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You rob a bank and you get away. Of course you wouldn’t go to any of your known haunts, or … would you? As reported by NJ Advance Media for NJ.com:

Within hours of publicizing photos from bank surveillance after a TD Bank robbery, more than a dozen tipsters recognized a 30-year-old Lakehurst man and contacted the police.

So they id’d him, but where was he? Funny you should ask …

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Maybe this guy’s intentions were good, or maybe he saw what he thought was an opportunity to shoot his gun. Regardless, he is now officially in the soup.  As reported by wdrb.com (Louisville, Kentucky):

It happened in the parking lot of the Kmart on Outer Loop, near New Cut Road, just before 8 p.m. Thursday.

According to an arrest report, police were called to the area after someone reported a shooting. When they arrived, they met with 24-year-old Robert J. Jones, the man police say fired the gun.

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People do the darndest things when they’re plastered. Example number 12,434, 523 comes to you from The Northwest Florida Daily News:

The call [from 55-year-old Fort Walton Beach man] came in to Okaloosa County Sheriff’s Office E911 system at 12:19 a.m. on June 24, according to the arrest report. He said “Send coroner, I just killed myself.”

Fort Walton Beach Police officers were dispatched to his home, because it was in the city, the report said. They found that he didn’t not have an emergency and “was only highly intoxicated.”

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Getting pocket dialed is annoying, though we all get tagged occasionally, even the police. In this particular instance, The Juice is guessing they weren’t the least bit annoyed.

Police responded to a 911 call in the 600 block of S.W. 122nd street. The caller was on a cell phone and accidentally dialed 911. When no one responded on the line, the dispatcher became concerned. They were able to trace the call and locate the cell phone in an abandoned house. Officers arrived and found three subjects had broken in to a rear door of the home and were inside illegally.

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A certain gentleman (not the guy in picture) will be cursing child safety locks in cars for quite some time. Why? As reported by nola.com (The Times-Picayune):

A man accused of stealing more than $20,000 in cash after burglarizing a Metairie coffee shop might have gotten away if it wasn’t for a pesky child-safety door lock, according to authorities. The driver of a Jeep Grand Cherokee pulled over by Deputy Michal Voltolina during the early morning hours of July 4th bolted from the vehicle after a brief chase, according to Col. John Fortunato, spokesman for the Jefferson Parish Sheriff’s Office.

But Brent Prince, 22, of Metairie, found himself in handcuffs after becoming trapped inside the Jeep by the vehicle’s safety locks.

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Yes, incredibly, this is a real story. As reported by myfoxdetroit.com:

Three Bloomfield Hills kids who refused an order by a judge to go to lunch with their father have been ordered to a juvenile detention facility.

“I felt like I was watching them be executed,” said Maya Tsimhoni.

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Who would think of “rock, paper, scissors” as a gambling game? A Seattle man did (it’s unlikely he will again, at least for a while), and was looking for takers. He found one, and it didn’t end well. As reported by komonews.com:

King County prosecutors claim Michael Langley stabbed at another man after his friend lost a $1 bet on a street corner rock-paper-scissors match. Langley, 36, has been charged with second-degree assault in the June 29 incident.

Prior to the incident, the alleged victim had been soliciting rock-paper-scissors opponents near the intersection of Broadway and East Pike Street in Seattle’s Capitol Hill neighborhood.

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I’m not drunk! I know where I live! It’s No. 10 right there. Well, not exactly. As reported in The Moultrie News Police Blotter:

A drunk guy got a ride home one night to his apartment and told the driver he lived in apartment No. 10, according to a report.

He got a ride home! Excellent.

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This fellow was indeed born free and naked, but he’s in the slammer now (and clothed). He’s fortunate not to have been held in contempt. Perhaps the judge liked his singing. As reported by The Irish Times:

A 49-year-old man from Youghal in Co Cork, who constantly sang ‘Born Free’ when he appeared in court in Derry on Monday, has been remanded in custody.

Nicholas Roper was arrested in in Altnagelvin Hospital on Saturday night and charged with disorderly behaviour in the hospital’s accident and emergency department.

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Lots of people drink too much. Some people go on crime sprees. Not too many people do both simultaneously. Added to the list – a gent from from Wasilla, Alaska. Per The Alaska Dispatch News:

A 27-year-old Fairbanks man faces multiple charges after he robbed a Wasilla coffee stand, pulled a gun on another man, fled from authorities at high speed and drunkenly exposed himself along the Parks Highway, Alaska State Troopers say.

In an online dispatch, troopers wrote that a woman called authorities after she arrived at work around 5:15 a.m. Thursday at the coffee stand, on the Parks Highway at Vine Road. She found a man stealing money and other items from the stand, troopers said.