The Juice really, really dislikes liars. Everyone screws up. When you do, just own up to it, and accept the consequences. A drunk-driving English lawyer took a different approach. As reported by The Independent:
Francis Bridgeman, 43, attempted to create an elaborate web of lies to cover up the drink-driving offence … Bridgeman’s Land Rover Sport was found locked and in a ditch in Shovers Green, Ticehurst, East Sussex, at about 1am on April 7, 2010, having crashed into a telegraph pole, police said.
Officers traced the Land Rover to Bridgeman’s home in Wards Lane, Wadhurst, but the lawyer claimed armed men had kidnapped him in the car park of Wadhurst railway station, before driving him off at knifepoint with a bag over his head in another vehicle and then dumping him in Cousley Wood
And, as an officer of the court, you’re sticking with that? Really?
Sussex Police said a breath test carried out at his home proved he was just over the drink-drive limit and he was arrested on suspicion of drink-driving.
Barely over! So he can’t even claim that he came up with such a lame story because he was shitfaced!
Police launched a kidnap investigation but Bridgeman’s recollection of events could not be substantiated, police said.
And physical evidence?
Bridgeman’s DNA was found on the Land Rover’s airbag, showing that he must have been driving the car when it crashed, Sussex Police added.
Curse you, DNA!
He was charged with perverting the course of justice, drink-driving, driving without due care and attention and failing to report a road accident.
After a 5-day trial, guess how long it took for the jury to find him guilty? 45 minutes! So what was the sentence?
Judge Guy Anthony banned Bridgeman from driving for 18 months and ordered that he pay £4,200 costs.
Additionally, Bridgeman was sentenced to 12 months in jail.
Quoting a line from Sir Walter Scott’s poem Marmion, [the Judge] said: “Oh, What a tangled web we weave, When first we practise to deceive.”
He added: “You wasted valuable police time and public expense in order to escape a drink-driving offence when you should have had the courage and decency to plead guilty from the outset. To pervert the course of justice is a serious offence and warrants a custodial sentence.”
Hear, hear, your Honor. Hear, hear. You’ll find the source here.