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So the United States already incarcerates a LOT of people. Imagine, if you will, that getting drunk in your own home, and having a party, were against the law. As reported by Al-Watan Arabic Daily (via The Arab Times):

Party holder held: Based on a tip-off, police rushed to an apartment in Hawalli and arrested an individual for consuming alcohol and holding fun party inside his apartment.

A police source said the drunkard had invited several friends to celebrate his birthday and got angry when he saw an invitee kissing and hugging his girlfriend. The drunkard became enraged and started shouting, as he ran after his girlfriend and the guest. Neighbors, who were being disturbed, called police and the drunkard was arrested, high on alcohol.

That’s right, we tried that once…

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While there is never a good time to be involved in a car accident, as will be made abundantly clear, some times are definitely worse than others. As reported at nj.com:

A 2002 white Mercury Mountaineer rolled over into the center grass median and struck the guardrail on July 29, with police and emergency workers responding around 12:56 p.m. Driver Paulette Murray, 48, of Brooklyn, N.Y., told police she failed to control the SUV after another car cut her off, authorities said.

Yikes, a roll over.

Items that had been inside the car before the accident were scattered at the scene, and the package of marijuana, police said, was lying where EMS and troopers were walking around.

Marijuana? How much marijuana?

At the scene, troopers said they observed [passenger] Douglas-Dawkins attempting to cover a damaged cardboard box with a blanket. The box contained a large package of marijuana with fabric softener inside to mask the smell, State Police said.

A large package you say. How large? 57 pounds large! Like The Juice said, not the best time to have an accident. You can read more, and see photos of the SUV and the scene here.

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Clearly this guy does not live by the Golden Rule: Do unto others as you would have them to unto you. There’s no way he would want anyone to treat him the way he treated this poor old man. As reported by The Gainesville Sun:

The maintenance man at a Gainesville apartment complex has been arrested after police allege he found a tenant either dead or dying and, before calling 911, used the man’s ATM card to withdraw more than $600.

So the man may have died while this dude was out using his ATM card. It doesn’t get a whole lot colder than that.

Police did not learn of the theft until three weeks after the man’s death on July 1, when the tenant’s brother called to say that on the day of his brother’s death, ATM charges were posted against his Bank of America account minutes before paramedics arrived.

Clarence Davis, 52, of 106 NE Rally Ave. in Micanopy, called authorities on July 1 to report a death at the University Commons apartment complex on Southwest Archer Road, the Gainesville Police Department reported. Shortly after police arrived, emergency medical personnel pronounced J.W. White dead of an undisclosed medical condition, police said.

And just in case you’re not convinced by this damning circumstantial evidence …

Video footage from the ATM showed Davis conducting a balance inquiry and making two withdrawals from the victim’s account for a total of $611.90 including transaction fees, police reported.

Yes, cold and clueless.

Only after returning from the ATM did Davis call 911 to report White as possibly dead and request medical assistance, police said.

Yup. That was one well thought out and well executed plan. As for Mr. Davis’s defense …

During an interview with police investigators Monday, Davis said he had permission to remove the money from White’s account to pay his rent and other bills, police reported. Davis then admitted to keeping the victim’s money rather than using it to pay rent, saying he used the money to restore the apartment so it could be re-rented, officers said.

Good luck with that one. You can read more, and see the mug shot, here.

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After getting sentenced to 10 years for robbery, like Mr. Taylor, I’m sure you wouldn’t be in the best mood either. Still, you better be prepared to pay the price if you lay into the judge, as Mr. Taylor did. Here are excerpts from the decision by the Superior Court of New Jersey, Appellate Division:

Defendant appeals from his conviction for second-degree robbery … his sentence on that charge, and the imposition of two consecutive six-month sentences for contempt …

Did someone say “contempt”?

When the court asked defendant if he understood his appeal rights, defendant responded by stating, “Yeah, I understand that you all railroaded the shit out of me. That’s what I understand.”

Uh-oh.

Although his attorney attempted to calm him down and the court attempted to resume asking him if he understood his right to appeal, defendant persisted in confrontational behavior, stating, “you’re all — so full of shit.” The court warned defendant that he would impose an additional six months for contempt of court. Defendant was defiant, stating, “Add six. What the fuck I care now.”

This reminds The Juice of a truly classic, early Juice post …

The court warned defendant again about imposing six months for contempt. Defendant replied, and repeated, “Fuck contempt of court.” Both his attorney and a court officer attempted to calm defendant down. The court said, “I’m going to give you one opportunity —” but defendant interrupted, “Give me — give me — don’t give me shit, mother fucker. Do what the fuck you’ve been doing to every black mother fucker that come in this courtroom.”

Defendant continued to interrupt the court, repeating, “Fuck you” three times, calling the judge a “crazy ass mother fucker,” telling him, “Eat shit and bark at the moon, sorry son of a bitch.” When the judge said he was going to place on the record his reasons for imposing an additional six month sentence, defendant interrupted again, stating “[i]s that all you’re going to put on it, the six months?” He continued to interrupt and taunt the court, saying, “Keep adding six months then” and “well shut the fuck up and do . . . what you’re going to do.”

Yikes.

The court proceeded to set forth the acts it deemed contumacious as the basis for imposing an additional sentence of six months. Defendant continued to interrupt. The court noted further that this exchange occurred in a courtroom filled with fifty people.

After the court ordered defendant to be remanded, defendant replied, “Fuck you, bitch” and then stated “Suck my ass, you cracker bitch.” The court had him returned to counsel table and imposed an additional six months for contempt, to be served consecutive to the prior sentences. After remanding defendant once again, the court noted that defendant “held up his left hand with the middle finger extended in a gesture[.]”

So how do you think the appellate court ruled? Affirmed. The case is STATE v. TAYLOR, No. A-3326-09T2, Superior Court of New Jersey, Appellate Division. (August 24, 2011). You can read the opinion on Leagle here.

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Sadly, lots of shoplifters use their kids during the perpetration of their crimes. But this lady, she’s in a whole ‘nother category. Per The Belleville News Democrat (Illinois):

Mykala M. Bator was charged by St. Clair County prosecutors Saturday with felony retail theft over $300, felony possession of a controlled substance and a misdemeanor charge of endangering a child. She is accused of shoplifting from Kohl’s around 4:55 p.m.

And if you’re wondering how she endangered the child …

According to the police report, a loss-prevention officer at Kohl’s confronted Bator outside the store on suspicion of shoplifting merchandise. She had a 1-year-old infant with her during the incident and when confronted, she ran to a waiting vehicle, tossed the child into the back seat of the car through an open window, and fled the scene as a passenger in the car.

Yes, the lady threw her one-year-old child through an open window. The kid could have suffered a brain injury. The Juice is angry.

Luckily … The child was not injured, according to Fairview Heights Police Lt. Steve Evans.

Whew. You’ll find the source here and a mug shot here.

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Police officers occasionally exercise bad judgment, just like everyone else. But this? Whoa. As reported by clickOrlando.com (WKMG – Local 6):

A Daytona Beach Police Sergeant has resigned after admitting to posting nude pictures of herself online while on-duty.

Lots and lots of nude pictures.

Sgt. Penny Dane has been in law enforcement for approximately 18 years and has been a sergeant with Daytona Beach police for the past four years.

According to an internal affairs investigation, Sgt. Dane admitted she accessed and sent sexually explicit pictures as part of an online game called “Red Light Center.” The game is likened to a virtual sex club and resembles Amsterdam’s Red Light district.

You can read a lot more, and see a video news story about this, here.

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You won’t believe what this guy had in his luggage. As reported by The Arab Times:

The customs officers at Cairo International Airport hampered the attempt of an Egyptian passenger to smuggle three foxes, three snakes, 100 one-month old crocodiles and 1,000 frozen white rats to Kuwait, reports Al-Seyassah daily. Based on information published by the new agencies in Cairo, the suspect was attempting to smuggle the animals through the ‘Egyptian Air’ flight to Kuwait.

Whoa! Must have been a rather large suitcase. So then what?

When the customs officers at the Baggage Check area were checking the luggage of the passengers, they suspected the contents of the Egyptian’s luggage and opened it to find the animals. However, the suspect managed to travel by the same flight after he signed an acknowledgment of his smuggle attempt and decided to relinquish the animals.

Talk about luck. It’s unlikely the Kuwaiti authorities would have been so lenient.

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Yeah, firing a bottle rocket out of your butt is never a good idea. And it’s even worse if it fails to launch! From the recently filed West Virginia case of Helmburg v. The Alpha Tau Omega Fraternity and Travis Hughes:

Defendant Hughes was highly intoxicated … and decided in his drunken stupor that it would be a good idea to shoot a bottle rocket out of his anus on the ATO deck …

Plaintiff and his girlfriend were also present on the ATO deck.

Defendant Hughes placed a bottle rocket in his anus, ignited the fuse, but instead of launching, the bottle rock blew up in Defendant’s rectum, and this startled plaintiff and caused him to jump back, at which time he fell off of the ATO deck, and he became lodged between the deck and an air conditioner unit adjacent to the deck.

So, you might be wondering, what legal duties does the plaintiff allege were breached by ATO?

ATO owed plaintiff a duty … to supervise its guests and its own fraternity members, such as Defendant Hughes, and other under age persons, from consuming alcohol on its premises, which leads to stupid and dangerous activities, such as shooting bottle rockets out of one’s own anus.

What about Mr. Hughes?

Defendant Hughes also owed plaintiff and others on the ATO deck a duty of care not to drink under age, or to file bottle rockets out of his anus.

And here’s a count for both defendants:

Plaintiff asserts that the activity of underage drinking and firing bottle rockets out of one’s own anus constitutes an “ultra-hazardous” activity which exposes both of these defendants to strict liability.

A painful night, all around.

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As a parent, you want to make sure your kids can handle themselves when they are on their own. This is not how you do it. As reported by swflcrimestoppers.org:

Southwest FloridaCrime Stoppers is asking for the public’s help identifying two women who utilized the innocence of several young children to commit a felony crime earlier this week.

According to deputies, two adult females, and five young children, entered the Gymboree store at 20350 Summerlin Road, Fort Myers, on Tuesday evening, July 23, to go shopping. When they approached the check out counter, another female was there speaking with one of the employees. When the suspect became engaged in that conversation, one of the children swiped the victims wallet, which was left on the counter. Once the stolen wallet was in hand, the troupe quickly exited the store and left in a white colored vehicle. The victim’s phone was also taken, but was found shortly thereafter along the roadside near Tanger Outlets.

And if you’re thinking that the adults aren’t that sharp, well …

Within an hour, credit cards left in the wallet were used twice at Pier One Imports for charges of more than $200, as well as the Foot Locker at the Edison Mall, charging up two initial fraudulent purchases for roughly $400. When the suspect and her children, ranging in age from 5-12, returned to make a third purchase for approximately $600 in shoes, the card was declined, as the victim had reported her credit cards as being stolen.

… You would be right.

As a result of a barrage of Crime Stoppers tips received today, the primary suspect in this case has been positively identified as Shanice Stewart, DOB 2/13/88. She now faces charges of felony grand theft and possible other charges. Stewart is a registered convicted felon with an extensive rap sheet, dating back to her first felony for grand theft auto at age 14. Since then she’s been jailed in Lee County for a long list of charges including burglary, aggravated assault, robbery, dealing in stolen property, multiple counts of theft, among other charges. Stewart has also spent jail time in both Collier and Manatee Counties.

You’ll find the source, and a mug shot, here.

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Everyone has heard a dog referred to as “man’s best friend.” This lady sure treated her “best friend” very, very badly. And the kind person who tried to intervene didn’t fare too well either. As reported by The Hamilton Spectator (Ontario):

Police were called to the area of King Street East and Proctor Boulevard around 3:30 p.m. Monday for reports of a woman punching her dog and dragging it by the leash. Callers said the dog was injured and bleeding.

You punched a dog? How can someone do that? But wait – there’s more.

A woman who witnessed the alleged assault on the dog confronted the owner about what she was doing. The Good Samaritan was then punched in the face by the suspect.

You punched the woman who tried to stop you from punching your dog? This woman has some serious anger issues. Hey Lady, The Juice suggests that you get a punching bag (an actual punching bag), and some therapy!

Police found the suspect and the injured dog at home. The one-year-old brown pup named Magnum was given to the SPCA.

A 23-year-old woman was arrested and charged with cruelty to animals and assault. Police have not released her name. She was released on a promise to appear.

Not cool at all. Here’s the source.