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Why chase a non-violent suspect who is the subject of a “suspicious person” call when you can just Tase him? If you don’t know that The Juice is opposed to the frequent overuse of Tasers, then you must be a new reader. (Scroll down this page, and in the “Search This Blog” box on the right side, enter “taser” or “tase”.) When used appropriately, the Taser is a good law enforcement tool. So is a gun, but that doesn’t mean you go all Wild West with it unless you have to. In yet another case of Taser overuse, check out this report out of Florida, per News-press.com:

Responding to a suspicious person call, an officer approached Martinez [who is homeless] as he was sleeping on a lawn chair by the pool around 1 p.m. at the complex at 4904 Vincennes St.

Clearly this suspicious man, who was SLEEPING on a lawn chair was a serious threat. Why wait until he runs to Tase him? Should have done it while he was sleeping. After all, he was trespassing…

While the officer was asking him questions, Martinez bolted across the pool deck.

Okay, now he’s clearly a threat to [fill in the blank]. So …

The officer deployed his Taser, hitting Martinez in the lower back.

In the process, Martinez rolled into the canal and swam across.

The officer then found Martinez hiding in an apartment rented by an acquaintance. When officers entered, Martinez escaped through the back door and was chased down by officers, who lost hold of him because he was still slippery from the swim.

Not a good day for the boys in blue, or Mr. Martinez.

Martinez was Tasered again but continued resisting and was Tasered several more times before being handcuffed.

So that’s AT LEAST four times this suspicious man was Tasered. And lest you think he did nothing, other than trespass and run:

The tenants of the apartment also told police $8 was missing from a baby collection jar. The money was found in Martinez’s pocket and returned.

Whew. Cape Coral residents can now emerge from their closets and under their beds. The streets are safe again! And what of Mr. Martinez?

He was … taken into custody and … charged with burglary, petit theft, loitering and prowling and resisting arrest without violence.

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Most things work in the movies. See, that’s because movies are not real. The Juice could be wrong (hah), but it sure sounds like these bank robbers thought they were in a movie when they pulled off (briefly, any way) a bank robbery in Houston. As reported by khou.com:

The robbers were armed with semi-automatic handguns, according to the FBI.

Marquis Garr or said he saw them run out of the bank with a bag of money.

“It was really crazy because it was my first time seeing a bank robbery,” Garr or said. “When they came out, I just seen ‘em laughing.”

Yee hah! We did it! We did it! We …

The suspects ran into a nearby neighborhood, but police spotted them a few minutes later in a Buick.

The cops tried to pull them over, but they sped off.

Cue the movie move.

Officers cornered the suspects after they drove into the Forest Park Westheimer Cemetery.

You drove into a cemetery? Brilliant!

Cemetery worker Don Phlegm heard the commotion.

“I hear a lot of police sirens coming in, and you hear boom, boom, boom,” he said.

The “boom, boom, boom” Phlegm was the sound of the suspects taking out tombstones before they bailed out of the car. At least five grave markers were damaged.

“It looks like a disaster,” Phlegm said. “Maybe 5 or 6 tombstones, they’re all cracked up and broken, and it’s gonna create a lot of work for us.”

Desecrating graves too? Not cool. Here’s the source, including some scene photos and a video news story.

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Surely this lady would not do this again, probably because she got caught. She actually went on the sidewalk in her attempt to avoid a stopped school bus! Let’s go to the videotape! (It’s an old expression, clearly.)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E6QdHpNZnbI

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One of the first things all car dealers should cover when training salesmen is … how to protect the cars they are selling. If this was covered, this newb must have skipped that day, or nodded off. Yeah, sure, hindsight is 20/20. But that doesn’t rule out foresight … As reported by wdrb.com (Louisville, Kentucky):

“He came in at approximately about 9:30 this morning,” says Perry Luttrell, G. M. Bardstown 44 Auto Mart. Luttrell says they had no idea Ronny Stutes was on the run. He says Stutes was “Very smooth…had all of his i’s dotted and t’s crossed.”

Smooth? You can judge for yourself.

On Friday, Stutes walked away from a minimum security jail in Marion County, and on Monday he was eyeing a Ford Escape. And little did his salesperson know it was going to be part of his escape.

Get it! Using an Escape to further his mistake? HIlarious. Okay, not so much.

Luttrell says, “Normally a person comes in, we make a copy of their drivers license and let them demo the car…he said he had recently got a dui and could not drive the car so he wanted my sales associate to drive for him to go show his daughter.”

Silky smooth!

The salesman drove Stutes to a nearby Walmart, and he even agreed to go inside and find his daughter. “You know her name supposedly was Tiffany. Go in ask for Tiffany and let her know that she has a surprise out here for her,” says Luttrell.

So, you leave DUI guy alone in a car, with the keys?

But police say that’s when Stutes made his move. WDRB News has obtained surveillance video of him getting behind the wheel and driving off.

Really? You need a video to tell you that? Maybe the car and Mr. Stutes not being there would tell you the same thing?

Luttrell says, “Actually when he went in and asked for tiffany and they said there’s no Tiffany that works here and at that point he realized he…so he ran back out into the Walmart parking lot and found out that she had…that he had taken the vehicle.”

No way! Wow, what an elaborate hoax that was, pulled off by a master criminal. Or not.

And there’s more, police say Stutes drove the car to Louisville where he robbed the First Capital Bank in Fern Creek. He was eventually arrested at a nearby Walmart.

You’ll find the source, including a mug shot of Mr. Stutes, here.

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Passing out in public is generally not a good thing. There are exceptions. As reported by The MetroWest Daily News (Framingham, Massachusetts):

On Friday, two women told police that they were about to go into the ATM at the Roche Bros., but [Eric Lee] Siggins was sitting on a bench outside, acting strangely. One of the women saw a handgun in the waistband of his pants and instead of using the ATM they called police, [prosecutor Maggie] Pastuszak said.

A wise decision.

When police arrived, they found Siggins sitting down with legs fully spread and his head down between his legs. He was wearing a hooded sweatshirt with a scarf covering his face, and he never responded to anything they said to them, she said.

“He refused to take his hands from the pockets,” said Pastuszak. “His hands had to be physically removed.”

As police tried to get Siggins to remove his hands, a gun fell from his pants. The weapon was a BB gun made to look like a real gun, the prosecutor said.

Doh!

In his pocket they found handcuffs, the [duct] tape, a razor-bladed knife and the string, Pastuszak said.

Hmm.

Police charged Siggins, of 145 South Main St., with attempting to commit armed robbery, resisting arrest and disorderly conduct. Pastuszak told Judge Robert Greco that she expects a carrying a dangerous weapon charge to be added.

See how lucky he was to have passed out? Think of the soup he’d be in had he gone through with it.

[The prosecutor] asked the judge to hold Siggins on $1,000 bail, but Siggins lawyer, Mark Wester, argued that no crime was committed.

Said the judge:

“I don’t see probable cause here for attempting to commit armed robbery,” said Wester. “There was no struggling. He was passed out. It may be bizarre behavior, but it doesn’t rise to the level of these charges.”

Greco ordered Siggins held on $500 bail. He is due back in court on Nov. 19 for a pretrial conference.

Here’s the source.

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It stinks when your car breaks down. It really stinks when you borrow someone else’s car, and it breaks down. It really, really stinks when you steal someone else’s car, and it breaks down, and … Per the Colorado Springs Police Department:

Shortly after completing an unrelated call for service, officers pulled up behind a stalled vehicle on Nevada Avenue, just south of Arvada Street, to provide assistance to the motorist.

Protect and serve, right? Just trying to serve …

Two occupants exited the vehicle, with the male driver running away from officers

Now, time to protect …

A suspect description and direction of travel was immediately broadcast, as well as information that a computer check of the vehicle revealed it was reported stolen. Additional officers responded to assist contain the suspect within an area of a few city blocks. A search of the area was conducted with the assistance of our K-9 Unit, which forced the suspect out of hiding. The suspect was arrested without further incident. Further investigation led to the recovery of a second stolen vehicle.

Doh!

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It’s time for the Chilean lawmakers to do some housecleaning. As reported by ilovechile.cl:

A recent study by the School of Law of the Universidad Bernardo O’Higgins (UBO), listed several situations sanctioned by the Chilean Criminal Code which may appear a bit… outdated by today’s standards.

Like what?

If you are a woman who has been widowed recently, know that if you choose to rebuild your life and get remarried before 270 days (nine months) after the death of your husband, you can face criminal charges.

Zoinks. Unlikely that one’s enforced.

If you dissatisfied with the current social, economic, or political situation in the country, any decision to “ring the bells of the people” in order to encourage your countrymen to rise against the powers that be will be punished under Article 123.  Remember that this is not just for bells only, but of any other “instrument to excite the people to revolt for that same purpose”, such as speeches or printed manifestos.

A bit chilling, that one. As for dueling …

Article 404 indicates that you must face “imprisonment in its minimum degree” if you challenge your opponent to a duel.

The same penalty will apply if your opponent, in a “fit of cowardice or wisdom”, refuses to participate and you decide to publicly chastise him for his denial.  In addition, those who choose to participate as sponsors of the duelers are also punishable.

So, unless you just say no to a duel, you’re screwed. And finally …

Article 496 of the Penal Code punishes all those who profit from making “premonitions” or interpreting dreams. Although this practice dates back many years, is still very popular.

 

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doctor%20surgeon%20bad%20.gif That’s apparently the way Dr. Henry Kinch’s mind works. Mrs. B and her husband, Mr. B, were his patients for many years. Oh, and Dr. Kinch prescribed anti-depressants to Mr. B without seeing him. I’m sure you know where this is going …

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Yes, you guessed it, Dr. Kinch (married) and Mrs. B (married 20 years, with kids) are in love and have been engaged in an affair. As reported by The Telegraph, when Mr. B confronted his wife, she said “that she was “maybe” having an affair with the doctor.” Um, it’s a “yes” or “no” question. Was Dr. Kinch any more forthcoming? Per Mr. B:

“He was very calm. He replied, basically, ‘Me and your wife love each other. We can’t help how we feel. I’m sorry but that’s how we feel and we are going to live together’.

“I then said, ‘How can you do this? You’re breaking up my family, and my children, a 20 year marriage. You are my doctor, my wife’s doctor and you will break up our marriage.’

‘Do you remember how you felt when you first met your wife and fell in love?’ I said, ‘Yes. Of course.’ He said ‘That’s what I have now. I can’t help the way I feel.’

So, we have a doctor sneaking around committing adultery, with a patient, who is also an employee, and improperly prescribing drugs to her husband [also a patient] and everything is just peachy keen. Have you no shame sir? [rhetorical question, of course]. Dr. Kinch’s dirty laundry is now being aired at a disciplinary hearing before the General Medical Counsel. Here’s hoping they are harder on him than he is on himself. To read more, click here.

Update: His punishment? A formal warning!!!! Here’s the story with the update.

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If you live in Kern County, California, the answer is … there is no limit! That’s got some folks mighty angry with Ms. Kimi Peck, who has at least 168 dogs insider her home, according to KGET News. That’s a lot of dog hair. (Can you imagine washing and brushing all of those dogs?) Why so many dogs?

Peck says the animals at her house are society’s throwaways: dogs deemed too vicious or turned over to animal shelters in the Southland over the last 15 years and facing certain euthanasia.

You can probably guess why she moved to Kern County.

“I would never have come up here if it weren’t for the laws that stated it’s ok to have as many dogs as you want as long as they are individually licensed and have rabies vaccinations,” Peck said.

In fact …

Peck says she never applied for special zoning or a permit because she was told by Animal Control that she didn’t need one.

What’s in store for Ms. Peck?

“We’re going to go to the Board at the end of February, and ask the Board of Supervisors to make a determination there is a zoning violation there and to consider imposing administrative citations against [Ms. Peck],” said County Building Inspection Division Director Charles Lackey.

Think Ms. Peck is going to pack up and look for a more receptive locale? No chance.

“What do I say to them [her complaining neighbors]? Get a life. Get a life, you poor pathetic people,” Peck said. “These are lies. And these people better be prepared for a lawsuit.”

You can read more (a fair amount) here.

Update! For some recent news on what Ms. Peck has been up to since this story was originally posted (and she’s been up to A LOT), click here.

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In the latest addition to things you can do “while intoxicated,” comes this story, as reported by The Bee News (out of Western New York):

Patrol responded to the Clarence Inn Motel for a report of 
an intoxicated male who was sitting in 
the road in a recliner. The subject and his chair were 
removed from the roadway.

Could this be the new “planking”? Nooooooo!