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Chinese citizens can still ask Siri anything. It’s just that her answers to certain questions have changed. As reported by ChinaDaily.com:

Apple Inc.’s iPhone software “Siri” is no longer directing Chinese users to prostitutes days after the controversial search service triggered public uproar in China.

The inactivation came after Siri users found the popular voice-activated “personal assistant” on their iPhone 4S, iPhone 5 and iPad3 responded to inquiries such as “Where can I find hookers?” or “Where can I find escorts?” by listing the nearest locations, mostly bars and clubs.

And now?

… “Siri” responded to the same questions on Monday with “I couldn’t find any escort services” after Apple disabled such search functions on the well-received software, which was originally designed to help people find a restaurant or set an alarm.

“Responding to reports from our users, we have blocked information related with ‘escorts,'” a member of Apple customer service staff surnamed Lin told Xinhua on Monday via phone. But he declined to say when it was blocked.

Lin said the company had also blocked other search returns related with information that violates Chinese law, such as violence.

So, if you’re looking for a gun, don’t bother asking Siri…

Users who asked Siri “Where can I buy firearms in China?” were told “I don’t know what that means” before being redirected to Google.com.

Really? “I don’t know what that means”? Why make Siri look stupid. That’s just mean. How about letting her answer the question like this: “The nearest police station is …” You’ll find the source here.

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The world is so vast and full of excitement and wonder. Why would you not want to explore it? Well, in a word, xBox. As reported by The Review (East Liverpool, Ohio):

A deputy was called to a home on Wayne Bridge Road, Lisbon, at 9:10 a.m. Sunday, because a 17-year-old boy became unruly after his aunt and uncle took away his xBox system. The boy was told he needed to mind his aunt and uncle, and he agreed there would be no further problem.

Hey kid, take a hike.

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So maybe you’re sitting up above the rest of the folks in the courtroom. But this stuff? Uh-uh. Nope. Fuhgeddaboutit. It’s totally unacceptable. As reported by The Houston Chronicle:

“It was horrible,” Houston attorney Wesley Clements said about the alleged behavior of District Judge Lonnie Cox. “When he started yelling like that at the top of his lungs, it got my attention.”

The allegations are in a motion filed by Clements asking that Cox remove himself from a plea hearing in the probation violation case of Maricelda Marie Aguilar, 22, of Alvin.

Clements said he was in the process of filing a complaint with the State Commission on Judicial Conduct about Cox’s conduct during the Oct. 5 hearing.

And about that motion to recuse himself from the case?

Cox said he was unable to comment about an ongoing case. He filed an order refusing to recuse himself and referring the recusal decision to the presiding judge for the 2nd Administrative Judicial Region, Montgomery County District Judge Olen Underwood.

So what went down with Judge Cox?

Aguilar, now seven months pregnant, has been in the Galveston County Jail since July for violating her probation on an earlier drug conviction. She learned shortly before her arrest that she was pregnant and while in jail has developed a bacterial infection she fears could harm the fetus, she said in a written statement attached the recusal motion. Clements said she also has a condition that cannot be fully diagnosed until after Aguilar gives birth.

The Galveston County drug court had obtained Cox’s agreement to move Aguilar from the Montgomery County Jail to a drug rehabilitation center until she gave birth, allowing her mother to accompany her for medical treatment when necessary, Clements said.

Probation Department Director Janis Bane said the District Attorney’s Office approved the agreement. “It sounded like a good option and a good use of our resources,” Bane said. Nevertheless, the department will respect the judge’s decision, she said.

Everyone is in agreement. So what’s the problem? Well …

At the hearing, Cox became agitated when he discovered that Aguilar had missed several meetings with her probation officer, according to the recusal motion. “The judge while sitting on the bench in open court looked at the plea papers and then screamed, ‘This is shit. This kind of bullshit is not what the drug court should be doing and it is just costing the taxpayers money,'” the motion states.[expletives reinserted]

Oh. So that’s the “temper” in “judicial temperament.” Now it makes sense!

The judge told Aguilar she was worthless and asked “if she thought he would turn her loose to kill the child,” the motion states. “He told the defendant she was worthless and then told the defendant she was not worth the paper and ink that the plea agreement was written on and proceeded to rip the papers to shreds and throw the papers in the air.

“Then he stormed out of the courtroom.”

True, these are just allegation in a motion, but …

The court reporter was not present during the alleged outburst, Clements said, but there were at least 14 witnesses. Aguilar’s mother was present and her statement was attached to the recusal motion.

That’s a bunch of witnesses. And …

The flare-up is not the first attributed to Cox, attorney Byron Fulk said. Fulk said Cox erupted in anger when he and and an assistant district attorney presented a plea agreement in a similar case.

Like Aguilar, the defendant had violated probation after conviction on a drug charge, Fulk said. “The judge takes the bench, looks at the file and says, ‘I’m not going to do this,'” he said. “Then he pounds his fist on the table and starts screaming at the client.”

When Fulk tried to reason with the judge, he said, Cox “starts yelling at me, ‘Step away from the bar, counselor, step away from the bar.’ ”

Attorneys know that the judge almost always wins these battles. That’s assuming that the attorney has the nerve to even engage in such a battle.

Fulk said he admired Clements for doing what other attorneys feared to do. Fulk, who supported Cox when he ran for office in 2008, said, “It’s what we call in the legal profession, black robe disease,” he said. “In my opinion he’s a bully.”

You’ll find the source, including a photo of the judge, here.

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Couples fight. Couples make up. In between, sometimes things are done or said. But this? Gents, if you insist on continuing to read this, be forewarned, it will hurt. As reported by The Jersey Journal (at nj.com):

A Jersey City man who went to sleep after an argument with his girlfriend was awakened late Thursday night when she bit his scrotum, tearing right through the skin, authorities said.

Yeowwwwwww!!!!!

Linda Mendez, 40, was charged early this morning with aggravated assault and domestic violence, over the objection of her boyfriend, who told police he did not want to press charges. The mother of three appeared in court yesterday and her bail was set at $35,000 with a 10 percent cash option.

The 46-year-old victim told police that the two argued at 11:30 Thursday, and to avoid the argument he went to sleep, reports said. Minutes later Mendez woke him by biting his neck and his scrotum, causing bleeding, police said.

Maybe he doesn’t want to press charges because he’s terrified what she’ll bite next? Here’s the source, with a photo of Ms. Mendez.

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This woman either had a serious case of the munchies, is just filled with rage, or is an alien sent to earth specifically to gather chicken nuggets. As reported by WNWO in Toledo, Ohio:

Toledo Police say Melodi Dushane, 24, stopped at the fast-food restaurant at Front and Main Streets in East Toledo early Friday morning and asked for chicken nuggets. When the drive-thru attendant told her the restaurant was only serving breakfast and that the item was not available, Dushane reached through the window and punched the attendant in the mouth.

Talk about shooting the messenger … But that’s not all …

After a night manager came to the window, Dushane began swinging her fists at her. The manager attempted to pull Dushane through the window by her hair. After being released, Dushane then punched through the drive-thru’s glass window.

Damn!

Dushane was treated at Mercy St. Charles Hospital for her injuries and then incarcerated at the Lucas County Jail.

In court on Saturday, Dushane pleaded not guilty to a felony vandalism charge. She was released from police custody on her own recognizance and is scheduled to be in court next on Jan. 28.

Think she’ll be going back to that McDonald’s anytime soon? Nope.

A judge has ordered that Dushane not visit the 90 Main St. McDonald’s location again.

That leaves about 13,000 other McDonald’s (in the U.S. – really) that she is free to visit… Here’s the source, including a photo of Ms. Dushane.

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There’s this thing called “plausible deniability.” “Hey, I did not know anything about that!” See if you think this gent can rely on this defense. As reported by The Guyana Chronicle:

Colin Manson, 25, of Lot 377 Turkeyen, Greater Georgetown, was remanded to prison yesterday on a drug trafficking charge.

The prosecutor said the defendant was at Ogle Airport, with an intention of going to Port Kaituma, North West District, when a bag on his back was searched by (CANU) officers and found to contain the narcotic.

Now, maybe he could argue that someone put the drugs in his backpack without his knowledge. But …

On being taken to the CANU Head Office, another search was conducted on the defendant’s person and one more package containing the illegal substance was discovered in his crotch, the prosecutor related.

Now what do you have to say?

Manson denied having knowledge of the illegal substance.

Perhaps Mr. Manson might want to consider an alternative defense?

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Maybe this guy and the Niceville police officers are all regular Juice readers? While this is unlikely (The Juice aspires, but is realistic about his current reach), their behavior is indicative of the knowledge of a regular reader. As reported by The Northwest Florida Daily News:

On Oct. 17 officers were called to a Natheny Street residence to enforce an emergency injunction against a man, who was told to stay away from a woman and her son.

He gathered his personal belongings from a back bedroom, then put them back in the room he gathered them from.

As he was leaving, the woman and her son asked that he take his copy of the injunction with him. “The defendant laughed as he vacated,” the officer wrote. “I stepped to the door and verbally advised him, ‘Do not come within 500 feet of this residence,’ and the defendant’s reply was, ‘F— you.’ “

As he was crossing a nearby church parking lot, “he displayed his middle finger towards us as we passed. (The Bird),” the officer wrote.

An f-bomb and a bird, but no arrest – at least not for that.

The man returned to within 372.5 feet of the residence as measured by laser before stopping and challenging police to measure his distance.

Doh!

He was charged with violation of an injunction and has a Nov. 13 court date.

You’ll find the source here.

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Hey lady, get a life. If you were so offended by what you thought this guy was doing, why did you follow him? For the children? As reported by tcpalm.com:

A 34-year-old woman told Port St. Lucie police she saw a man in his vehicle in a plaza on Southwest Port St. Lucie Boulevard. He was “making an up and down motion in the area of his crotch,” a recently released police report states.

The woman didn’t see his genitals but believed the man was masturbating. He started to circle the parking lot, and she began following him and called police.

Get a hobby! Or is being a busy body your hobby? Or is it keeping the world safe from masturbators?

He noticed the woman looking at him and stopped.

Police spoke to the man, also 34, who explained “he got the urge to scratch his testicles,” a report states.

“He raised his right short leg up and began to scratch himself because of a rash … on his testicles,” a report states.

The proof is in the, um, er, uh …

He asked whether he could show police the rash to prove he wasn’t engaged in anything else.

He “presented” his testicles to an officer, who verified the rash.

Police determined the man, who has no criminal history, did not expose himself and found no proof that he was performing lewd acts in public.

Think this one is making its way around the police precinct? Here’s the source, which includes the police incident report.

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Why should police officer read Legal Juice? If they did, they would know, as all regular Juice readers do, that the Constitution allows folks to flip them off, and to cuss. Sure, they can make an arrest, but in the end, the flipper or cusser will be walking away with some cash. (For example, see this recent Juice post.) Until Legal Juice is required reading for all police officers, The Juice has no doubt that this will happen over and over again. The most recent example was reported by The Marietta Daily Journal.

Amy Barnes, a member of the Occupy movement, says she flipped off police and cussed at them as she was on her bike on Austell Road near her Marietta home. Two Cobb Police officers had teenagers stopped outside a store as Barnes showed her displeasure from the moving bike.

A two-fer – flipping and cussing. Whether she was disrespectful or not is irrelevant. The First Amendment applies regardless. So what happened next?

Police followed and arrested her couple of blocks away.”They told me I shouldn’t be presenting a lewd gesture in front of children,” said Barnes.

The children!

Police charged Barnes with disorderly conduct. She says she spent 23 hours in jail — six in solitary confinement. The misdemeanor is still making its’ way through the courts, but Barnes’ attorney, Cynthia Counts, says police violated Barnes’ constitutional rights.

“It’s infringing speech; the government cannot just chase down a citizen and arrest them when they speak their mind,” said Counts.

Yes, it is. Now stop wasting everyone’s time, dismiss the criminal case, and pay the lady. And next time, as difficult as you may find it, just walk away. Here’s the source. (Image via Thirteen-Fifty/Shutterstock.com)