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This Florida woman has never been luckier. Actually, her estranged husband was lucky too. What is The Juice talking about? Check this out, from the Hillsborough County [Florida] Sheriff’s Office:

On May 19, 2013 at approximately 1:27 a.m., the defendant, Julio Villanueva-Vasquez used a tool to puncture the tires of a friend who was visiting the defendant’s estranged wife. The defendant then went to the main entry of the residence and used a tool to attempt to pry the door open. The victim heard strange noises at the door and observed the defendant through the window crouched down. The victim opened the door to take a picture as proof of the defendant being there. The defendant rushed in uninvited.

Here’s where the luck comes in.

The defendant and the victim engaged in a physical struggle before the defendant pulled a semi-auto handgun from his waist area. He then pulled the trigger after pointing the gun at the victim’s chest. The gun did not fire so he racked the slide twice and fired twice more, but the gun malfunctioned. The defendant fled on foot.

Three misfires? That’s some serious luck.

The victim sustained a small laceration to the face. She positively identified Villanueva-Vasquez as her attacker. A domestic violence injunction was in effect against the defendant. He was located at his residence and arrested without incident.

You’ll find the source, including a mug shot, here.

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Dude could have earned $100 many times over with all the effort he put into trying to collect $100 he claims a woman owes him. As reported at www.phillyburbs.com:

A Falls man is accused of sending a woman 75 text messages threatening to set her house on fire, bomb her house and harm the woman’s special needs child if she didn’t pay off a $100 debt.

Say what? Let’s break it down.

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Yes, there is such a thing. Just ask this young man. As reported by The Arab Times:

A GCC youth, who is the son of a diplomat, has been released after being arrested for the third time for driving without a drivers’ license, reports Al-Watan Arabic daily. According to security sources, the youth was arrested three times but was released without receiving penalty, as he is the son of a diplomat and holds a diplomatic passport. Securitymen have submitted a report in this regard to the senior officials.

Now that’s a handy document for a little miscreant.

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The dumb part? Getting so drunk that he passed out. The lucky part? That he passed out on train tracks. Yes, that is the “lucky” part because this youngster crashed in between the tracks. So when the train ran over him, per The Des Moines Register:

Two railroad engineers for Iowa Interstate Railroad said they saw 17-year-old Christian Latshaw on the railroad tracks as they were moving east and crossing a Des Moines River bridge to East First Street south of Court Avenue about 10:45 p.m., according to a Des Moines police report.

When the engineers, David Good Jr. and John Knutson, realized a person was in front of the train, they applied the emergency brake, but the engine and first car still went over the top of Latshaw before the train stopped.

Latshaw told officers he had been drinking at the 80/35 Music Festival, about a mile away, then blacked out and woke up on the tracks.

Officers said Latshaw had bloodshot, watery eyes and smelled of alcohol. He was taken to Mercy Medical Center for treatment of two lacerations on the back of his head and a bruise on his right thigh.

The charges?

Latshaw was arrested and received a delayed referral to juvenile court on trespassing and public intoxication charges, according to the police report.

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First of all, is The Juice the only one who didn’t know some Walmarts are open 24 hours? Maybe if they had more “associates” working, things like this wouldn’t happen. Per The Belleville News-Democrat (Illinois):

According to police reports, two men walked into the [Wal-Mart store in Collinsville] at about 3:20 a.m. They each grabbed a TV and walked out of the store without paying. They got into a car where another man was waiting and fled the scene. The vehicle was described as a blue 1986 Chevrolet station wagon with license plate number R309361.

It’s probably a stolen car, right? Well, maybe not …

The description of the suspects’ vehicle matches a car that police said was used in a similar robbery May 6 at the Best Buy electronics store in Fairview Heights.

The men are still at large, though probably not for long. Here’s the source.

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You have to admit, it’s not the most illogical place to hide some sausage… It would appear, though, that this gent may have overdone it. Per The Cairns Post:

A man hit a snag with police after he stuffed his pants with sausages and a meat pack in an alleged theft at an Innisfail supermarket.

It is the region’s second case of shop-stealing involving sausages stashed in trousers in recent months. (You can read about the first one here.)

Police officers were called to the store after the 50-year-old was seen allegedly leaving without paying for the stash on Wednesday.

In a move that surely disappointed the bargain hunters out there …

It is understood the meat has been disposed of.

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Well, yes, the family that drinks together often does get drunk together. And they do stick together too. As reported by timesonline.com (Beaver, PA):

Rochester police said [Jason Dean] Sheets [25] Sheets and John William Moore Jr., 47, also of 300 Jackson St., Apartment 31, were pumping gas at Sheetz on Adams Street on May 1 when they began harassing a young black man in the store. The two men followed the man out of the store and an argument started, police said.

Not cool.

When officers arrested Sheets, he began to struggle, yell and swear at them, the police report said. Once inside the police car, Sheets tried to kick out the windows and slammed his head against the glass partition, police said.

And mom just stood by and … no?

[Annette Marie] Davis [44], who is Sheets’ mother, became irate during the arrest and also began to struggle with police and kick them in the legs.

Yikes. The charges?

Davis … is charged with two counts of aggravated assault, and one count each of resisting arrest, disorderly conduct and public drunkenness.

Sheets … is charged with two counts of aggravated assault, and one count each of resisting arrest, disorderly conduct and public drunkenness.

What about Mr. Moore?

Moore, who was driving the vehicle Sheets and Davis were riding in, was charged with drunken driving.

Here’s the source.

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Like most cities, Portland has some weird laws still on the books. As reported in the
The Oregonian:

… Then there are the head-scratchers. Publicly scraping clean the skeleton of one’s beloved in a cemetery is a criminal act. Chain letters are strictly prohibited. In city parks, it’s illegal to climb a tree, sit on a vase or lie upon a picnic table. Sailors fleeing a burning ship may, but are not required to, sound a horn or whistle in blasts of four to six seconds, no more or less. Teens might be breaking the law if they cruise down certain busy streets more than twice in a night.

You can read more (a fair amount) here.

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It was widely believed that EVERYONE knew ATMs have cameras. Perhaps now, with the arrest of this man, that is indeed the case. As seen at thebrooklynpaper.com:

A man was arrested for attempting to steal money from the same automated teller machine on Bedford Avenue four times between April 4 and May 2 by sticking pliers up the money slot.

Four times! With pliers!

The owner of the building between N. Fourth and N. Fifth streets gave police surveillance video that shows the 31-year-old man trying to get money out of the machine at 2 pm on April 4, 7 pm on April 4, at noon on April 9, and at 2:38 pm on May 2. Each time, he damaged the machine.

The determined suspect was charged with several counts of attempted grand larceny, criminal mischief, possession of burglar’s tools, and attempted petit larceny.

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Everyone knows nicotine is physically addictive. But check out what these gents went through just to get some cigarettes, per ThePoliceNews.net:

La Marque, Texas — Police are looking for two men who pulled pistols on a convenience store clerk and made off with a supply of cigarettes valued at about $100.

The pair of black men, dress all in black and wearing ski masks pulled the robbery Wednesday morning at the Main Street Grocery Store in the 1600 block of FM 519, then fled on foot.

Police ask anyone with information about the two call La Marque Crime Stoppers (409) 938.8477

Ski masks and guns for $100 in cigarettes? That’s a head-scratcher. Here’s the source.