Articles Posted in Yikes

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Sure, lots of folks pick up a few keepsakes when they’re on vacation. Maybe something to remind them of the fun they had on the trip. Well check out what this man picked up in Tibet, as reported by The Highline Times (Washington State):

A traveler was stopped at the Sea-Tac Airport by a dog that smelled something funny. Customs and Border Protection agriculture specialists contacted the man and he told them he had four yak skulls in his duffel bag. The traveler told the specialists he found two of the skulls while hiking in Tibet. He also bought two yak skulls at a village store to keep as souvenirs. Two of the skulls had dried flesh on them, which is what alerted a federal Beagle named Woody. An Agriculture program manager said the skulls were destroyed under high-pressure steam to prevent the introduction of animal diseases.

Nothing like a fleshy yak skull to start that stroll down memory lane.

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Seriously, are you ever going to escape from the police armed with a dildo? From The Chicago Tribune:

Carolee Bildsten, 56, of Gurnee, will plead not guilty next month to accusations that she charged an officer with the “clear, rigid feminine pleasure device” described in a police report, defense attorney Neil Calanca said.

Mr. Calanca was not pleased with the inclusion of a description of the “weapon.”

A former police officer, Calanca said the officer involved in the incident “should be ashamed of himself,” and that he would have been embarrassed to include such information in a police report. Gurnee police Cmdr. Jay Patrick countered that such reports “are required to be a factual account of an incident.”

So what led to the brandishing of the “clear, rigid feminine pleasure device?”

The alleged assault occurred when the officer went with Bildsten to her apartment in the 5300 block of David Court on Nov. 9 after employees at Joe’s Crab Shack in Gurnee accused her of dining without paying for the second time, according to Patrick.

Bildsten reached into a dresser drawer for what the officer thought was money to pay her bill, but instead pulled out the “pleasure device,” police allege. The officer deflected the sex toy with his hand, and he was not injured, Patrick said.

The charges?

Along with the aggravated assault charge, Bildsten is scheduled to appear in court on Jan. 27 on the Crab Shack-related theft of services charge and an unrelated charge for aggravated driving under the influence of alcohol.

Click here for the source.

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Kids play. Balls go into neighbors’ yards. No big deal, right? Normally, yes. Here, it was a BIG deal. As reported by the Flagler County Sheriff’s office:

A 56-year-old Palm Coast man was arrested Tuesday evening and charged with three misdemeanors after deputies said he fired a gun after a basketball rolled into his yard.

Bam!

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A bender? Not uncommon. Driving while on a bender? Common, but thankfully not as common. Getting busted while driving on a bender? Less common. Getting busted TWICE IN THE SAME DAY while on a bender? Fortunately, extremely rare, but it does happen… As reported by The Beaver County Times (Pennsylvania):

Around 9 a.m. that … morning, [Yvette L.] Cavallo [29] was charged by Harmony Township police with driving under the influence of a controlled substance and possession of a controlled substance.

In that case, police said, Cavallo admitted to taking a combination of pills and then texting while driving. Cavallo hit a telephone pole in the 3700 block of Duss Avenue in Harmony, police said.

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Is it really fair to sentence someone to four years in prison for stealing underwear? Before you answer that, you might want to ask “how many times?” and “from where?” As reported by the Winnipeg Free Press:

James Duerksen spent more than two decades invading the privacy of unsuspecting female victims and satisfying his sexual fetishes. Now the convicted serial lingerie thief is headed to prison after the Manitoba Court of Appeal overturned a conditional sentence that allowed him to remain free in the community.

Duerksen, 40, learned this week the high court has imposed a four-year sentence for crimes they call “strange and disconcerting.” Duerksen, a married father of two, pleaded guilty last year to 92 charges of break, enter and theft that occurred over a 21-year period in Manitoba and Alberta.

Shazam! You can read more (a fair amount) here.

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So you’re saying that stealing a $1 soda can lead to a felony charge? Well, yeah. Here’s how, as reported by the Naples Daily News:

After filling a courtesy cup with soda Thursday at the McDonald’s soda fountain and then leaving the restaurant, Mark Abaire, 52, of the 500 block of 14th Street North, was arrested by Collier deputies and now faces a felony theft charge, a sheriff’s report shows.

Really? A felony?

A manager told sheriff’s deputies that Abaire entered the store and asked for a glass of water around 10 p.m. Although the employee told him the cup was for water, Abaire filled it with soda at a fountain machine and sat outside the restaurant, according to an arrest report.

During a conversation with the manager, Abaire declined to pay for the soda, valued at $1, refused to leave the premises, and cursed at the manager, the report stated.

Okay, wrong, uncool, but a felony? Please explain.

While his charge is petty theft, because of previous petty theft convictions, the charge for drinking the unpaid-for soda was increased from a misdemeanor to a felony, the arrest report shows. In Florida, a third-degree felony can result in a sentence of up to 5 years in prison and a $5,000 fine.

Seems a little harsh, even for an enhancement, no? And to add to this gent’s woes …

Abaire faces additional misdemeanor counts of trespassing and disorderly intoxication. On Saturday, he remained in the Collier County jail with bond set at $6,500.

You’ll find the source, and a mug shot, here.

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If you like McDonald’s iced tea, stop reading now. Remember, The Juice warned you. As reported by wsoctv.com:

Greenville County deputies say a McDonald’s employee spit in the iced tea of two customers after they returned them saying the drinks weren’t sweet enough.

You were warned. What’s the evidence?

Investigators say surveillance video caught 19-year-old Marvin Washington Jr. leaning over the cups before he filled them at the Simpsonville restaurant on Saturday.

Authorities say the customers discovered the phlegm when they removed the lids of the drinks to put more sugar in because the second glasses also weren’t sweet enough.

Can you imagine watching that video in slow motion? Yikes.

The McDonald’s owner says he follows stringent food safety procedures and asked people not to reach conclusions until all the facts come out.

So, lax food safety procedures would allow spitting in drinks?

Washington was arrested Wednesday and charged with malicious tampering with food. He could face up to 20 years in prison if found guilty. It wasn’t clear if he had a lawyer.

Up to 20 years? That’s just idiotic. Here’s the source.

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The good news? No injuries. The bad news (for this young man, anyway – good for the rest of us)? This young man is in the soup. As reported by the Hunterdon County Democrat (New Jersey):

Police responded to a report of a suspicious vehicle on Route 523 in Readington. The vehicle was found to be in reverse, with the engine running, and when police nudged [Matthew] Kelly [19] to see if he was awake, the man’s foot slid off the brake pedal and the vehicle rolled backwards into a tree.

Yikes. Surely that must have awakened him?

Kelly was still asleep after striking the tree, police said.

Police did manage to awaken him, after which he was …

…charged with careless driving, driving while intoxicated and being under the influence of a controlled dangerous substance.

Here’s the source.

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Woman looking for hook up hooks up with man looking for same. But this was no ordinary hook-up, as reported by theprovince.com.

The 43-year-old man had met a woman four years his senior in a bar in the southern German city on Monday and she took him back to her apartment for sex, a police spokesman said in a statement.

“There they had sexual intercourse several times,” the spokesman said.

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