find the source, including a mug shot, here.

Squeezed on:

drunk drink glass martini

We’ve all been there. You drink to much, and you do something stupid. Usually though, not this stupid.  As reported in the Colorado Springs Police Department’s blotter:

Incident Date: November 15, 2014

Colorado Springs police received a 911 call shortly before 9 p.m. reporting that gunshots could be heard coming from inside a home on the 1200 block of Royale Drive. As officers arrived at the home described by the reporting party, they saw its front door open. At that time they heard numerous gunshots being fired from inside the home. Reacting immediately, officers moved inside the home, toward the sound of the gunshots. The officers contacted three people inside the residence. Further investigation into the incident revealed that the homeowner, and a friend, decided to alternate using a handgun to shoot glass bottles in the basement of the residence, while the third person watched. Both the homeowner and the friend were under the influence of alcohol at the time of the incident. 28 year-old Christian Clark and 23 year-old Codie Leslie were charged with Prohibited use of weapons and Reckless Endangerment.

Brilliant!

Posted in: Bam! and Yikes
Squeezed on:
Updated:
Squeezed on:

mug shot

People often don’t show up for their court appearances. But don’t go giving this woman (yes, that’s her above) any props just yet. Per The South Jersey Times via nj.com:

A Lindenwold woman who was in court for driving with a suspended license allegedly left after being heard for multiple traffic offenses, hopped in her car and drove off, borough police said.

So obviously the judge reinstated her license? Well, not exactly.

At the conclusion of her hearing in Berlin Municipal Court on Wednesday, Tammy M. Coppoletta allegedly got in the driver’s seat of her vehicle and drove away. She was soon pulled over for driving with a suspended license, police said.

Coppoletta reportedly had more than $4,000 in active warrants and was in possession of prescription drugs that were not prescribed to her, police said.

Double whammy. Back to court you go.

She was brought back in front of the judge, who sent her to Camden County Jail for 20 days. An additional charge for possession of a controlled dangerous substance was lodged against her, with an additional bail amount of $5,000 being set.

You know the old saying, at least as told by former President Bush, “… fool me once, shame on – shame on you. Fool me – you can’t get fooled again.” Any way, you get the idea. Here’s the source.

Squeezed on:

cell phone mobile selfie

A New Zealand doctor took a number of photographs of his … genitalia, with his cell phone. You might ask, “Why?” According to the judge, the reasons “still remain largely inexplicable.” Our doctor, whose name the court has not released, tried to send the photos to a female friend with the caption “before.” (I don’t think we’ll ever know what “after” would have been.) Well, the e-mail address was incorrect, so it bounced back. When the doctor tried to delete the photos, he caused them to be archived!

Another sexually explicit e-mail the doctor sent led to the discovery of the “self-portrait.” An Employment Court proceeding followed and, as they say in New Zealand, the doctor was sacked. He appealed. How do you think he fared?

He won! The appellate court held that the dismissal process was flawed and that the dismissal was unjustified.