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What kind of person would rough up a swan? Well, this kind of person, as reported by myfoxorlando.com:

A man is behind bars after police say he roughed up a swan. John Wynne is accused of grabbing a swan by the neck from Lake Eola. Orlando Police arrested him for animal cruelty and grand theft. He is being held in the Orange County Jail on $1,000.00 bond.

Totally uncool.

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The Juice has not had a “booth” dance (uh, yeah, sure, right), but he can’t believe a stripper would give one without getting the cashish first. Well this stripper did, unfortunately for all parties concerned. As reported by cnews.canoe.ca:

A stripper will spend the next nine months in jail for smashing a beer bottle over the head of a customer who refused to pay her. Tamara Valcourt was sentenced this week for the Dec. 1 attack at the Chez Venus bar.

Crown prosecutor Julie Gagne said Valcourt attacked the man as he was leaving the strip club without paying the $100 he owed for a booth dance.

“The defendant struck the victim with a beer bottle,” said Gagne. “(He was hit) behind the ear and suffered a deep, four-centimetre cut.”

The Crown and the defence [she pleaded guilty] agreed that Valcourt should serve an additional nine months on top of the 36 days already served. She was also slapped with two years’ probation and has been barred from the Venus club.

Any priors? Well …

The judge took into account the stripper’s prior criminal record that included convictions for obstructing police in 2006 and assault in 2007.

Yikes. Here’s the source.

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Just to be clear, we’re talking about using chalk to write on the sidewalk. In Orlando, that can land you in jail. Really. Just ask Timothy Osmar. As reported by The Orlando Sentinel:

Just before Christmas, OPD [Orlando Police Department] arrested 25-year-old Timothy Osmar for “writing or painting advertising matter on streets or sidewalks”

The criminal “advertising” in question? Slogans like “Justice Equals Liberty.”

Advertisting? Really? UFB, as is this …

As of Friday, Osmar was still in jail ..

Through Christmas and New Year’s! Mayor Dyer?

Dyer’s office was unapologetic, saying city codes clearly outlaw chalk writing.

Please, tell me this guy isn’t a lawyer. You can read more (a fair amount) here.

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Even for those who believe in Karma, The Juice doubts you think it’s this instantaneous. How instantaneous? Check out this dude who tried to skip out on his bar tab, as reported by www.phillyburbs.com:

Police said the man, who may be from Honduras, was asked to leave the Sandbar [in New Hope, Pennsylvania] shortly after 6 p.m. Saturday. He was handed his bill and asked to pay, but after receiving the bill ran out the back door, police said. He fled across Waterloo Street and somehow fell over a wall onto water covered rocks below.

The man, whose name was not released Saturday night, was pulled from an area of the shoreline not easily accessible from above by a team of firefighters aboard a rescue boat. He was brought to shore and taken to St. Mary Medical Center in Middletown.

Do you believe?

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Hmmm. The Juice was working on this post and thought this name sounded familiar, so he checked the archives of 1,854 Legal Juice posts and found this one about Judge Willie F. Singletary. The story on philly.com was now not so surprising.

The state Supreme Court yesterday canned Philadelphia Traffic Court Judge Willie F. Singletary, suspending him without pay after he allegedly showed a woman cellphone pictures of his genitalia two weeks ago.


But this isn’t the first time Singletary has made headlines. In 2007 his driver’s license was suspended for unpaid tickets [a BOATLOAD of them – see Juice post above], and two years later he was reprimanded for promising favors in exchange for campaign donations.

That’s quite a record in just the past 5 years.

Yesterday, the Supreme Court ordered that Singletary be “relieved of any and all judicial and administrative responsibilities as a judge of the Philadelphia Traffic Court.”

Might consider another line of work.

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Is it just me, or does “Friday” evoke positive thoughts for you too? For most folks, it’s the end of the work week, and the beginning of the weekend. Well sir, an Italian court took a different view of “Friday.” As reported by the BBC News:

Italy’s top court has banned a couple from naming their son Venerdi (Friday), saying such a “ridiculous” name could expose the boy to mockery.

That’s not all, though.

The judges also ordered that the boy be renamed Gregorio – after the saint’s day on which he was born.

What the hell is going on in Italy? Do you think the parent should appeal? This was the appeal!

The Cassation Court upheld earlier rulings by lower courts that Friday was too reminiscent of the name of Robinson Crusoe’s native servant in the classic shipwreck novel.

And what’s up with my Italian brethren?

Gian Ettore Gassani of the Italian Association of Matrimonial Lawyers backed the ruling.

Not cool. Here’s the source.

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We’re not talking about texting here. We’re talking about kissing. As reported by the Arab Times:

Police [in Kuwait City] have arrested an unidentified couple for committing immoral act inside a car.
It has been reported a police patrol was passing by and saw the couple in an embrace. They were kissing each other and were not even aware that a police patrol was driving in their direction.

Kissing! Oh the humanity!

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You can never be sure how someone is going to handle being insulted. No doubt this gent’s insulting days are over. As reported in The Daily Herald (Everett, Washington), according to court papers:

[Dallas Amber] Smith [18] and others were gathered at her ex-boyfriend’s home south of Monroe, watching a movie and drinking.

She boasted to party-goers that she was good at doing back flips and that she could do one off anything, court papers said.

A man, 19, challenged her to do a flip off the deck. Smith took off her shoes and attempted the maneuver. She couldn’t do it. That’s when the man laughed at her and told her that her feet smelled, [deputy prosecutor] Albert wrote.

Smith started to playfully wrestle with the man, rubbing her socks in his face. She started hitting him. After several seconds, he pushed her away, Albert wrote.

It’s a little weird, right? Check this out.

She grabbed her coat, picked up a steak knife and headed for the door. On the way, Smith walked up to the man and stabbed him in the back, court papers said.

The man and others called 911. A sheriff’s deputy found the man sitting on porch with the knife sticking out of his back, the blade buried a few inches in. His lung had collapsed from the stabbing.

Sticking out of his back! Someone is a wee bit oversensitive. The prognosis?

The man is expected to recover from the injury.

Whew. What did Ms. Smith have to say for her feet … er, herself?

Police arrested Smith at her parents’ home. She denied knowing about any stabbing and declined to speak with investigators.

Perhaps it’s a little late for the denial …

A witness told police that Smith came to his house that night and told him that she had hurt someone and she was in trouble. She told him someone had taunted her.

Doh! Here’s the source.

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So the cops caught these guys with a cell phone they had already thrown away? How’s that possible? Well, as reported by the Volusia County [Florida] Sheriff’s Office:

A 66-year-old woman had gone to the store Saturday afternoon and when she returned to her Saxon Boulevard home she discovered that someone had smashed a back window and gotten inside. When deputies responded, jewelry, a laptop computer and a cell phone were discovered missing. The victim used a cell phone locator service to get the general area the phone was in.

How did the police get from the “general area” of the phone to the perps?

After calling the phone several times, it was finally found ringing in a garbage can in front of a Baton Drive house at about 11:47 p.m. Deputies then looked around for any other evidence.

Voices coming from the yard on one side of the house led a deputy to two men hiding behind a tree: 20-year-old Gabriel Hidalgo and 21-year-old Heriberto Hidalgo. Both men initially made up stories about what they were doing in the area, but once stolen jewelry and a handgun were found on them they admitted to the home burglaries. The jewelry they had came from the Saxon Boulevard break-in and two handguns were traced back to a Friday burglary on Tivoli Drive.

Doh! Not only did they leave the phone on, they tossed it in a garbage can right where they were! [Their house?]

Both Deltona men were charged with carrying a concealed weapon, loitering/prowling, burglary, armed burglary, three counts of grand theft and criminal mischief. Heriberto Hidalgo was also charged with giving false identification to law enforcement and possession of narcotics paraphernalia. He also had a Seminole County arrest warrant for failure to appear.


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Tired of the same old billboards? You wouldn’t be, if you were in Sweden. Some Swedish legislators were upset by mobile billboard ads for strip joints. Per The Local:

“It’s degrading to continually be confronted with cars whose main purpose is to drive around Stockholm’s streets in the evenings – with naked women as the focal point – serving as advertisements for strip clubs,” wrote Sylvia Lindgren and Veronica Palm ….

“Motor-borne advertisements for strip clubs are definitely not in line with an egalitarian view of people. It’s a degrading view of women and sends the wrong signals, especially to children, young people, tourists, and others who find themselves in the public spaces of our streets and city squares.”

So they “introduced a motion that would have required permits for vehicles used to tow billboards through city streets.” What do you think? Did it pass? Nope. And …

As a result, Stockholm’s strip clubs are free to continue sending trucks and trailers rolling down the city’s streets featuring scantily clad women in seductive poses in an attempt to lure customers to their clubs.

The floodgates are open! Look for more scantily clad women, and an uptick in car accidents

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