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Remember the neighborhood kid who used to stick a firecracker in a tadpole’s mouth and light it? Or the kid who smeared lightning bugs on each fingernail and proudly held up his hands? No? (And no, it wasn’t me! He lived in my neighborhood, and his name is …) Anyway, that kid would have felt right at home at the annual fiesta in Sagunto, Spain. The fiesta featured one strange tradition. In honor of the local patron saint, revellers would fight over specially-bred ducks that have had their wings clipped and can’t fly. Guess what happens to the ducks? They are torn to pieces, literally. The Supreme Court has banned the tradition, calling it a “bloody spectacle.” You can read more (not much) here.

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Darren Mirren, age 16, had an interview scheduled with a commercial cleaning company. He didn’t show. When they called him, he said he didn’t know how to find the office. So they rescheduled the interview. Again he didn’t show. Prepare yourself for this: He didn’t get the job! OMG. Can you believe it? So, naturally, Darren … sued! He filed an age discrimination claim with the Employment Tribunal in Glasgow, Scotland. And he … lost. How is Darren taking it? As reported by The Scotsman:

Last night the teenager, who is still unemployed, was adamant he was in the right. “It wasn’t my fault. I was unable to get there because they didn’t give me any directions.

” “I felt it was discrimination because of my age.”

First, UFB. And second, I am just shocked that he hasn’t yet found a job. Here’s the source.

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What do you do when your kid steps in poop? Here’s what one woman did, as reported by UPI:

[Norwalk, Connecticut] City Attorney M. Jeffry Spahr said Kelly DeBrocky of Mahopac, N.Y., filed suit against the city April 7, seeking $100 compensation for her child’s ruined shoes and tickets for Maritime Aquarium — which the mother said her family had to leave early because of the incident — The (Stamford, Conn.) Advocate reported Thursday.

“I had to read it twice,” Spahr said. “Immediately, what I did was say, ‘You’re not going to believe this one.’ It was hilarious. What are these people thinking about? Just when you think you’ve heard it all.”

DeBrocky defended he suit. “I was just really skeeved, I thought the whole thing was disgusting,” she said. “We had to pay for admission to the aquarium and my son had no shoes and it made the entire experience awful.”

“The official response is her claim is denied and poop happens,” said Spahr.

“Poop happens?” Just based on their comments – mom was “skeeved” – you almost have to go with poop shoes mom. Almost.

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Kids, if you’re not ready for the test, do NOT go down this road. As reported by Northland’s News Center:

A school in Duluth received quite the scare Monday.

Around noon, the Nettleton Magnet School was evacuated after a 911 call claimed that someone was shot on the campus.

“It was apparent that within several minutes or so that it appeared no one was injured no students were injured a teacher was not shot so the investigation is ongoing at this point.” Assistant Duluth Superintendent Joe Hill says parents were kept in the loop in regards to what had happened. “We are utilizing the districts communication plan right now to get the call out to parents students will be going home with letters explaining the situation as well.”

The students were eventually let back in to the school.

The Duluth Police department is still conducting an investigation into the prank call.

Be scared, prankster. Be very scared.

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Two friends, Robert John (age 20) and Carl Thorpe (age 26) ran into each other in town. They had a few drinks and returned to Mr. Thorpe’s apartment to watch a DVD “featuring football [soccer] hooligans,” as reported by the BBC.

[The DVD] featured footage of fans biting each other.

Can you guess what happened next?

Suddenly John punched Mr Thorpe to the floor before punching him again up to 20 times and then biting off all of his left ear – complete with ear ring.

Owwwwwwwwwwww! And about that ear …

John had put the ear inside a plastic bag and hidden it amongst ivy growing on a wall.

But by the time he admitted it to police it was too late for doctors to do anything with it.

Oh, and Mr. John also stole some of Mr. Thorpe’s things, then locked him in his own apartment. The Judge was feeling Mr. Thorpe’s pain.

“You literally ripped off his ear with your teeth. That is akin to using them as a weapon… Taking the ear with you was bizarre.”

And very uncool. Mr. Johns received a 5-year sentence. Here’s the source.

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This takes BFF to a whole nother level. As reported by WKBW – TV in Buffalo, New York:

City of Tonawanda Police tell us of a most bizarre scene on Longs Avenue early Monday morning.

It started with a call to law enforcement, after Longs Avenue Resident Jenny Stickles reported her car stolen. Once officers arrived and started taking a report, her son, 25-year-old Elisha Stickles and his friend, 23-year-old David Goss arrived back home with the car.

The men told police they took the car because they had to rush their friend to the hospital, but the officer on duty thought something with the boy’s story didn’t add up. After investigating further, the officer found blood on the floor in the basement. The men later admitted to cutting their fingers and told police they burned a picture of the virgin mary inside their hands as part of a bonding ritual.

“He’s hanging around with the wrong kids,” said Elisha’s Mother Jenny Stickles. “I never heard of someone doing something like that, never in my life.”

Both Stickles and Goss are now charged with falsely reporting an incident.

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A motorized barstool! Think about it. You hop on it at home, drive right into (and up to) the bar, down a few, then drive back home. Brilliant! The proud owner, Kile Wygle, said it can go 38 mph! Luckily for him, he was “only” going 20 mph when he crashed. Unluckily, he was busted for “driving” under the influence (and with a suspended license!). And, as reported by News Talk 610 WTVN:

Wygle was treated for minor injuries at Licking Memorial Hospital where he joked with Trotter about drinking 15 beers before the crash. He refused the blood-alcohol test.

Click here to see a picture of the stoolmobile.

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Criminals don’t always make the best decisions. Here’s an excellent example, as reported by the South Asian Post:

Angry villagers in eastern India [Jharkhand] burned eight robbers and beat four others to death, police said. About 20 robbers raided a remote village in Jharkhand state, but were surrounded by hundreds of villagers, who began chasing them, the police said. “Four were beaten to death, while eight took shelter in a house, which was set on fire by the villagers,” Mohamed Nehal, a senior police officer, said. Armed villagers stood guard to ensure none of the robbers escaped.

Yikes. Some vigilante justice, a lot of deterrence …