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crime
A Mississippi state legislator wasted little time in between talking about the crime problem in Jackson to becoming part of it. As reported by wapt.com:

Hours after state Sen. John Horhn hosted a meeting addressing crime problems in Jackson, he was arrested on a DUI charge, police confirmed.

Horhn had called a meeting at the State Capitol earlier in the evening and heard from Jackson residents about crime.

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Let’s just say this lady does not take criticism well, especially when she’s behind the wheel. What did she do when her husband took exception to her driving? As reported by The Argus Leader (South Dakota):

A Sioux Falls woman tried to run down her husband with a Chrysler New Yorker Thursday night for questioning her driving skills, police say.

Shazam! You might be wondering about the logistics of running someone down for “backseat” driving. The Juice will explain.

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i dare you
What, you think just because it’s Niceville that they won’t call the cops? As reported by the Northwest Florida Daily News:

Niceville Police officers were summoned to Tisa’s Lounge on John Sims Parkway, where an employee said he’d told a 25-year-old Ohio man to leave several times. The man refused and was still in the lounge when officers arrived.

They told him to leave but the man refused, saying “I wouldn’t have to leave in Ohio.” Officers pointed out Florida law differs from Ohio law, but he still refused to leave, saying, “I don’t believe you.”

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car key
Please, please, please just tell The Juice you did not fall for the oldest trick in the book – the “key swap.” Okay, so The Juice had never heard of the “key swap” either. As reported by tcpalm.com:

It sounds like a Hollywood heist. Thieves stole a $55,000 vehicle from the Arrigo Dodge dealership Wednesday afternoon without breaking a sweat or a window.

Maybe Hollywood, Florida, but pretty smooth nonetheless.

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doughnuts donuts
You will not believe the lengths this gent went to just to get a discount on some donuts, not that asking them for free would have changed the story very much. As reported by www.mysuncoast.com:

Deputies say 48-year-old Charles “Chuck” Barry went to the drive-thru of a Trinity Dunkin’ Donuts last week, and after identifying himself as law enforcement, asked for a discount on his order of donuts.

Why certainly officer! No?

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twins
Coming forward as a witness is your civic responsibility, even when it’s dangerous. That said, the concept of “honor among thieves” is altogether different. Tell that to this gent, who committed a slew of crimes with his twin brother. As reported by wmbfnews.com (Charleston, South Carolina):

Federal prosecutors say a 30-year-old man was convicted of 39 armed robberies after his twin brother testified against him in court.

Wo. That is a boatload of armed robberies.

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Hawaiian mom Ijeva Matavele had not been pleased when her 14-year-old daughter failed 2 classes. The girl agreed to get tutoring, and things … did not improve. As reported in the Honolulu Advertiser:

The daughter… skipped tutoring classes and hung out with friends. On the day her report card was due, the daughter — even though she was reminded by the mother to bring it home — said she forgot it at school, but eventually disclosed her grades included four C’s, one D and one incomplete.

When the mother demanded to know why the grades hadn’t improved, the daughter refused to answer. The mother then grabbed a plastic backpack containing a school folder and jacket and hit the daughter on the left arm as the girl tried to block the blow.

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Beginning at the beginning – it’s a hunk of metal, plastic and glass.It can be replaced. A brain splattered all over the pavement can’t. From The Orlando Sentinel:

Val Jacques was playing chess at a Christian community center on Central Boulevard in Orlando on Friday afternoon, police say, when he saw a man climb into his sport utility vehicle. He’d left the keys in the ignition.

Jacques tried to open the door to the Mazda SUV, but the man locked it. Police say Jacques climbed on the roof, and the thief hit the gas.

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Nobody likes waiting in the ER. But few people, if any, have reacted as this woman did. And it didn’t stop there. As reported by The Cleveland Plain Dealer at cleveland.com

Prosecutors said in April that [37-year-old Teri] Garko sought emergency medical treatment at the hospital and became angry at being kept waiting. She attacked the technician who was assigned to check her vital signs.

That will certainly get you attention. Not help, but attention.

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Do you think you would wake up while someone was setting your pants on fire? This gent didn’t. As reported by nj.com:

A 47-year-old Trenton man suffered burns to his leg when his pants were set on fire last night after he fell asleep on the front porch of his home, police said.

The man awoke around 9 p.m. on the 1200 block of East State Street to find his pant leg on fire, police said.

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