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Then high-school junior Amy Doninger was ticked off that the battle of the bands (Jamfest) was cancelled. So, at home, on her own blog, she posted an entry stating that

Jamfest is canceled due to the douchbags in central office.

As events unfolded, it turns out her characterization was pretty accurate. Her punishment? She was told to apologize to the school superintendent, show her mom the blog entry, and withdraw her candidacy for Class Secretary (an office she held since entering high school). She agreed to the first two, but would not withdraw from the race. So the school refused to let her run (she would have won as a write-in candidate, but the votes were ignored!), and she filed suit, claiming that the school violated her right to free speech.

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Peeping Tom Dennis Sanders did his time (for secretly videotaping a woman and a teenage girl in their bedrooms and bathrooms), now he wants his porn back! When he was busted in San Rafael, California in 2002, in addition to seizing the illegal materials, police also seized 500 legal porn videos, and 250 legal magazines. Sanders, who was just released, asked for his collection back. Nope, said the police. So Sanders lawyered up, and sued the city. According to his lawyer, the videotapes alone are worth more than $10,000. Sweet fancy moses! The Judge said he would have to review each tape in Chambers before making a decision. Okay, I made that last part up. The matter is currently pending in the Marin County Superior Court.

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Cab Driver Tewfik Boukhelal jumped out of his cab – while it was moving! This was not okay with his two passengers, especially the one who was knocked unconscious as she too jumped out of the moving cab. Why did he do this? Because Mr. Boukhelal thought the passengers (1) had released a substance, and (2) were going to steal from him. Say what? I’m having a really hard time reconciling these thoughts. Headache coming. (See below.)

The Judge hearing the case remarked that it was “the most bizarre case of dangerous driving” he’d ever seen. The penalty? No more driving for Mr. Boukhelal, at least for the next 18 months. He was also put on probation for 12 months, given 160 hours of community service, and must retake the driving test. No worries, though. He found a new job as a translator. You will find the rest of the story here.

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Kathleen Jennings, age 19, is getting hosed. This young lady is no reprobate. She is a Cub Scout leader who works with disabled children! And she is an A student, and is studying math at Manchester University. She’s never been in any trouble before. She is now, and here’s why: While riding the train, she put the tips of her flip-flops on the unoccupied seat in front of her. Said the big bad railway man: “Are you comfortable?” She immediately put her feet down. Not good enough.

Ms. Jennings was charged with “wilfully interfering with the comfort or convenience” of other rail passengers. Actually, I’d say that’s what the railway man did. Just to reinforce the kind of young lady we’re talking about, this was her reaction upon being charged:

I was crying my eyes out. I am not the sort of person who would do anything wrong. I have never been in trouble before and, working with children, I do not want a criminal record.

She will have to pay an attorney, and could face a fine of up to £150 ($300 US). Brilliant!

And Ms. Jennings is not alone. Since the “no feet on the seats” policy was implemented in February 2007, the company operating the trains, Merseyrail, has taken about 250 people to court! Mercy! (You can read more here.) And if you want to read about another scofflaw who was busted under this 120-year-old rule, click here.

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Her name isn’t “Fannie.” It just sounds better than “Fudge Shop Catherine.” Ms. Catherine Delgado recently moved to Maryland from Massachusetts with her 2 and 4 year old kids. Per her attorney, last month her boyfriend was charged with beating her and fracturing her eye socket. So things weren’t going real well for Ms. Delgado. Maybe that’s the reason for what happened next.

cadbury.jpg According to the police in Annpolis, Maryland (and the survellance footage, doh!), Ms. Delgado broke into Uncle Bob’s Fudge Kitchen (located on “Main Street” of course) and stole $89 in fudge. She was busted soon thereafter when a police officer saw large bricks of chocolate in her purse. And what did Ms. Delgado do then? Obviously, she tried to flush it down the toilet (really). You can imagaine how that went down. (sorry)

So she was arrested, and held on $100,000 bond! She had been in jail for 28 days when she appeared before Judge McKenna. Said the Judge to Assistant State’s Attorney Carolynn Grammas:

I’m underwhelmed. Do you suspect she is part of a chocolate stealing ring or something?

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Kuo Rong-hui has done a lot of jail time. There’s only one problem – he’s not a criminal! So why would Kuo plead guilty, numerous times, to all these crimes? And then serve jail time for the crimes? In two words, money and hemophelia. See, Kuo would take the fall for payoffs from the real perps. Then, once in jail, he would reveal that he is a hemopheliac, and the authorities would release him! Seems the prisons didn’t want to pay the $1,800 in meds required to treat Kuo’s hemophelia.

donate_blood_lg_nwm.gifThe scheme unraveled when Kuo tried to take the hit for a co-defendant, and the Judge became suspicious. Interesting career path, huh? You can read more here.

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Angry_judge2.gif No offense to all of you prison guards, but wouldn’t you prefer to be a judge, making twice as much, and being in charge? Allan C. Berkhimer was a Cambria County, Pennsylvania Judge from 1988 until he was canned in June 2005. Now he’s a corrections officer trainee. What were the charges that led the Court of Judicial Discipline to can him? As reported in The Tribune Democrat:

The state Judicial Conduct Board, which prosecuted the misconduct charges, said Berkhimer routinely used vulgar and sexually suggestive language in conversations with women who worked for him.

On several occasions, he summoned them into his office to show them computer images of naked women, the board said.

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If you are Matthew Dietrich of Berks County, Pennsylvania, you are PISSED! You just paid Christopher Katz $500 for a pound of marijuana. But when you open the bag – BROCCOLI! So what do you do? Kick his ass? Just leave? Not Mr. Dietrich. He was going to get the last laugh. Or was he? (Cue the creepy, mysterious laugh.) Young Mr. Dietrich called 911, joining the brotherhood of really stupid criminals. He told the police that he was beaten up and robbed by Mr. Katz, who then joined the brotherhood too, telling the police about the failed drug deal. Said Lansdale police Sgt. Robert McDyre:

It is bizarre, isn’t it? ‘You’d think [Dietrich would] just say, ‘I can’t believe I’m that stupid’ and leave.

 

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Only in New York? No, Juice readers know that weird things happen pretty much everywhere (see the 200+ archived Legal Juice posts). Back to New York. A robber (with a knife) in Westchester robbed an 18-year-old – but not of the $10 the young man had. Said Captain Joseph DeCarlo:

He tells the kid to go into the pizza parlor and get change. Then the kid comes out, he takes his $4 and he leaves.

Shazam!

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Due to popular demand (okay, by me), Legal Juice now features an e-mail subscription option. On the home page, on the right, just enter your e-mail address in the “Subscribe by Email” box. You’ll then get an e-mail each day with a few sentences about (and a link to) each day’s entry.

Submissions! If you have a submission for Legal Juice, please send it to me via the “Suggest A Story” box on the right side of the home page. Let me know if you want props in the post, or if you wish to remain anonymous.

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