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It’s really not that hard to teach someone how to drive. Of course, there is the requirement that you, the teacher, be legally permitted to drive! As reported by timesonline.com (Beaver, PA):

Monaca police said [Bobbie Jo] Gacesa [age 36] was teaching a girl, whose age and identity were not released, how to drive in Gacesa’s minivan on Oct. 26, and as the girl approached Building 2 at Spring Run Apartments, her foot slipped off the brake and onto the gas pedal. The van jumped the curb and struck the building.

Police said the van damaged a metal railing, bent the door jamb at Apartment 207 and broke the building away from the foundation. No injuries were reported.

Doh! Well, even new driver’s with learner’s permits need … wait, what’s that?

Gacesa, who later admitted to police that she knew the teen did not have a valid driver’s permit or license, got behind the wheel and drove to Building 7 of the complex, where she lives. According to the police report, Gacesa made no effort to contact authorities about the accident, but a witness saw the incident and called police.

How was Ms. Gacesa caught?

Officers said they were able to follow a fresh trail of vehicle fluid right to Gacesa’s van. They said the vehicle’s engine still was warm, there was front-end damage and they could see fluids leaking.

Um. Er. Uh.

When officers checked the license plate on the minivan, they discovered it was registered to someone other than Gacesa. When they spoke with Gacesa, police said she admitted the license plate did not belong to her vehicle and that she does not have insurance.

Sorry?

Officers also discovered Gacesa’s license was expired and had been suspended as a result of a previous drunken-driving conviction. Her vehicle registration and inspection sticker also were expired, according to the police report.

Really sorry? The charges against Ms. Gacesa?

… being involved in an accident resulting in property damage, driving while under license suspension, driving without insurance, driving without registration, license plate fraud and driving without a valid inspection sticker.

Yikes!

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Regular Juice readers know that use of the bird has consequences. Here’s the latest installment of “The Bird” as reported by TCPalm.com:

St. Lucie County sheriff’s deputies went to an address in the 200 block of Camino Del Rio and spoke to the 70-year-old man. The man told deputies he was standing outside when he saw [Stephanie Maria] Mayerson [age 58] and her husband driving by. He said he “shot them the ‘middle finger,'” an affidavit states. Asked why he did so, the man said, “I do not like them for my own reasons.”

Hmm.

The man said the vehicle stopped, and Mayerson’s husband got out. The two started arguing, and the man said he called Mayerson an inappropriate name to her husband’s face.

Pretty ballsy 70-year-old. Maybe not too smart, but ballsy.

That, he said, is when Mayerson got out and punched him in the face. The man said he got knocked to the ground, scratching his wrist.

And that was the last word, at least for now.

Mayerson declined to speak with investigators.

The charges?

… felony battery on a person 65 years of age or older.

You can find the source, including a mug shot of Ms. Mayerson, here.

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Even if you are long on Apple, should this man be found guilty, in addition to being placed on the sex offender registry, you’d have to agree that he should be banned from owning Apple products – forever! (And, of course, any other device capable of recording images.) As reported by khou.com:

Isaac Gutierrez, of Houston, is charged with improper photograph/visual recording.

Of?

Investigators with the Harris County Sheriff’s Office said in an affidavit that Gutierrez allegedly placed an iPod in an air vent above a toilet stall in a women’s bathroom at the main office of an industrial manufacturing company located at the 14000 block of East Hardy, where he works.

Eeg.

Gutierrez’s co-worker said she discovered the iPod on Nov. 28 when she was the stall and saw the device in an air vent above her, the affidavit states. She retrieved the iPod and showed it to another female co-worker to see what had been recorded on the device.

The iPod had recorded the first woman in the stall and another co-worker changing from her work clothes into workout clothes, the affidavit states. They also saw that the iPod had recorded Gutierrez placing the device in the air vent.

Yes, he recorded himself committing the crime. That’s some pretty strong evidence right there.

The iPod was taken to the director of the Human Resources department, who notified police, the affidavit states. Gutierrez was released on bond Monday morning.

Here’s the source, including a mug shot.

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The Juice is not supporting burglary. But if you’re going to destroy property to steal property, shouldn’t you at least steal stuff that is worth more than the cost of the damage you did to break in? This gent abides by no such rule.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WEyIbo1iCCQ

You’ll find the source, the Jacksonville Sheriff’s Office, here.

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The Juice yearns for the good old days, when robbers and burglars used to just rob and burgle. Alas, it appears we shan’t be returning to those days. Previously, we learned about the Beanie Baby robber. Today, it’s the fish-killing robbers. Per the TribLocal:

Three goldfish were killed when a burglar poured hot sauce, mustard, ketchup and spices into a fish tank and stole a BB gun among other items from an Arlington Heights apartment, police said Wednesday.

You bastards! You killed … the goldfish! [South Park reference]

The front door of an apartment on the 2100 block of South Goebbert Road was pried open sometime between Jan. 22 and Jan. 24, and burglars made off with a Nintendo game system, CD player, 30 games, 30 DVDs, a Daisy BB gun with extra BBs, jewelry and a 50-pound fire safe containing personal papers and pictures, police said.

Here’s the source.

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So this bus driver broke up a fight between two students on her bus. No need to thank her, just doing her job … Wait, you fired her? For dropping a few f-bombs in the process of breaking up the fight? Not cool at all. As reported by The Toronto Sun:

The union representing a Halifax bus driver who was sacked for swearing at teenagers who were fighting on the school bus has filed a grievance to get her job back.

Heather Vidito’s F-word-filled rant was captured in a video that was posted to YouTube last week. In the clip, which has since been removed [damn it!], two students can be seen fighting at the back of a school bus while other students egg them on.

Seems like a strong showing of authority is in order, right?

Vidito approaches and yells: “Get the f[uck] up now.” The woman continues to swear at the students, saying they “shouldn’t be being f[uck]ing stupid.” [expletives reinserted]

Stock Transportation fired her, saying she violated the company’s policies.

You bastards!

The Nova Scotia Government Employees’ Union, however, thinks the sacking is too harsh. It is negotiating with Stock and has filed an official grievance with the company to fight for her job.

The move comes after thousands of Nova Scotians joined a Facebook group calling for Vidito to be reinstated. Folks are also raising money for the out-of-work driver to pay her bills.

Crap. Now The Juice is going to have to go on Facebook to show his support…

One Facebook supporter wrote: “She diffused the situation by giving back as good as she got. I respect her for having the balls to stand up to those boys in the only way that got their attention.”

Another wrote: “Give Heather her job back! She was trying to do her job when the students rudely interrupted her.”

The students — one of whom attends junior high, the other high school — have been disciplined by their respective schools.

You’ll find the source here.

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It seems that this young lady is a little too attached to her phone. As reported by TCPalm.com:

While cleaning the house the mother found [18-year-old] Jennifer Natale’s cellphone. The mother said she took the phone because the teen was not being truthful about where she received the phone, the report states.

That’s when Natale grabbed a large kitchen knife and came toward her mother.

“I’m done with this,(sic) today is the last day I am going to take this. I’m gonna kill you (expletive),” Natale is quoted as saying in the report.

Wo.

During a tussle over the knife, Natale bit her mother on the back. Natale left when her mother called 911, the report states. Deputies arrested the teen when she returned home for her clothes.

Yikes!

Deputies Monday charged [her] with felony aggravated battery domestic and misdemeanor battery.

Natale was being held at the Martin County Jail without bail on Tuesday.

Here’s the source, with a mug shot.

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For the last time (unlikely), people, they’re called “bottle rockets,” not “sky rockets.” Anyway, as reported by The Hamilton Spectator (Ontario):

Police say a man entered the Galleria hallway at the Fallsview Casino Resort in Niagara Falls and ignited an incendiary sky rocket firecracker, shooting it down a hallway where it struck a casino patron. The patron did not require medical attention.

Brilliant!

Charged with assault with a weapon and mischief is Stanley King, 29, of Burlington.

Here’s the source.

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You make a mistake. You own up, suffer the consequences, and move on. Or, like this doc, you don’t own up, but you don’t fight it, and you suffer very few consequences. As reported by The Middletown Press (Middletown, Connecticut), from a decision by the Medical Examining Board:

Fined Brian M. Connolly, an anesthesiologist, $5,000 for performing a nerve block on the right leg of a patient who was having knee replacement on the left leg at New Milford Hospital in July 2011. Connolly, who works for New Milford Anesthesia Associates P.C., didn’t admit guilt, but agreed not to contest the charges and to pay the fine. This will be reported to the NPDB.

Seriously? You don’t make the guy admit guilt? Like it would be hard to prove? And $5,000? The Juice does not approve. Here’s the source.