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Evil%20bad%20Doctor.jpgSo you’re a doctor, and you’re convicted of sexual assault and drug trafficking. You automatically lose your license, right? Nope. Dr. Sean Buckingham, of Canada, was so convicted, and still has his license! What did he do? Per the National Post:

Nearly two dozen witnesses testified during the trial, including a number of complainants who alleged Dr. Sean Buckingham sexually assaulted them.

One woman testified Buckingham, 47, tied her to a tree, beat her with a branch and sodomized her. Another said he asked her for oral sex while her seven-month old daughter was on her lap. A witness also said Buckingham agreed to write her a prescription for painkillers, but only if he could have half.

Throughout the seven-week trial, witnesses told the court the incidents happened in Buckingham’s office, his home and his vehicle, sometimes after he picked them up at Narcotics Anonymous meetings.

At the time of his arrest two years ago, Buckingham was under police surveillance “from dawn to dusk.” Police recorded more than 3,000 phone calls during which the doctor occasionally spoke to people about “candy bars” and “cigarettes.”

The Crown said the items were code for drugs, in particular the highly addictive drug OxyContin, known as “hillbilly heroin.”

Damn! A bona fide predator with an MD. So he was convicted – now what? Per The Aurora:

The Newfoundland and Labrador College of Physicians and Surgeons have the power to revoke or suspend his medical licence, but they need to ‘investigate’ first. They acknowledged his conviction but as an ‘allegation against Buckingham’.

Wow, is there any such thing as automatic anymore? Seriously, who would even trust a doctor of his record with an ingrown toenail after all this?

What the hell is going on up there? To read more, click here and here.

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bad%20Luck%20unlucky%20superstitious.jpg That would be Steven Saleh’s Washington, DC apartment. Via Craigslist, Mr. Conklin came down from New York to crash there. Two days later, he was lying dead on Mr. Saleh’s living room floor. The cause? Acute intoxication – a mixture of alcohol and oxy.

Several days later, per The Washington Post, Dean Johnson arrived from New York to comfort Mr. Saleh. The next day, Johnson died in Saleh’s apartment of … acute intoxication. Per the Post:

As for Johnson, the office said, the tests showed that his fatal intoxication was caused by a combination of oxycodone and four other prescription drugs: clonazepam, an anti-anxiety medication with the brand name Klonopin; amitriptyline, an antidepressant sold as Elavil; ramelteon, a sleep aid marketed as Rozerem; and tramadol, a painkiller sold as Ultram.

What have the authorities concluded? No evidence of wrongdoing by Saleh. And his life’s not going so well, either. He suffers from a disabling illness that causes chronic pain and fatigue. You can read more here.

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A police car! A MARKED police car! Said the owner of the towing company, Gary Coe, “I think he just lost it.” Gresham, Oregon police officer Tom Pohlman was resonding to an assault-in-progress at 2:20 a.m. When he was told over the radio that “They’re towing you’re car,” Pohlman said “#@!&* + !&%*^#!” Actually, he said “You can’t print my response.” [Note to Officer Pohlman: This ain’t The Oregonian. Contact the Juice. We will print your response, unedited.]

Why would tow truck driver Steven Syverson, who had 8 months on the job without incident, try to tow a police car? Because the car was parked in a fire zone. Guess what? The police can do this. What happened to Syverson? Lots of bad stuff. As reported in The Oregonian, he was fired AND “arrested on accusations of car theft, obstructing governmental administration, interfering with a peace officer, and third-degree criminal mischief.”

So where does this rate on the weirdness scale? Per Officer Pohlman:

“I’ve been around cops and done this stuff since 1974,” says Pohlman, who, at 55, is eligible to retire. “And this is in the top five or six things that I can say I’ve ever seen people do. And I’ve seen some pretty weird things.”

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kegs%20beer%20lots.jpg Talk about weird laws. In the state of Utah – I shit you not – it is illegal to have a keg party! Section 32A-12-206 – Unlawful sale or supply of beer – provides as follows:

(1) A person may not sell, offer to sell, or otherwise furnish or supply beer to the general public in containers larger than two liters. This does not preclude licensed beer wholesalers from selling, offering to sell, or otherwise furnishing or supplying beer in containers larger than two liters to beer retailers authorized by this title to dispense beer on draft for consumption on the beer retailer’s licensed premises.

(2) A person may not purchase or possess beer in containers larger than two liters unless the person is a beer retailer authorized by this title to dispense beer on draft for consumption on the beer retailer’s licensed premises.

Two liters! That’s exactly 67.6280451 ounces – less than a six-pack-worth of beer! People, rise up!

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escape%20from%20jail%20prison.gif So this dude, Omid Tahvili (per the Globe and Mail, “a top member of a Persian gang in the Lower Mainland that supplied drugs to Toronto”), was the number two flight risk in all of British Columbia. He was being held in the wing of a high-tech prison with 60 other inmates. Guess how many guards were on duty when Tahvili escaped? ONE! With major issues, too! He’s been charged with aiding Mr. Tahvili’s escape.

Where is Mr. Tahvili? Nobody knows, though he does call his lawyer occasionally. He’s willing to turn himself in on one condition – that his sentence is time served! What does his lawyer think about the chances of him returning?

I have no doubt whatsoever that Mr. Tahvili has absconded … and has no intention of returning for his sentencing hearing.

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Barber%20Pole.jpg Melissa Franklin has been cutting hair for 16 years. She trained under 3 master barbers. She’s been cutting hair in Whitefish, Montana for almost 10 years. There’s only one problem – she’s a licensed “cosmetologist,” not a licensed “barber.” Nobody in town cares. The Montana Board of Barbers and Cosmetologists does, though.

When an inspector told Ms. Franklin that she couldn’t display a red, white and blue barbershop pole because she wasn’t a barber, she took his advice and removed the blue stripe. The end, right? Not even close. The inspector returned a year later – with his camera – and brought the evidence to his bosses. As reported in The Missoulian, the Board then sent Ms. Franklin a letter telling her:

Get rid of that pole. And not just that pole out front. The painted pole on the window, too. And the little antique wooden pole on the wall that advertises shave and a haircut 5 cents, tooth pulling 2 cents. And the plastic spray bottles, whose cylindrical bodies are colored to look like poles.

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[Remove the “Liar” graphic? Let me know with the “Contact Us” box at the top of the page.]
15-year-old Eric Crespo was charged with attempted murder and illegal possession of a gun. On the night of his arrest, he was interrogated by Detective Perino for over an hour. In court, though, Perino sang a different tune. As reported in The Village Voice:

Under cross-examination by Crespo’s attorney, Mark DeMarco, Perino denied 11 more times that he had any conversations with Crespo after he was in custody.

“I never interrogated your client, sir,” Perino told DeMarco.

Turns out that was 12 outright lies!

After questioning Perino, DeMarco turned over the MP3 recording to the prosecutor prompting the district attorney’s office to drop the most serious charge of attempted murder. Crespo eventually pleaded guilty to illegal possession of a gun.

Doh! And it was quite an interrogation, too. Check out this morsel from Detective Perino:

DET PERINO: NOW EVEN IF I WENT TO A COURT OF LAW…THEY’RE
GONNA FUCKING ACCUSE ME OF TRICKING YOU, THEY’RE GONNA ACCUSE ME OF FUCKING PUTTING WORDS IN YOUR MOUTH. THEY ALWAYS DO THAT TO THE DETECTIVES. I’M THE BIGGEST FUCKING LIAR IN THE WORLD WHEN THEY BRING ME INTO THE COURT.

At least he was telling the truth then. You can read a huge chunk of the recorded interrogation in The Village Voice piece.

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judge%20mean%20bad%20evil%20nasty%20crazy%20weird.gif Judge John P. Wulle, of the Clark County, Washington Superior Court, was attending a conference entitled “Planning Your Juvenile Drug Court in Los Angeles in July 2006. I know, skip the details – get to the dirt. Here’s some of what he said, as set forth in the “Stipulation” entered into by the Judge and the Commission on Judicial Conduct:

During a breakout session, the team’s facilitator wrote a star on an assignment the team completed and said jokingly, “Clark County gets a star.” Respondent [Judge Wulle] replied, “I don’t need a star, I’m not a Jew.”

Later in the week, during a break in the conference, other faculty members asked [Judge Wulle] who Clark County’s facilitator was, and he answered, “the black gay guy.”

A team member asked [Judge Wulle] to lower his voice … and he acknowledged the request by raising his middle finger at the team member.

During a breakout session … [Judge Wulle] became frustrated with the pace or direction of discussion, and announced it was time for the group to move on to the next topic. A fellow team member spoke up, “No Judge, this is important, we need to work through this,” or words to that effect. In response to this seemingly respectful entreaty, [Judge Wulle] angrily yelled, “F_ _ _ you” and threw his pen down on a table and left the room. [Regular Juice readers know that I don’t delete expletives. The Commission does, though.]

Zoinks! Maybe it’s me, but it seems like Judge Wulle wasn’t real pleased about attending the conference. If you want to read the full “Stipulation, Agreement and Order of Censure,” click here.

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I don’t think there’s any doubt that Anthony Vakeva’s bird-flipping days are over. In January 2005, Mr. Vakeva flipped off Mr. Blackwell at a red light. I’m guessing he would have thought twice about doing so had he known that Blackwell was a TRAINED AMATEUR BOXER (with a very short fuse.) It didn’t end when Blackwell sucker-punched Vakeva and kicked him in the head many times. After he was arrested and released on bail, Blackwell went and shot Vakeva! He was just sentenced to …. 8 years. You can read more here.

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