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If this dude is a sports fan, here’s guessing that his favorite cliche is the one about running a successful play over and over until the opposing team stops it. Now, It may be useful in sports, but in crime? Not so much. Especially crimes against property … As reported in The Spectator [Hamilton, Ontario]:

Police had staked out a Subway restaurant on Lake Street Tuesday that’s been robbed three times before, when a man robbed the Esso gas bar next door at Scott Street.

The suspect was nabbed with the cash running from the gas bar. Turns out, detectives say the man is the same one who’s hit the Subway so often.

A 38-year-old St. Catharines man has been charged with four counts of robbery and was scheduled to appear in St. Catharines court Wednesday.

In his defense, at least it was a neighboring establishment … You can find the source here.

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If you have a son, or know someone who has a son, or have even a tenuous connection to popular culture, then you know how many young males play Xbox LIVE. (It allows gamers to play with other gamers, online, and to talk with each other.) So, why did The Juice warn you not to let your son read this? As reported by wbaltv.com:

Police said a California woman was arrested Friday after she allegedly befriended a 13-year-old Maryland boy on the Internet and traveled to his home to have sex.

Rachel Ann Hicks, 36, of Lake Forest, was arrested Friday by Orange County Sheriff’s investigators on suspicion of child molestation and rape.

Hicks and the teen initially met in September on an X-box Live chat room, police said. The online relationship progressed to phone calls, texting, e-mails and sexually explicit images and movies between one another, according to a police news release.

Hicks allegedly told the boy she was 23 years old. Police said she flew to Maryland and met him at his home, where they engaged in sexual intercourse on Thanksgiving.

Couldn’t find any gamers in the most populous state in the nation? Well …

Hicks admitted to having sex with another minor male victim in California, police said.

The charges?

Hicks was charged with two counts of rape, one count of a second-degree sex offense and one count of sexual solicitation of a minor.


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The Juice is confident this kid wishes he was just playing with matches and burned himself. Why? Because, while playing with a gun, he shot himself in the … As reported by The Orlando Sentinel:

An Orlando teen begged police to call an ambulance late Saturday after shooting himself in the testicles, according to police reports.

“I shot myself by accident,” the 17-year-old boy said. “Get an ambulance.”

Yikes. And how exactly did you do that?

The unidentified teenager was lying on his bed, watching TV and playing with a 9 mm. pistol about 8:30 p.m. when it fired. “I was trying to tie the gun around my leg,” he said, describing the accidental discharge to officers.

While it was loaded? Dude! Adding insult to – ouch! – injury:

The police department is recommending that the Orange-Osceola State Attorney’s Office charge the victim with unlawful possession of a firearm by a minor and unlawful discharge of a firearm.

Here’s the source.

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Under virtually any scenario, this lady would have gotten away with stealing (not borrowing – she didn’t return it) a neighbor’s shovel to dig out her car after the Chicago snowstorm. Unfortunately for her, the gent she stole the shovel from is in the video equipment business (think “surveillance cameras” – lots of them). So, having reviewed his footage and having seen it all go down, as you can below, he got his revenge (also included in the clip below).


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judge%20leave%20out%20of%20courtroom%20gavel%20funny.gif Regular Juice readers may recall that this will not be the first post involving a Motion to Continue a trial due to … a football game! I’m sure it won’t be the last, unfortunately.

And just in case you think that maybe The Juice just doesn’t like football … He was spotted at 3 Super Bowls over the years, coincidentally all involving the Redskins … Furthermore, he was spotted at almost every home Redskins game from 1967 until that painful day in December 1996 (notwithstanding the thrashing of the Cowboys) when the curtains closed at RFK.

Having established his bona fides, let’s just say it’s not a motion The Juice would ever file (not that there’s anything wrong with it …) Think the judge granted it? Yup, he did. Click here to read the Motion.

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Football%20flying%20fly%20throw%20throwing%20air.jpg No! I told you not to tell me that! As reported by The Cincinnati Enquirer:

The 88-year-old Blue Ash woman arrested after refusing to give a 13-year-old neighborhood boy his football back after it landed in her yard has sued the youth’s parents, alleging emotional distress.

Don’t laugh. This is serious stuff.

The suit contends that members of the Tanis household “have thrown objects against the side of Ms. Jester’s house, into her gardens and onto her porch.”

The Tanises and their minor children “regularly and without permission” enter Jester’s yard to retrieve footballs and other play items that have been “carelessly tossed” onto her property, the suit adds.

See what I mean? Very serious stuff. Oh, the pain! This is exactly the kind of case a personal injury lawyer hates to see.

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He did! Listen to the 911 call [above]. So what happened after the call? As reported by The Hartford Courant:

Dispatchers traced the call to 192 Waterville Road, the home of Robert J. Michelson.

He told narcotics officers who visited his home that he had spent a lot of money online buying everything he needed to grow marijuana. He had one small plant at home, along with seeds and equipment for growing, police said.

Michelson also had drug paraphernalia for personal use.

If this was an attempted candor pander, it failed.

He was charged with possession of drug paraphernalia, illegal cultivation of marijuana, possession of a controlled substance and possession of drug paraphernalia in a drug factory.

Michelson was brought to Farmington police headquarters where he was released on $5,000 bond. Police said he was cooperative with officers, but made an obscene gesture at the dispatchers.

Yeah, it was all the dispatcher’s fault. Here’s the source.


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Just remember that you heard it here first: If you call a spade a spade, it’s a spade for certain purposes if you think it is, even if it’s really not. Confused? So, most likely, are the New York women who are referred to as “prostitutes” by Johnny Law because a man thought they were (they weren’t). As reported in North County Now (New York):

Robert E. Millar, 60, offered two females money in exchange for sex Monday morning at about 10:15, troopers said, and squeezed the buttocks of one of the females.

Millar has been charged with two counts of patronizing a prostitute and one count of forcible touching. The females were not prostitutes and did not accept any money, and state police explained that the law uses the word “prostitute” for anyone who is solicited to engage in sexual conduct.

Feel better ladies? Didn’t think so. Here’s the source.

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How would you like your books today – with syrup, catchup, or mayonnaise? A library in Boise, Idaho had a real problem because someone kept dumping condiments in the book-drop. The perp was finally caught after a surveillance system was installed. And yes, she did get jail time. Why did she do it? She was retaliating against the library for being banned from entering it. As reported by The Idaho Statesman:

Joy L. Cassidy was taken away in handcuffs Friday after pleading guilty to misdemeanor malicious injury to property.

The special prosecutor hadn’t pushed for jail time, and Cassidy’s attorney said she needed weekly counseling that had helped her with anger-management and other issues.

But Judge Kevin Swain sentenced her to serve at least 27 days in jail. “Judge Swain sent a message today that people who engage in the kind of conduct that Ms. Cassidy engaged in will not be tolerated,” said Special Prosecutor Tim Fleming of the Canyon County Prosecutor’s Office. “You’re going to go to jail.”

Cassidy’s sentencing was the final chapter in one of the more bizarre crimes in Boise in recent years. When she was arrested after dumping syrup, ketchup and mayonnaise into a library book-drop, many wondered what her motive was — other than to destroy public property and create a gooey mess.

It came out in court on Friday that Cassidy, 75, was retaliating for being banned from the Ada Community Library in 2007 because of conflicts she’d had with the staff and other patrons.

“The library was the one place that she went in a social setting where she had contact with people,” Cassidy’s attorney, Gabriel McCarthy, told Judge Swain. “It broke her heart when she couldn’t go back. And it’s something she couldn’t let go.”

In spring 2009, Cassidy dumped maple syrup in the box, the first of more than 10 acts of vandalism over the course of the next year, according to police and library officials. The library spent about $1,000 on a surveillance system to finally catch her.

10+? That’s a serious grudge. You can read more (a fair amount) here.

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If this dude decides to remain in the relationship, he would be well-advised to have a pack of cigarettes on hand at all times, and be willing to share them. As reported by The Morning Call (Allentown):

Bethlehem police said a woman went on a rampage Monday night when her boyfriend denied her a cigarette and attacked him with a steak knife.

Linda Sellers, 55, is charged with aggravated assault with a deadly weapon, simple assault, reckless endangerment, terroristic threats, harassment and possessing an instrument of crime. Sellers, of 714 Hayes St., is in Northampton County Prison under $750,000 bail.

Yikes. Here’s the official police version:

Officers were called to the home for a report of a woman yelling. Sellers answered the door and said, “Oh, good. It’s the (expletive) police!”

Police said Sellers pointed to Camilleri, who was sitting on the couch holding a steak knife he had wrestled away from her, and told the officer she was going to kill him.

Camilleri told police he was sleeping on the couch when Sellers awoke him and asked for a cigarette. When he told her to buy her own, police said Sellers threw items around the apartment and overturned a glass coffee table.

Sellers went into the kitchen, grabbed a steak knife and attacked Camilleri, police said. He suffered three cuts on the top of his head and was treated and released from St. Luke’s Hospital-Fountain Hill, police said.

Here’s the source.