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This guy must have had some seriously sore feet. As reported by the South Florida Sun Sentinel:

The allure of foot relief may have been too much for a thief who held off a Wal-Mart guard with a pen knife as he fled with a stolen tube of foot cream, the Broward Sheriff’s Office said Wednesday.

The man entered the store at 10:10 a.m., grabbed a $9 tube of foot cream and hid it on his person, a sheriff’s report said.

As he left the store, a guard tried to stop him. The thief brandished a pen knife and threatened to cut the guard if he didn’t keep away.

The thief got into a powder blue, mid-1980s Chevrolet Monte Carlo with another man at the wheel and fled.

At least he got the relief he sought. (The men are still at large.) Are times really that tough, that someone has to steal a $9 item to treat a medical condition?

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Posted in: Odd Cases
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Connecticut Judge E. Curtissa Cofield said she had one beer and one mixed drink three hours before her blood alcohol level came in at .17, more than twice the legal limit. What do you think she would say if someone made the same claim in her courtroom?

As reported in The Courant, here’s how Judge Cofield was caught:

On Oct. 9 about 10:45 p.m., Cofield sideswiped a parked state police car, occupied by a trooper, with her BMW in a construction zone …

Instead of being contrite, here are a few things she had to say, as recorded by the police video:

Cofield asked [state police Sgt. Dwight] Washington: “Do you have a reading on my urine test, Negro trooper?”

She refused to sign a form and said: “I’m not signing anything, because when it comes down to the bottom line, who’s smarter, me or you? We’ll figure it out, won’t we?”

“I’m sick of being treated like a freaking Negro from the ‘hood,” she said. Asked if she had an illness and needed medication, Cofield said, “Negro-itis” and “I need to take anti-Negro, ummm …”

And this one, which was not in the video, but in the police report:

“Judge Cofield stated that she was the most intelligent person in the room and threatened our careers. … While speaking on her cellphone, Judge Cofield referred to Sgt. Washington as the ‘Head n—– in charge.'”

So what’s next for Judge Cofield, Connecticut’s first black female judge? The DUI and another charge will be dismissed if she successfully completes an alcohol education program. She’s also awaiting word from the Judicial Review Council, which held a hearing on January 26 on misconduct charges against her. Here’s the source.

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Here’s what Andrew Allen admitted stealing from a home in Blackpool, England, per the Blackpool Gazette:

“He stole a dustpan and brush, a cat basket, a trowel and lawn feeder, a basket with tools and a gardening glove.”

Street value – £51 ($75 US)! Dude, why? In a nutshell: Methadone, sleeping pills, and alcohol.

How do you think this conversation will go? “So, what are you in for?” Uh, er, um …

Posted in: Say What?
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doctor%20mask%20scary%20creepy%20strange%20weird.gif I will forever think of this case when I hear anything about the European Court of Human Rights. As reported by The Argus:

[Hypnotherapist Imad Al-Khawaja] was convicted in 2004 of indecently assaulting two women, then aged 20 and 47, while they were hypnotised.

Al-Khawaja was handed consecutive 12-month and 15-month jail sentences after the jury returned unanimous guilty verdicts.

Said the Judge:

“This was an appalling breach of trust. You abused two vulnerable woman in your charge and under your control. You have not expressed any remorse for the distress you caused.”

About that remorse …

When a disciplinary panel met in December to decide if he should be banned from medicine, Al-Khawaja sent them a letter quoting television comedian Catherine Tate: “Look at my face, am I bothered?”

Do you have a pulse? His 2 appeals within the United Kingdom were unsuccessful. But wait! What about the European Court of Human Rights? While they didn’t overturn his convictions, they awarded him 6,000 euros (about $8,000 US) plus attorney’s fees. And why would they do that?

Because he “inevitably suffered a degree of distress and anxiety as a result” of not being able to cross examine one of his accusers, whose written statement was read to the jury, but was not able to testify in person because she committed suicide before the trial! I still can’t believe any court would give this man – who inflicted so much suffering – money for his “distress and anxiety.” Here’s the source.

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Posted in: Injustice
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doctor%20bad%20operating%20suspended.gif Maybe I’ve seen too many “Nip/Tuck” commercials recently, but wouldn’t you think that the plastic surgeon who specialized in breast enhancement would be the one who left his spouse and was asking for a divorce? Such was not the case with former New Hampshire doctor James Kartell. As reported by The Eagle-Tribune:

Vajda, a North Andover resident, was dating Kartell’s estranged wife, Dr. Susan Kamm. She had moved in with Vajda and asked Kartell for a divorce.

Kartell had walked into Holy Family Hospital in Methuen on Feb. 23, 1999, with a loaded .38-caliber revolver and extra ammunition. Vajda was visiting Kamm, who was hospitalized with pneumonia.

The two men fought over who should leave, during which time Kartell shot Vajda in the stomach and then execution style in the head.

Kartell was convicted of manslaughter, and sentenced to 8 years in prison. He’s out now and …

He wants his license back! Really. He says he’s innocent, claiming he acted in self-defense. But …

… witnesses testified that the Andover doctor said, “Now, I’m going to get you” and shot Vajda close range.

Perhaps that’s why his request to get his medical license back was rejected (he’s appealing it). He’s also still fighting his criminal conviction, after recently losing his third appeal. Time to find a new job, ya think? Click here to read more.

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Okay, so it’s not like a lot of smart people ingest a pill of unknown origin from a drug dealer but… Emma Louise Fischer and Tara Jay Loane, both age 21, definitely put some distance between themselves and the rest of the ecstacy pack.

It all started when the police busted a drug dealer, and started checking the numbers on his cell phone. They put names to the numbers, and then addresses with the names. Our young ladies happened to be on the dealer’s phone. When the police went to their house, they found another cell phone. On that phone was a video of 2 girls who filmed themselves … snorting ecstacy! Brilliant! Not surprisingly, they pleaded guilty.

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A 14-year-old Canadian girl was arrested for being drunk and disorderly (she later pleaded guilty) and was placed in a cell. Maybe it’s just me, but how much of a threat can a girl that age – in a jail cell – be? As reported by canada.com:

Roberts [the family’s lawyer] said the two officers used the conductive energy device after the girl had been “sporadically peeling paint from the walls of her jail cell.” The lawsuit said she “remained motionless for nearly an hour.”

You taser a girl in a cell for peeling paint? I know, that’s the family’s lawyer talking. Well, there is a video of the whole thing, which the girls father has seen, but the police won’t release. Hmmm.

Roberts said a surveillance video taken in the jail cell that has been viewed by the girl’s father and the native band chief allegedly showed the girl scream as she was pinned down and Tasered for three seconds by the officers. He said police have refused to turn over the video to him.

I’m with the family’s lawyer on this one.

“This is not a matter of us being anti-cop because we know that most cops do a great service for us every day,” he said. “This tool is something that is to be used only in emergency situations, and now it is being used frequently. I don’t understand why they feel the need to apply an electric shock to a 14-year-old girl presenting no danger to herself or anyone.”

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A Michigander named C.J. McDonald is just dying to see his township’s meeting minutes. And he wants to see the original minutes because he doesn’t trust the ones on the web. So he filed a FOIA lawsuit, which the judge tossed because he said Augusta Township provided Mr. McDonald with “reasonable access” to the documents.

So what stinks? Per mlive.com:

Township officials cite an incident last April when McDonald smelled strongly of dead fish when he showed up for a four-hour record-reviewing appointment with Giszczak. McDonald admits to applying what he says was fish fertilizer.

Four hours! Did I mention that Mr. McDonald used to be a township trustee? Or that he has filed over 200 FOIA requests?

The four-hour stinkfest was cited in the township’s counter-suit against Mr. McDonald.

The township’s counter-suit, filed last week, seeks about $6,000 in legal fees and limits on McDonald’s future document requests.

Hmmm. Think those limits might include something on how Mr. McDonald presents himself? Click here to read more.

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Posted in: Uncool
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Sorry to disappoint a certain segment of you Juicers, but it’s nothing sexual. It’s actually criminal. As reported by The West Australian, a man broke into a butcher shop and stole a frozen chicken. He then took that chicken to a cafe, where he allegedly used it to try to smash the cafe’s window.

It probably won’t surprise you that this is how he was caught:

The alleged thief was forced to call emergency services after he was injured [a minor wrist injury] using the chook [chicken] and some rocks to try to get into the cafe …

Doh!

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Can you imagine a man’s feet smelling so bad that he got kicked out of a university? It’s true, and Teunis Tenbrook has been fighting getting the boot (sorry) FOR 10 YEARS! Exactly how a case like this can take 10 years is a mystery to me, but whatever Mr. Tenbrook did, it worked. As reported by UPI:

A judge ruled to allow Teunis Tenbrook, who was banned from attending classes at Erasmus University in Rotterdam after administrators said his foot odor was distracting to professors and students, to resume his education at the school after a 10-year lapse, The Sun reported Tuesday.

The judge said professors and students would “just have to hold their noses and bear it” if the smell of Tenbrook’s feet bothers them in the future.

The sweet smell of victory!