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Simmer down there fellas. Or put some gloves on and hit a punching bag. But don’t do this! As reported by Per The Hamilton Spectator [Ontario]:

According to police, a man was driving his car on Mud St. W Friday when the passenger in a truck driving by in the next lane threw something out the window, striking his car.

He honked, but the truck did not stop. When the two vehicles pulled up to a red light, the truck passenger got out and waved a knife at the man in the car.

He drove away, but the truck followed. At the next red light, the truck passenger got out and threw a brick at the car windshield. Hamilton Police responded and with help from witnesses, arrested a man at his home.

Kyle David Lee, 24, of Stoney Creek is charged with assault with a weapon, uttering threats to cause bodily harm, mischief under $5,000 and two counts of failing to comply with probation.

Something, then a knife, then a brick? Whoa there fellas. You’ll find the source here.

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Hey, the guy is an entrepreneur. You’re going to bust him for renting houses? Well, yes. As reported by cleveland.com:

Danny Heaggans [age 33] illegally gained access to at least four vacant, abandoned or foreclosed homes [on Bedford, Ohio] and installed locks to make it look like he had legitimate access, police said.

Heaggans made repairs and showed the properties to people looking to rent a house, according to police.

Investigators found that Heaggans presented lease agreements to the prospective renters and collected security deposits and one month’s rent.

Police think Heaggans is connected to several more housing scams in Cuyahoga County.

Interesting, but totally uncool. Here’s the source, including a mug shot.

 

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Most things work in the movies. See, that’s because movies are not real. The Juice could be wrong (hah), but it sure sounds like these bank robbers thought they were in a movie when they pulled off (briefly, any way) a bank robbery in Houston. As reported by khou.com:

The robbers were armed with semi-automatic handguns, according to the FBI.

Marquis Garr or said he saw them run out of the bank with a bag of money.

“It was really crazy because it was my first time seeing a bank robbery,” Garr or said. “When they came out, I just seen ‘em laughing.”

Yee hah! We did it! We did it! We …

The suspects ran into a nearby neighborhood, but police spotted them a few minutes later in a Buick.

The cops tried to pull them over, but they sped off.

Cue the movie move.

Officers cornered the suspects after they drove into the Forest Park Westheimer Cemetery.

You drove into a cemetery? Brilliant!

Cemetery worker Don Phlegm heard the commotion.

“I hear a lot of police sirens coming in, and you hear boom, boom, boom,” he said.

The “boom, boom, boom” Phlegm was the sound of the suspects taking out tombstones before they bailed out of the car. At least five grave markers were damaged.

“It looks like a disaster,” Phlegm said. “Maybe 5 or 6 tombstones, they’re all cracked up and broken, and it’s gonna create a lot of work for us.”

Desecrating graves too? Not cool. Here’s the source, including some scene photos and a video news story.

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This woman took advantage of the country’s appropriate high-alert status (not the media-stoked fear of an outbreak here) in a really, really stupid way.  As reported by 610wtvn.com:

There is no word on possible charges involving a Columbus woman who admitted faking Ebola-like symptoms in order to get an ambulance to her South Champion Ave. home sooner.

The woman, who hasn’t been identified, initially told a 911 dispatcher that she had traveled to west Africa.

Medics donned hazmat suits and responded to the woman’s home, then took her to OSU’s Wexner Medical Center to be checked out.  There, the woman reportedly admitted she made the story up.

Here’s hoping she gets charged. And here’s the source.

 

 

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Most people appreciate just being told the truth. Police officers are no exception. So enough with the excuses already! But if you want to read some whoppers, check this out, as reported by The Cambridge News:

Cambridgeshire police have released the raft of bizarre excuses told to officers who have stopped motorists.

Here we go …

Drivers stopped for speeding and breaking other road rules have blamed messy children, pregnant dogs, the “wrong” speed limit and trying to catch a ferry by doing 150mph.

One young driver who was stopped by police was not wearing a seatbelt as the “colour did not match clothes he was wearing”.

And a motorcyclist speeding stated: “I did not know laws of physics” as in windy conditions it was safer for him to go quicker.

Other recent excuses include the “chap” stopped for speeding at 37mph in a 30mph zone near Cambridge who said it was “slow enough for his village”.

And one mother was stopped for speeding and gave the excuse: “I was concentrating on my children not spilling their food in the car.”

Driver Kevin Millard, of Berwick-upon-Tweed, was caught near Histon after travelling at 150mph while four young children were in the car without seatbelts and only heavy traffic on the A14 slowed him to 90mph. His excuse to officers on September 14 was that he was trying to get to Dover in time to board the last ferry to Germany after missing a vessel in Hull. He was jailed for 20 weeks at Peterborough Crown Court on Tuesday, June 17.

Sgt Mark Rabel, based at Histon police station, said: “I had an excuse when I asked a motorist I stopped for speeding that it was an emergency. Apparently he had to get home with haste as his dog was giving birth to puppies. I kid you not. A ticket was issued.”

[Not a good day for this family ] … “the husband and wife team [were] stopped separately for speeding within 20 minutes of each other” in a village near Cambridge.

You’ll find the source here.

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Someone hits your car on purpose. Of course, you get all the pertinent information. If you’re this guy, that would not be the license plate, type of car, etc. Per sfgate.com:

A woman intentionally rammed her car into a man’s car while arguing over a parking spot in the Haight, but the victim was so focused on her low-cut dress that all he could describe to officers afterward were her breasts, San Francisco police said Thursday.

The woman drove away after hitting the man’s car at Haight and Cole streets at 5 p.m. Tuesday, said Park Station Officer Al Wu. The man couldn’t tell officers what kind of car it was, let alone supply a license-plate number, but he “was able to give a detailed description of the suspect’s cleavage,” police said.

No one has been arrested.

And nobody every will be. Here’s the source.

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At least according to Merriam-Webster, a “fetish” is defined as “an object of irrational reverence or obsessive devotion,” or “an object or bodily part whose real or fantasied presence is psychologically necessary for sexual gratification and that is an object of fixation to the extent that it may interfere with complete sexual expression.” Given this man’s behavior, think he has a toe fetish? Per The China Daily:

A woman in Dalian, Liaoning province, was attacked by a man who wanted to bite her toes.

The woman said the man, who looked about 25 years old and was well dressed, chased her as she was climbing the stairs of a residential building.

To the woman’s surprise, when the man caught her, he took off her right shoe and bit two of her toes. He fled after the woman kept hitting him with a plastic bottle.

Yikes. So many strange people in this world. Why toes? Sure, The Juice could google it, but he’ll leave that to you.

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We’ve all had bad roommate experiences. It’s unlikely any of you did anything similar to what this gent did. As reported by rentonreport.com:

A 28-year-old Renton man was arrested early Sept. 30 after he thrust a samurai sword through his bedroom door his roommate was standing behind.

Say what?

The two were arguing when the suspect went into his bedroom. The suspect punched a hole in the door and then thrust the sword out the door, stopping about five inches from the victim’s pelvic area.

The victim jumped back and wasn’t stabbed. “That could have killed me,” he told the roommate.

The suspect was still in his bedroom when officers arrived. He surrendered. He refused treatment for superficial cuts to his hand and arm.

He was booked into the King County Jail for second-degree domestic assault for intentionally forcing the sword through the door in an attempt to stab the victim.

Whew. Five inches! Might want to live on your own for a while.

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Does it matter that the conduct did not involve a case? You (and the Pennsylvania Judicial Conduct Board) can make that call. As reported by The Philadelphia Inquirer (at Philly.com):

The Inquirer has reported that [Pennsylvania Supreme Court Justice Seamus] McCaffery, using a private e-mail account, sent at least 10 messages containing sexually explicit content in 2008 and 2009 to an agent in the Attorney General’s Office. The agent then forwarded the material to dozens of others in the Attorney General’s Office, according to copies of the e-mails.

You can read a lot more here.

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Sure, it’s illegal. But can it possibly be that this is a judicious use of police manpower? Unlikely. As reported by The Morning Call (Lehigh Valley, PA):

A detective from the Monroe County district attorney’s office made arrangements to meet Brian K. Ryder Friday after reading his ad on Craigslist from a male seeking a female to “smoke with.” The ad read, “Any females into 420? It’s nice out. Let’s go smoke. Email if interested.”

Investigators made arrangements to meet Ryder at the Stroud Mall on Route 611, but Detective Joseph Coddington pulled him over in his pickup truck prior to arriving at the mall. Ryder was charged with possession with intent to delivery marijuana, possession of a small amount of marijuana and possession of drug paraphernalia. He also was cited for having an expired inspection on his truck.

Yes, that’s him. [The photo is from the Monroe County District Attorney's office.] Dude looks like he’s thinking “Really? You did all that for this?” Here’s the source.

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