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So maybe, maybe when the police find a body, they miss a small stab wound. But, and this a big “but,” what if the knife is still in the body? Could they miss it? Yup. As reported in The Medway Messenger:

Police failed to spot a dead pensioner had been murdered – until undertakers found a knife in his back, an inquest heard.

Officers were called to the home of Antoine Denis, in New Road, Chatham, after neighbours raised the alarm.

The 66-year-old was pronounced dead by a police nurse when he was found slumped on his bedroom floor.

But an inquest was told the weapon and a stab wound were only found by undertakers as they prepared to move his body on January 9.

DC [Detective Constable] Linda Robb told coroner Roger Sykes the knife was missed because it was dark in the flat and Mr Denis was lying on his back.

What, you expected that a police officer would turn the body over? Don’t be ridiculous.

Recording a verdict of unlawful killing, Mr Sykes said Mr Denis had died from a single stab wound, which penetrated his lung due to “the unlawful act of a person whose identity has not yet been established”.

The perp? Still at large.

Kim Albone, of Luton Road, Chatham, was charged with murder on January 21, but was later released after a decision by the Crown Prosecution Service. Officers are still hunting Mr Denis’ killer.

Here’s the source.

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A handcuffed man (behind the back!) escapes from your patrol car, and you’re going to include a charge of stealing handcuffs? Are you sure that’s a part of the case you really want to highlight? Pick one: “Fugitive escapes!” or “Handcuffed fugitive in back of patrol car escapes, and steals $29 handcuffs that are supposed to be restraining him, under the nose of the officer who should be watching him.” As reported by The Daily News (Washington State):

A DOC officer arrested Eric Mitchell Lair on a felony warrant Oct. 1, according to a Longview police report. On the way to Cowlitz County jail, “Lair was able to open the back of (an) unmarked DOC caged vehicle and flee,” the report said.

“Lair was handcuffed behind his back at the time of escape,” the report said. Officers from multiple agencies conducted an “extensive search” of the area, but couldn’t find Lair.

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Sorry, but it’s that “Ellen” thing. That’s essentially why Heartland Inns of America fired Brenna Lewis, according to Ms. Lewis. But Ms. Lewis may have the last word, as reported by Courthouse News Service.

An Iowa hotel clerk who describes herself as “slightly more masculine” can sue her former employer for allegedly firing her because she wasn’t pretty enough and she lacked “the Midwestern girl look,” the 8th Circuit ruled.

Here’s the background:

Lewis said she was fired in 2007 for not conforming to sex stereotypes and for questioning recent policy changes.

Lewis has “an Ellen DeGeneres kind of look,” according to her former manager, Lori Stifel. “Lewis prefers to wear loose fitting clothing, including men’s button-down shirts and slacks,” the ruling states. “She avoids makeup and wore her hair short at the time. Lewis has been mistaken for a male and referred to as ‘tomboyish.'”

BFD. Apparently it was, to Ms. Barbara Cullinan, director of operations…

Cullinan allegedly said Lewis lacked “the Midwestern girl look,” and stressed the importance of having a “pretty” desk staff.

When Cullinan told Stifel to move Lewis to the night shift, Stifel allegedly stuck up for Lewis, saying she had been doing a “phenomenal job at the front desk.”

Well done, madam.

The next week, Cullinan asked Stifel to resign and implemented stricter hiring rules, explaining that “hotels have to have a certain personification and appearance,” Lewis claimed.

No good deed goes unpunished. But Judge Diana Murphy had the last word, at least for now.

“Cullinan’s criticism of Lewis for lack of ‘prettiness’ and the ‘Midwestern girl look’ before terminating her may … be found by a reasonable factfinder to be evidence of wrongful sex stereotyping,” she wrote.

Here’s the source.

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I doubt a beat cop ever goes an entire shift without being flagged down by a citizen in need. How often, though, do you think a cop is flagged down by a citizen who wants to know if there are any warrants for her arrest? At least once. It happened in Ohio, as reported in The Cincinnati Enquirer.

… in Lockland when 44-year-old Selma Elmore stopped Officer Dan Lyons on South Wayne Avenue about 2:30 a.m. Friday, police said.

Elmore asked the officer: Is there a curfew for adults in Lockland?

No curfew, Lyons responded.

Second question: Is there a warrant for my arrest?

Yes, in fact there is a warrant, the officer told her after a quick check.

Here’s another question: WHY WOULD YOU ASK THAT?

Lyons had discovered Elmore was wanted for allegedly failing to pay a fine as a result of a drug-related conviction, said Sgt. Patrick Sublet.

Ms. Elmore didn’t take the news very well. Not only did she bolt, but when Sgt. Sublet caught her, she shoved him into a building. Brilliant! And now …

She faces a new charge of resisting arrest.

Doh! Here’s the source, including a photo of Ms. Elmore.

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Should a judge be allowed to clearly flout the Constitution with impunity? The Juice certainly hopes not, because Mississippi Chancellor [a Judge in the Chancery Court] Talmadge Littlejohn deserves, at a minimum, to be reprimanded. Why? A lawyer in his court would not recite the Pledge of Allegiance. And when Judge Littlejohn tried to force him to recite it, attorney Danny Lampley held his ground.

If you think that a judge would know that you can’t force someone to say the Pledge, you would be wrong. Perhaps in his reading of the Constitution, Judge Littlejohn skipped the first amendment? So what happened to Mr. Lampley for asserting his constitutional right in a court of law? Per The Northeast Mississippi Daily Journal:

At 10 a.m., Lampley was in jail garb. By 2:30 p.m., Littlejohn ordered his release and return to the Lee County Justice Center to continue their business.

4 1/2 hours in jail! Here are Mr. Lampley’s choice words for the Judge:

Lampley said he was worried the judge would send him back to jail.

Simply put, the attorney said he and the judge have a “different point of view” about things, like loyalty oaths and the pledge.

“I have a lot of respect for him,” Lampley said, “I’m just not going to back off on his.

“I don’t have to say it because I’m an American,” he said about the 31-word pledge. “I hope he’s not too angry with me.”

“It’s a problem, but it’s for the judge and me to work out.”

Yeah, different “points of view.” One based on the law, one not. Don’t blame Mr. Lampley for not taking on the judge. The man has to represent clients in that courthouse, and before that judge, for years to come. But that doesn’t mean the Mississippi Commission on Judicial Performance should let this slide. What did Judge Littlejohn have to say about the incident?

After the hearing, Littlejohn’s assistant said the judge had no comment on the matter.

Perhaps the decisions get better as the day goes on… You can read more here.

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So this woman was walking her dog in Belmont, Massachusetts when, according to her, a car came speeding by. What did she do? As reported in the Belmont Citizen-Herald:

According to a police report, an officer on Oct. 1 met with a Belmont man who stated he was driving down Stone Road the previous morning when an object came through his open window and hit him in the face. He soon realized the projectile was “a flying bag of dog feces that splattered across his face, and the remaining matter soiled the front of the car,” the report said.

The Juice’s first thought: Helluva shot! Second thought: If the car is going so fast, how does she pull that off? Backstory:

The day before, on Sept. 30, an officer was dispatched to Stone Road to take a report from a woman about a speeding complaint. The woman reported she was walking her dog down Stone Road and threw a bag at a dark-colored sedan that was allegedly speeding down Stone Road, almost hitting a person on a bicycle.

The woman told police she ran to hid in a neighboring yard after throwing the bag, which she admitted was filled with feces, because the vehicle remained in the area.

The charges?

… assault and battery with a dangerous weapon, vandalism to property and disorderly conduct …

Yes, a “dangerous weapon” … Click here to read more.

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Artistic license, as it relates to the Philippine national anthem and flag, is about to be seriously curtailed. After the Senate votes (it was 196-0 in the lower house – think it’ll pass?), improper singing of the national anthem – Lupang Hinirang (Beloved Land) – and unpatriotic displays of the Philippine flag will get you in some serious trouble. Per Reuters:

“Our Congress has given more teeth to government’s campaign to invigorate patriotism, respect and love of country by singing our anthem properly,” Representative Salvador Escudero, the bill’s principal author, told reporters.

He lamented that Filipino artists and singers had been changing the anthem’s military march melody and beat, and that the flag had been made into shirts and short pants.

If the Senate passes the law, the first approved by the lower house since the change of administrations in June, violators face up to two years in jail and a fine of 100,000 pesos ($2,280).

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Paul Ewing was certainly a stand-up guy to admit killing his neighbor’s plants with Roundup (in what has to be a unique way – see below). But was it really necessary to tell the police why he was mad at his neighbor? From The Bradenton Herald:

To get back at his neighbor for owing him money, Paul Ewing resorted to a series of drive-bys toting a water gun filled with Roundup weed killer, the Bradenton Police Department reports.

He told investigators that he was upset because his neighbor owed him more than $200 for drugs.

Brilliant!

The 35-year-old, who lives in the 100 block of 10th Street West, confessed to his actions after he was pulled over Thursday for driving with a suspended license.

In the front yard, Ewing gunned down flowers and bushes, the report stated. To get to the plants in the backyard, he filled water balloons with the weed killer and tossed them onto his neighbors property. Ewing estimated the landscaping damage to be about $250.

The Bradenton Police Department had been investigating the incidents that began May 1 and lasted until July 1.

Ewing was released from Manatee County jail Thursday after posting a $500 bond. He has been charged with criminal mischief with property damage.

Here’s the source.

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judge%20walton.gif Do not trifle with Judge Reggie Walton of the United States Court for the District of Columbia. He will let you have your say. Rest assured, though, that you’re going to hear what he has to say too. When 12 of Scooter Libby’s pals asked for the court’s permission to file a brief supporting Scooter, it was granted, but with this little cherry on top:

It is an impressive show of public service when twelve prominent and distinguished current and former law professors of well-respected schools are able to amass their collective wisdom in the course of only several days to provide their legal expertise to the Court on behalf of a criminal defendant. The Court trusts that this is a reflection of these eminent academics’ willingness in the future to step to the plate and provide like assistance in cases involving any of the numerous litigants, both in this Court and throughout the courts of our nation, who lack the financial means to fully and properly articulate the merits of their legal positions even in instances where failure to do so could result in monetary penalties, incarceration, or worse. The Court will certainly not hesitate to call for such assistance from these luminaries, as necessary in the interests of justice and equity, whenever similar questions arise in the cases that come before it.

Bam! The 12 gents are: Robert Bork, Alan Dershowitz [!] Vikram Amar, Randy Barnett, Viet Dinh, Douglas Kmiec, Gary Lawson, Earl Maltz, Thomas Merrill, Robert Nagel, Richard Parker, and Robert Pushaw.

You can read the order here. HT: The Next Hurrah

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Didn’t I just tell you not to tell me that? But no, you just couldn’t resist! As reported by news.com.au:

A robber wearing a transparent plastic bag over his head has held up a service station on the Gold Coast.

Pure genius.

Police said the man entered the BP service station at Labrador about 3.53pm yesterday wearing the plastic bag, and wielding a large carving knife, according to the Courier-Mail.

He approached the male attendant and demanded cash.

In response, the worker placed the money tray from the register on the counter and the robber helped himself.

At least someone was thinking clearly. (Get it!) Now this may surprise you, given the awesomeness of the disguise:

The worker was able to give police a good description of the bandit. He was described as about 170cm tall in his mid-20s and wearing three-quarter length denim shorts, a white T-shirt and a sky blue baseball cap.

And?

The man handed himself in to police today. Police expect to charge the man over the robbery.

This gent is up there with the wet bandits.