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lawnmower%20funny%20riding%20mower.jpg North Pole, Alaska (really) resident Wyatt Lewis got an unusual DUI. As reported by the Anchorage Daily News, here’s how fellow North Pole resident Anne Sterle described it:

“I was woken at about 1 in the morning by hearing a lawn mower outside my window,” Sterle said. “And it scared the heck out of me, because my husband was out of town.

“The first thing that went through my mind was someone was stealing our mower. And then I thought, wait a minute, we don’t have a riding mower.”

Newman! This was bad news for Mr. Lewis, as Ms. Sterle then called 911. What happened when the police arrived?

There was a chase, reaching speeds up to 5 mph.

The trooper followed Lewis for about 200 yards, according to a report in the Fairbanks Daily News-Miner. The trooper turned on his lights and siren. Lewis kept on mowing.

The trooper “was too embarrassed to call it a pursuit over the airwaves,” spokeswoman Megan Peters said.

Mr. Lewis, coming in at over twice the legal limit, was charged with driving under the influence and failing to stop at the direction of a peace officer. Here’s the source.

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Pranks are funny. But really, the only person who can prank a cop is … another cop. Tell it to these folks in Houston. As reported by khou.com …

Harris County deputies said they were initially called to a home in the 13600 block of Treebank Thursday night after reports of a domestic disturbance.

The deputies said they spoke with a couple who was in the home, resolved the situation and left.

But then, around 7 a.m. Friday, deputies received another call from the home.

When officers responded, they said they found the front door cracked open, so they went inside.

You might not want to …

… as they pushed the door open, a bucket fell on one of the deputies, and the others were splashed with liquid.

Alright, where are ya?!

The deputies called for backup, explaining that a bucket full of an unknown substance had fallen on them, and they were unsure if there were other traps in the home.

Other deputies and a bomb squad swarmed the scene. At one point, deputies drew their guns and surrounded the home. The bomb squad checked the home for other traps, but found none.

Whoa there. So what happened after all that?

In the end, though, deputies determined that the bucket was just full of water. No one was injured.

And the perps?

The occupants of the home were nowhere to be found, and no arrests were made.

Here’s the source.

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How is it possible for a 32-year-old man to get busted for underage drinking? Here’s how: Commit the crime [allegedly] when you are underage, then let a few years go by. Doh! As reported by The Hunterdon County Democrat (New Jersey):

Patrolman Tim McGuire stopped on Route 513 by the Route 78 interchange to help with a disabled vehicle Monday around 7:30 p.m.

Ummm … Thanks Officer, but I’m good?

A computer check on the license of driver Philip Rowles, of Ridley Park, Pa., turned up two arrest warrants issued by Camden City Municipal Court and Woolwich Joint Court in Gloucester County, police said. One warrant was for failing to appear on a previous traffic summons for driving without insurance, the other for possession of alcohol by a person while under the legal age.

Once again reinforcing the notion that, if you just ignore your troubles, they’ll go away! Poof! Here’s the source.

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If you’ve never been mad at your parents, then …There’s really no need to finish that sentence.

But have you ever attacked one of your parents? While the parent was driving? Who would do that? Well … per the Northwest Florida Daily News:

A 16-year-old girl was riding in the passenger seat attacking her mother while she was driving, according to a Nicevile Police report.

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To those of you who have a problem with the phenomenon of bikini-clad baristas, this post almost certainly won’t do anything to change your opinion. But if you’re a fan, you can put this arrow in your quiver. Why? Because if this “Sweet Cheeks” barista hadn’t been so concerned about her appearance, her appearance would have been drastically altered. As reported in The Highline Times (Washington) Police Blotter:

One person was slightly injured when a minivan crashed into a bikini espresso stand near S. 262nd St. and Pacific Highway. Police at the scene say that the minivan went off the highway and crashed head-on into the drive-thru window at Sweet Cheeks Espresso. The driver was slightly hurt in the crash.

According to crews at the scene, the barista who would have been standing at the window was unhurt, as she was actually touching up her make-up in another room when the minivan hit.

Here’s the source.

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(Photo courtesy of Raul Lieberwirth)

Here’s a tale of smoker who really, really wanted a cigarette. As reported in the Colorado Springs Police Blotter (April 8, 2011):

Officers were dispatched on a panicked call for help by a 24 year old resident of the Summer Grove Apartments, located near the intersection of N. Academy Boulevard and Austin Bluffs Parkway. The victim was an acquaintance of the 26 year old suspect. Santos Santier knocked on the door of our victim and requested a cigarette. Angered that he was awakened [at 1:00 a.m.] for such a trivial purpose, the resident closed the door without fulfilling his request, which now enraged Santier. Santier began kicking the entrance door, eventually gaining entry, then attacked the victim. Shortly after police arrival he was taken into custody. His actions resulted in an arrest for First Degree Burglary, a Felony. Only minor injuries were sustained by both parties.

Yikes.

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It’s strange enough that the dude stole a ferret (no offense to the ferret lovers out there), but even stranger how he got it out of the pet store. By putting it down his pants! Per The Florida Times-Union:

A Jacksonville Beach police arrest report said a 17-year-old saw a man take a ferret from the pet store, stuff it down the front of his pants and walk out of the store. The teen alerted store clerks to the theft, then followed the man to a nearby parking lot on First Avenue North.

Lifting a line from a Juice favorite, Zombieland(see below), it was time for the teen to “nut up or shut up.” And nut up he did.

The teen tried to retrieve the ferret from the shoplifter, but the man punched him and they both fell to the ground. As they tussled on the ground, the man shoved the ferret in the teen’s face and squeezed it.

The ferret, a small domesticated type of weasel, lunged at the teen and bit him, leaving two puncture holes in his ear, the arrest report says. The ferret was not injured.

Well done young man. And what happened to the thief?

… Rodney Bolton, was arrested … and charged with stealing the $129 ferret from the Pet Supermarket at 609 Beach Blvd. in Jacksonville Beach. He was also charged with battery with a “special weapon,” police said.

Too bad the “special weapon” didn’t deploy as it was being stolen from the store …

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