Squeezed on:

By

At least they can in Lake County, Florida. I was just kidding about Jackass. It was Jackass Number Two that a kid who appeared to be about 11 rented! And the issue was born.

The library board voted 9-0 against a policy that would prohibit kids under 17 from renting R-rated movies. Lake County commissioners are set to discuss the board’s recommendation today.

So what’s the reasoning behind the unanimous vote? Movie ratings are set by a private group, the Motion Picture Association of America. According to Assistant County Attorney Kimberly Williams, “It’s an unconstitutional delegation of authority for the county to use those MPAA ratings as a guideline for obscenity.” Her opinion is supported by several court decisions, including one by a federal judge in Minnesota last year.

By
Posted in: Best Of
Squeezed on:
Updated:
Squeezed on:

By

taser%20police%20crazy%20abuse%20use.jpg
Really. This happened to 16-year-old Ozark, Missouri resident Mace Hutchinson. Here’s the story, from ky3.com:

A family from Branson wants answers about what happened to their son that left him hospitalized. Early Saturday morning, police found Mace Hutchinson, 16, underneath the Highway F overpass over U.S. 65. Mace ended up in intensive care at a hospital. His parents believe the actions of Ozark police officers contributed to his injuries and slowed doctors’ abilities to speed his recovery.

We called the police. My wife was afraid he was going to get ran over or hit,” said witness Doug Messersmith.

Continue reading →
Squeezed on:

By

judge%20mad%20angry%20furious%20upset%20crazy%20bad%20pissed.gif Several parents have accused Cameron County (Texas) Justice of the Peace Gustavo “Gus” Garza of ordering them to paddle or spank their kids in court. Per The Brownsville Herald:

This morning, [Judge] Limas will hear the request for a temporary restraining order against Garza first brought last week by Mary Vasquez and her husband Daniel Zurita, who filed a lawsuit against the justice of the peace, a former state district attorney and special prosecutor.

They allege that Garza compelled Zurita to spank his teen stepdaughter under threat that she would be found guilty of a criminal offense and fined $500 for not attending school unless spanked.

Continue reading →
Squeezed on:

By

stripper%20nude%20dancer%20silhouette%20naked%20on%20a%20Pole.png
In Hamburg, Iowa, the owner of Shotgun Geniez was charged with violating obscenity laws after a 17-year-old danced nude there. The defense? It’s not a strip club. It’s a theater, and is therefore exempt from Iowa’s obscenity laws. The result? As reported in The Omaha World-Herald:

“The evidence proved beyond a reasonable doubt Shotgun Geniez is primarily a strip club that features nude dancing. The transparent efforts to appear to be a museum or art center are not convincing. Calling a business a theater does not make it so.”

“Shotgun Geniez, nevertheless, meets the ordinary definition of theater.”

Continue reading →
Squeezed on:

By

motorcycle%20speed%20funny%20joke%20fast.jpg
130 MPH on a motorcycle! As if that’s not bad enough, per Sky News,

[Christopher O’Donovan] led police on a 23-mile high speed chase across the Wiltshire countryside, racing through villages and tracks and along several A-roads.

Witnesses say up to 17 police vehicles pursued O’Donovan before the police helicopter took over the chase.

How did they catch Mr. O’Donovan?

He was eventually arrested after returning home.

Mr. O’Donovan was sentenced to 15 months in prison, at least half of which he’ll probably have to serve. Here a few more egregious speeding cases from the United Kingdom:

In 2002 motorcyclist Lee Beddis was caught on a speed camera travelling at 155mph. He was sentenced to 180 hours community punishment and a 12 month ban. Drivers on the A465 in Wales said they saw a ‘blur’ as he passed, and a traffic officer said the pressure from the bike shook his patrol car.

The following year Andrew Osborne was jailed for 28 days after overtaking a lorry at 157mph on an A-road near Buckingham.

Squeezed on:

By

badge%20fake%20toy%20police%20funny%20joke.jpg How do you get free porn? Well, here’s what a guy in Longmont, Colorado tried, as reported by The Longmont Times:

… the man provided a badge and a business card without a name, and told the clerks he was a detective with the Longmont Police Department’s “age verification unit,” which does not exist. The man claimed he would verify the ages of the performers in the videos …

Ah, yes. The old Ronald Reagan favorite: “Trust, but verify.” The Longmont Police are now attempting to find this good samaritan …

By
Posted in: Wacky
Squeezed on:
Updated:
Squeezed on:

By

computer%20throwing%20window%20out%20stupid%20monitor.jpg

So 55-year-old Wyoming resident David Anthony Vaughn was enjoying “Iron Man” at the Eastridge Movies when the unthinkable occurred – the projector malfunctioned. Noooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!! When Mr. Vaughan demanded a refund, he was offered a voucher to see another movie. Maybe a later showing of “Iron Man?” Anyway, as reported in the Casper Star-Tribune:

According to witnesses, Vaughn became agitated as theater employees tried to explain their policy to him, yelling at workers and telling other patrons they were being ripped off. One customer heard him say that he was going to get his money’s worth before he ripped a computer monitor from the ticket counter and threw it through the glass door. After breaking the glass, the monitor came to rest by a table in the mall food court.

Shazam! Makes you wonder what he would do when faced with a serious injustice (real or perceived). Surely when the police arrived, Mr. Vaughan realized that, perhaps, he overreacted?

Vaughn told [Sgt.] Randel his actions were justified because the theater refused to refund a patron’s money.

He was busted and booked. Here’s the source.

Squeezed on:

By

drugs%20are%20u%20on%20drugs%20you%20bad%20evil.jpg
From the Police Blotter of the Daily Nexus, at the University of California, Santa Barbara:

Sun., Aug. 2, 2:47 a.m. — Officers working the late shift received a call concerning a man loitering at the 7-Eleven convenience store on Hollister Avenue.

According to the employee, the 35-year old man was leaning his face against the front windows, pressing his lips against the glass and leaving slobbery smooches for the clerk.

Continue reading →
By
Posted in: Wacky
Squeezed on:
Updated:
Squeezed on:

By

Crazy%20Grandma%20grandmother%20nuts%20insane%20wacky.jpg

Of course grandparents spoil their grandchildren. Maybe a little candy from grandma, or some new clothes. But how about this: 54-year-old Brenda Bouschet was arrested after driving around a Marathon, Florida supermarket parking lot with her 3-year-old granddaughter sitting on the roof! Not to worry, said Ms. Bouschet. Per the AP, “she was driving at “snail-speed” and holding the child’s leg.” And besides, she was just doing it to give the child some air and let her have some fun. Doesn’t everyone do this sort of thing? Uh, no. Ms. Bouschet is looking at child abuse charges.

By
Posted in: Uncool
Squeezed on:
Updated:
Squeezed on:

By

As Police Cmdr. Kelly McMillin said: “you couldn t make up something stranger than this.” So here’s what happened, per knbc.com. Old Edward Bishop went and stole himself a pickup truck. Not so exciting, but …

…while [Mr. Bishop was] sitting outside a convenience store, a man with a gun hopped in and ordered him to start driving.

The car thief got jacked! Problem was, nobody looked at the fuel gauge.

The pickup ran out of gas and the gunman ordered Bishop to get out and push, but Bishop ran away and called police.

Now both Mr. Bishop and jacker Jomo Sexton are in the pokey.

By
Posted in: Wacky
Squeezed on:
Updated: