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When he was a kid, in addition to being a tool, this California elected official must have really sucked at baseball. Sadly, below you can see him taking it out on his stepson.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5Cp-vMQXX7I

You can read more about it here.

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Shouldn’t a grandfather know that his love for his grandchild is unconditional? You won’t believe why this grandpappy was displeased with his granddaughter. As reported by the Northwest Florida Daily News:

The Okaloosa County Sheriff’s Office was contacted May 31 by the victim’s adoptive mother, who said her daughter had been threatened by the victim’s biological grandfather.

The victim told deputies she’d been staying with her grandfather since May 26 and had asked him to drive her to a fast food restaurant so she could apply for a job. Her grandfather said he didn’t want her working there because she’d be working with African Americans.

Right. Like he said “I don’t want you working with African Americans.”

That prompted an argument between the two, and the victim said her grandfather threatened to “crack her skull” and “slit her from ear to ear.” The victim contacted her drill instructor and asked that he pick her up, as she feared for her safety.

The drill instructor said he picked her up but before leaving, the grandfather said in a serious tone he would kill her and “slit her ear to ear.” The drill instructor then drove her to her adoptive mother’s residence in Shalimar.

Not cool, pappy. Not cool. Older, but not wiser. We’re all one people. The charges?

The grandfather was charged with misdemeanor assault. His court date is June 26.

You’ll find the source here.

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Sure, it’s illegal. But can it possibly be that this is a judicious use of police manpower? Unlikely. As reported by The Morning Call (Lehigh Valley, PA):

A detective from the Monroe County district attorney’s office made arrangements to meet Brian K. Ryder Friday after reading his ad on Craigslist from a male seeking a female to “smoke with.” The ad read, “Any females into 420? It’s nice out. Let’s go smoke. Email if interested.”

Investigators made arrangements to meet Ryder at the Stroud Mall on Route 611, but Detective Joseph Coddington pulled him over in his pickup truck prior to arriving at the mall. Ryder was charged with possession with intent to delivery marijuana, possession of a small amount of marijuana and possession of drug paraphernalia. He also was cited for having an expired inspection on his truck.

Yes, that’s him. [The photo is from the Monroe County District Attorney’s office.] Dude looks like he’s thinking “Really? You did all that for this?” Here’s the source.

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Be honest. You’ve smacked or kicked a machine – a parking meter, a vending machine, a copier … But this guy took it to another level. Per The Salt Lake Tribune:

A Salt Lake City mortgage company employee allegedly got drunk, opened fired on his firm’s computer server with a .45-caliber automatic, and then told police someone had stolen his gun and caused the damage.

Maybe he didn’t do it?

Salt Lake County prosecutors say Campbell called police late on Aug. 12, claiming a man had stolen his gun and fired into the $100,000 computer server owned by RANLife Home Loans, located at 268 W. 400 South.

A probable cause statement alleges that Campbell told police he had been “mugged, assaulted with his own firearm and drugged” by a mystery assailant.

So don’t be so quick to judge. Wait, something is coming in over the wire …

… acquaintances of Campbell reportedly told police he had earlier been drunk, was armed and had threatened to shoot the computer and maybe himself.

Doh! Of note: “acquaintances” not “friends.” The charges?

… criminal mischief, a second-degree felony; carrying a dangerous weapon while under the influence and providing false information to police, both Class B misdemeanors; and public intoxication, a Class C misdemeanor.

No word on whether the server will make it …

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The cops have you red-handed, with the evidence right there in front of you. So what do you do?
Here’s an option you might not have considered. As reported by the Hunterdon County Democrat (New Jersey):

On Thursday, June 1, at about 1:55 a.m., Patrolman Joseph SanGiovanni saw a 2012 Nissan Maxima driven by LaQuan Mayes, 38, of Newark, allegedly fail to stop at a red light on Route 22.

Upon stopping the car, Patrolman SanGiovanni smelled raw marijuana inside the vehicle and saw a dime bag of marijuana in plain view inside of the cup-holder in the center console, police said. When the patrolman requested that Mayes hand over the bag, Mayes picked it up and ate it.

Gulp. “Bag? What bag?”

A consensual search of Mayes’ car did not turn up any additional contraband.

Free to go? Not exactly.

Mayes was charged with possession of less than 50 grams of marijuana, obstruction of justice, failure to make lawful disposition of a controlled dangerous substance, driving while in possession of a CDS and failure to observe a traffic signal. He was released on his own recognizance.

What? You released him? And the evidence? Here’s the source.

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After reading this post, you will agree that no man will EVER mess with this woman. Hell, no man will even get within grabbing distance of her. Warning to male Juice readers: you may feel this man’s pain. As reported by wbtv.com:

Police in Shelby [North Carolina] say they arrested a woman over the weekend after she squeezed a man’s testicles out of his scrotum.

Joyce Maxine Gregory, 35, is charged with malicious castration and assault inflicting serious bodily injury, according to Shelby Police Chief Jeff Ledford.

YEOW! But why?

Police say Gregory got into an argument with an older man Saturday morning. When he went outside to call 911 she followed him and grabbed his scrotum.

The man ran to a nearby rescue squad building for help.

How could you possibly run after that? As for the perp …

Police were sent to the residence on Bowman Street to arrest Gregory. When she was placed in the patrol car, she pulled down her pants and urinated in the backseat.

Nice touch, right? You’ll find the source here, including a mug shot.

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Sure, some people don’t get along with their in-laws. And some parents don’t get along with their kids’ spouses. But this? A whole ‘nother level, as reported in The Las Cruces Sun-News:

A 44-year-old woman who allegedly ripped her daughter-in-law’s nipple off during a drunken argument could be facing criminal charges, the 3rd Judicial District Attorney’s Office confirmed Wednesday.

Ouch, ouch, ouch!

It’s believed to be the first time a local victim has suffered a body part being torn from them, said Chief Deputy District Attorney Amy Orlando.

Ya think?

The victim told officers she, her husband, his mother and one of her husband’s friends had spent Saturday night drinking …

Wait, alcohol was involved?

Sometime after 3 a.m., the victim’s husband had started arguing with his mother, and because it was becoming “very intense,” the victim went to stand in between the two to separate them.

Uh-oh.

When the victim began arguing with her 44-year-old mother-in-law, the older woman allegedly “grabbed (the victim’s) right breast and began to squeeze and pull on her nipple.” The victim yelled to stop, but her mother-in-law allegedly continued to pull until the younger woman began punching her in the face, according to the police report.

The victim then told police she threw her mother-in-law into the yard, but the older woman allegedly kicked in the back door and had to be physically removed again. It was when the victim was putting her mother-in-law’s belongings in the yard that she felt fluid on her breast and realized there was blood on her shirt.

When she untucked her tank top, her nipple fell on the floor, she told police.

YEOW! Can you fix that? …

… doctors were already in the process of reattaching the nipple to the 30-year-old victim’s breast [when Las Cruces police officers responded to Memorial Medical Center on Sunday morning].

Whew.

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The love that siblings have for each other is special. Of course, that doesn’t apply if they have no love for each other. In those cases, the feelings they have for each other can be “special” too. As reported by The Oregonian:

Don Fred Stoll [age 58] is accused of using a hatchet to attack and injure his 60-year-old brother, Russell Stoll, according to Milwaukie [Oregon] police.

Yes, that there’s the hatchet above (from the Milwaukie Police Department). This next bit is truly going to shock you.

Investigators say alcohol was a factor in the fight.

No! Alcohol? Who would have even suspected that? Not to worry, though.

Russell Stoll had injuries that were not life-threatening, and he was treated at Providence Milwaukie Hospital.

As for his little brother …

Don Fred Stoll was arrested and taken to the Clackamas County jail. He is charged with second degree assault and unlawful use of a weapon.

Not cool, Donny. Not cool. Here’s the source.

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Perhaps the thief was so excited about nearly completing his mission, that he forgot to steal the charger! As reported by The Daily Mail:

A gold-plated vibrator has been stolen from a luxury sex shop in Brazil after an armed raider stormed into the shop and demanded staff hand over the item.

Police say the man walked into the Brasilia store, tied up the sales assistant and then took the 18-carat gold sex toy from the display case. He left without taking anything else. The sex toy sells for $4,000, or £2,600.

Store owner Vanessa Baldini, told the G1 news website, the robber might not get any satisfaction from Wednesday’s theft.

Why not?

… the robber didn’t take the charger for the sex toy.

Doh! And if you’re thinking perhaps he did it for the gold plating …

[The store owner] said the Swedish-made vibrator has a stainless steel core, making removing any gold plating extremely difficult.

A few days later … Um, excuse me. Do you sell chargers separately? … Here’s the source, with a photo of the spoils.

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Who knew a couple mankinis would cause such a fuss? As reported by the BBC:

Two students who dressed up as the TV character Borat are at the centre of a row in Vietnam.

The pair performed a dance act at a company party dressed as the spoof Kazakh journalist in his notoriously skimpy “mankini” swimming costume.

They have now found themselves suspended from college for 12 months.

The incident, dubbed the “nude dance of FPT Arena students”, has stirred up a storm on internet forums and also in the domestic media.

The leading technology firm FPT owns the college where the two performers were studying design.

In a statement, FPT Arena said the organisers of the party did not know about the act in advance, adding that two of the firm’s executives had been sacked over the incident.

Hanoi Cultural Inspectorate on Tuesday fined the college 4m dong ($240; £135) for a number of offences including “use of improper clothing”.

You can read more here.