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fight
Now this is one dad you would think would espouse the idea of letting a kid fight his own battles.  If he does subscribe to that, he’s flexible, based on how his kid is doing! As reported by wkmb (Orlando, Florida):

New video released shows a father encouraging his son to fight another teen, then joining in on the fight when his son starts to lose, police said.

The video was obtained by Satellite Beach police after it was shot by teens who witnessed the Nov. 22 fight of SR-A1A.

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please be quiet
“Um, excuse me. Could you please keep it down?” Fuhgeddaboutit. Ain’t nobody quieting this lady down. As reported by The Star-Ledger at nj.com:

A 47-year-old Hackettstown woman went on a rampage and was arrested when police arrived at her house to check into a noise complaint last week, authorities said.

Gail Tortorella was drunk when police showed up to her home on Ashley Avenue at about 6:45 p.m. Thursday, Hackettstown police said in a release. Instead of calming down, police said she became belligerent.

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attorney lawyer
Unless there is something the reporter is holding back (or didn’t bother to find out), this lawyer did one helluva job for his client. What did he do? Read this, as reported by www.reviewonline (East Liverpool, Ohio):

Jason Cope, 38, Silliman Street, pleaded guilty to OVI second offense, attempting to use deception to obtain dangerous drugs and falsification. Additionally he stipulated to a probation violation charge.

Do you know how much jail time he got for these four offenses? Zippy. Squadoosh. Nada. He had already been …

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Hey, younger drivers are going to make mistakes, especially after they’ve had something to drink. Here’s the latest installment of “Yikes” as reported by The Hamilton Spectator (Ontario):

A Burlington teen faces careless driving charges after crashing into a home. Halton police say ‘miraculously’ no one was injured when the 19-year-old left the roadway at 10 p.m. Wednesday night.

You’ve got to see the pictures. (Click here.)

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For real. Apparently it wasn’t the first time Michael Rainey’s cat mistook neighbor Joseph Loflin’s yard for a litter box. As reported by Click2Houston.com:

“‘Your cat has been back there defecating in my back yard,'” [former police officer] Loflin said he told his neighbor. “I used the slang word, the four-letter word to describe what the cat was doing.”

The “slang word?”

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no littering sign don't litter litterbug bug
Have you EVER heard of anyone getting a ticket for littering? They should, but it just never seems to happen, much to The Juice’s chagrin.  Well, a litterbug in New York got busted, sort of. As reported by brooklynpaper.com:

The litterbug told police that he tossed some trash in the parking lot of a fast-food chain between Kingsland and Morgan avenues at 12:50 pm. A moment later, two men came up to him and showed him shields.

Officer, arrest that man! He just admitted to littering! No?

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first class seat

If you have ever been lucky enough to fly first class, maybe you’ll have some understanding of what this man did… As reported by The Highline Times (Washington State):

A man sits in King County jail after he allegedly bolted through a security checkpoint at Sea-Tac Airport and onto an empty plane. The suspect did not have a plane ticket when he ran through the TSA passenger screening area. The man reportedly made it to Gate D10 and is accused of going through emergency exit doors and onto an airport ramp. He then climbed the stairs to the jetway, broke safety glass on a security door, made it on to an empty American Airlines plane and belted himself in a first class seat. Officers entered the plane and were able to take the suspect into custody after a short struggle. The man, in his late 20ʼs, was likely under the influence of drugs. A judge set bail at $100,000.

First, what the hell kind of security is that? A guy who is completely wasted makes it through the TSA screening, gets all the way to Gate D10 (you know that’s not close), and then makes it onto a plane? And $100,000 bail seems a little excessive. He hardly sounds like a flight risk (get it?).

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FRG3plate
It’s not too hard to figure out who the owner of this vehicle roots for. It’s a little harder to figure out why someone who came across this plate decided to take it to another level. As reported in The Washington Post:

The above license plate was tweeted to Dan yesterday by an eagle-eyed reader who took exception to its meaning. While there are many possible explanations for what the “F” stands for, the Cowboys sticker on the car indicates that the real answer is one I can’t write here.

The person who tweeted the photo also copied the Virginia Department of Motor Vehicles’ Twitter feed. The DMV is on top of its social media, and has vowed to look into it.

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female police officer
And this thief thought she had the perfect hiding place. Well, as it turned out, not so much. As reported by wdrb.com (Louisville, Kentucky)

Demonica Allen was arrested after police say she stole money while working at a stand during a University of Louisville game.

Police uncovered $166 from Allen after she was arrested.

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dui check point checkpoint dwi

If you’ve had a few, and you’re approaching a DUI check point, what would you do? The Juice can say with at least 99% certainty that you would not do what this man did. As reported by BeeNews.com (Western New York):

A vehicle entered a road check being conducted by the Buffalo Strike Force Detail on Lisbon Street. A Trooper observed that the operator was drinking a beer and that the vehicle had bald tires. The operator failed field sobriety tests and was placed under arrest for Driving While Intoxicated.

The dude was drinking a beer at a DUI check point! Shocking that he failed the field sobriety test …