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snake snakes

Please, tell The Juice that this Connecticut legislator did not just push the button to talk and say that. Alas, he did. As reported by the The New London Day:

State Rep. Ernest Hewett, D-New London, was removed from his post as deputy speaker this week after making an inappropriate remark to a teenager testifying during a committee hearing.

Go on.

During a Feb. 20 Appropriations Committee hearing, a female 17-year-old ambassador for the Connecticut Science Center asked the committee to continue funding the center’s ambassador program.

During her speech, she said the program helped her overcome her shyness and get over her fear of snakes.

“I am usually a very shy person, and now I am more outgoing,” she told the committee. “I was able to teach those children about certain things like snakes that we have and the turtles that we have. … I want to do something toward that, working with children when I get older.”

Near the end of her speech, committee co-chairman state Rep. Toni Walker, D-New Haven, smiled at the girl and made a comment about how the teen was no longer shy.

All this talk about snakes, you can probably see where this is going.

Hewett, 56, recalled Thursday that he then pushed his microphone button to talk and said, “If you are shy, then I have a live snake under this desk.”

Wildly inappropriate does not begin to do justice to this colossally idiotic, insensitive remark.

According to an audiotape of the hearing, Hewett said: “If you’re bashful I got a snake sitting under my desk here.”

“What I meant to say was, if you are shy then I have an acre of land in the Everglades,” he said Thursday.

Did the spin work? Nope.

A spokesman for the Democratic caucus, Gabe Rosenberg, said that in reaction to the comment, Hewett has been stripped of his deputy speaker title. He will lose $6,446 from his salary, which means he will make the base legislative salary of $28,000, according to a legislative document.

And because of the incident, legislators who have not been through a sexual harassment training recently will have to take a refresher course, Rosenberg said. Freshman and sophomore legislators recently underwent training, he said.

You can read more (a fair amount) here.

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So back in 1996, this couple in Arkansas set up a Trust. The beneficiaries were his 3 kids and her 3 nieces. Simple enough. Well, after Robert died, guess what Robena did? Kids? What kids? She amended the trust to exclude her deceased husband’s 3 kids, effectively disinheriting them. Surely they did not intend for something like this to be done when they set this thing up … or did they? Here’s the operative provision of the Trust document:

14. REVOCABILITY: The Donors, Robert F. Blann and Robena P. Blann, may, by signed instruments delivered to the Trustee during the Donors’ life: . . . (3) change the beneficiaries, their respective shares and the plan of distribution. . . .

It seems pretty clear to The Juice, as it did to the kids too, who went to court to have this amendment tossed. So what did the court say?

The judge said the language was ambiguous [wrong!] but ended up tossing the amendment on the grounds that, when they set the Trust up, Robert and Robena intended for changes in beneficiaries to be made by both parties.

Of course that’s what they intended! That’s what it says! “Donors’ life” means BOTH of them. So when the nieces appealed (like you didn’t see that coming), what do you think the Arkansas Court of Appeals said? Not surprisingly, they agreed with The Juice completely, finding that the Trust is not ambiguous at all, and telling the nieces to pound sand. Too bad they’ll still share in the Trust proceeds, albeit in smaller shares.

You can read the full opinion (Hartsfield, et al. v. Blann, et al.) here.

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Working on your knife-throwing in a public area is not a good idea under normal circumstances.  How about under these circumstances, as reported by kval.com (Eugene, Oregon):

Police responded to the commercial district near NW 9th Street and NW Spruce Avenue around 5:30 p.m. Sunday to a report of a man throwing a knife at trees [near a credit union drive-through].

The officer contacted [Drew William] Phillips, [23] who told police he was practicing his knife-throwing skills with a 3.5-inch fixed blade knife.

Phillips had 7 warrants out for his arrest. He was arrested and booked into jail.

Perhaps keeping a low profile would have been wiser? You’ll find the source, including mug shots, here.

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Warning: Do not read this right before, or after, eating, because it’s really, really gross. Okay, here it goes, per The Standard, “China’s Business Newspaper”

A domestic helper has appeared in court accused of trying to injure her employer by mixing her menstrual blood in a pot of vegetables she was cooking.

You were warned …

In some Southeast Asian cultures menstrual blood is thought to have special magical powers.

Prosecutor Vincent Lee gave a statement to the court in which the Indonesian maid admitted under caution to mixing the blood with the vegetables in the belief that it would make her employer, surnamed Mok, “more amicable and less picky.”

Perhaps this is TMI, but here it is:

Mok [the employer] peered through the kitchen door and saw the helper acting suspiciously. She entered the kitchen and found the accused throwing something into the trash bin.

When Mok checked, she allegedly found blood clot-like substances mixed with the vegetables and water in the cooking pan.

She later discovered a used sanitary napkin in the bin and called the police.

The Juice won’t be eating for a few days. And just in case your appetite is not totally gone, The Standard also reports that:

Last year, a court in Saudi Arabia sentenced two Asian domestic helpers to four months in prison and 250 lashes each for contaminating the tea of their employer with urine and menstrual blood.

And …

In December 2007, another Indonesian domestic helper in Hong Kong added urine to the drinking water of her employer and his family.

She believed it would make the family treat her better. It was discovered after the family noticed a difference in the taste of the water. The maid was jailed for three months on a charge of “administering poison or other destructive or noxious things with intent to injure.”

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safe combination dial

If one person can’t carry the safe, nobody would say you made a poor choice in going with that one.  Still, The Juice is quite confident these folks will be going with a much bigger safe this time. As reported by nj.com:

Bridgewater police are investigating the burglary of an Ardmaer Drive home that occurred on July 12.

And as you know, it wasn’t just any old burglary.

According to Bridgewater Police Lt. Timothy Hoey, burglars stole cash, jewelry and a “significantly sized” safe with “substantial weight.” Hoey said the safe was so large that one person alone could not have removed it. Hoey said he could not confirm what was in the safe or the value of the items that were taken.

It would really be a hoot if, after hauling the safe and whatever the perps have to go through to open it, there wasn’t jack inside. Here’s the source.

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sweet and sour sauce

Even if you like sweet and sour sauce, ain’t no way you like it as much as this Washington State man. As reported by The Highline Times:

A man entered a fast food restaurant at the 14800 block of 4th Ave. S.W. asking for some condiments. The clerk told him no. That angered him so he pulled out a knife and demanded they hand over some sweet and sour sauce. There were no reported injuries and it was unclear if they had the suspect in custody.

Clearly a head-scratcher.

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police lights

What lengths would you go to in order to avoid a speeding ticket? Ladies, would you fire up the waterworks? Gents, would you throw yourself on the mercy of the officer? You won’t believe what this guy did. As reported by WFTV.com:

A man is accused of calling 911 to say that a murder was about to take place, but West Melbourne authorities said the caller was just trying to get out of a traffic stop.

Yes, you read that correctly.

Police said that Julius Lupowitz called 911 to report a murder in hopes that the officer who stopped him would respond to the priority call on Wingate Boulevard rather than write him a citation.

Lupowitz is heard in the call saying there was a man with a gun and that someone was going to get shot and then the call is disconnected.

“I see there’s a murder that’s going to happen, I swear, on Wingate, on Wingate. No, Wingate and Wickham. No, on Wingate and Hollywood, Wingate and Hollywood,” the man said in the call to 911. “I swear there’s going to be a murder any second. I swear there’s a man with a gun.  Please, I just called, it’s Wingate and Hollywood.”

The 911 operator received a second call from the same man, telling the same story. As the operator probed the caller for more information, he again disconnected the line.

But this lead-footed criminal genius was no match for the 911 dispatcher.

A quick-thinking Brevard County Sheriff’s Office dispatcher did a search for prior incidents associated with the telephone number the 911 calls came from to find the phone belonged to Lupowitz. West Melbourne Police Officer Ted Salem was on the traffic stop when the 911 calls were received.

As he attempted to quickly end the stop to respond to the priority call, he overheard the dispatcher relay over the air that Lupowitz was the telephone owner.

“When she broadcast that information, our officer was standing at the door of Mr. Lupowitz’ vehicle and realized it was the same person making the 911 calls,” said Richard Cordeau, with the West Melbourne Police Department.


Police said Lupowitz would have only received a $209 speeding fine, but now, he faces a third-degree felony charge for misuse of the 911 system and he still received the citation. Police said that charge could land him in jail for up to five years if convicted.

Lupowitz was arrested later at his home without incident, police said.

“This incident needlessly tied up a critical component of public safety. The 911 system is intended for people who truly need help. In addition, these false calls created an unnecessary delay in our officers’ ability to respond to true emergencies,” said Lt. Cordeau of the West Melbourne Police Department.

He was turned over to the Brevard County Sheriff’s Office and given a $2,000 bail amount.

You’ll find the source, and a mug shot, if you click here.

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Door are similar in that they all lead somewhere. On a plane, though, where they lead is kind of important – the bathroom, or, as reported at theindependent.ie …

Tomasz Mucha (26) had never been on a plane before and drank vodka and beer to steady his nerves before attempting to open the back door of the Ryanair aircraft.

Yeah, unless you’re on the ground, that door is not your average door. But fortunately …

Dublin District Court heard he did not manage to get the door open due to the air pressure.

Whew. Still, the Judge must have thrown the book at this gent.

Judge James Faughnan fined him €200 after the accused said he realised how serious the situation could have been.

And that was after “Mucha … pleaded guilty to being intoxicated on an aircraft and using threatening, abusive or insulting behaviour.” Had that happened in the United States, do you think the guy would have been hit with only a 200 euro fine ($270 US)?  You’ll find the source, and more, by clicking here.


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There are bad apples in every profession. Yes, there are even bad park rangers, but probably very few that are this bad. In fact, I’ll bet this guy isn’t even a park ranger! Per The San Francisco Chronicle:

Marin County authorities are warning hikers to beware of a man claiming to be a park ranger who in the past month has kicked dogs, taken photos of women with a cell phone and given out false information about dog rules.

The man twice misrepresented himself as a ranger for the Marin County Open Space District, according to county officials. Both incidents happened on a fire road in the Blithedale Summit Open Space Preserve between Mill Valley and Corte Madera.

The man – described as white, “very fit” and in his 40s – identified himself as “Dave Stevenson” from “the department,” but he is not employed by the district, officials said. He is between 5-foot-10 and 6 feet tall, has short salt-and-pepper hair and in both incidents was wearing black and silver biking clothing. He had a black mountain bike with him in both incidents.

Marin Open Space rangers always wear uniforms.

And they never kick dogs! Click here for the source.

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asleep sleeping

This guy could not have made it any easier for the police to bust him for driving while intoxicated. As reported by  The Hunterdon County Democrat (New Jersey):

The incident happened on Friday, July 18, just before midnight on Route 31 north near Echo Lane. Patrolman John Tiger saw a 2013 Ford Mustang stopped on the northbound shoulder with its hazard lights activated. Upon approaching the car, Tiger saw Rafael Genao, 35, of Washington sleeping in the driver’s seat while the engine was running, police said.

Genao’s right hand was on the gear shifter, the car was in neutral, and the emergency brake was on. When the officer woke Genao, Genao de-activated the emergency brake and the car rolled backward, hitting Tiger’s patrol vehicle, police said. After several attempts, Tiger was able to get Genao to park his vehicle, turn it off and hand over the keys, police said.

Um. Er. Uh. Well … sorry? Fuhgeddaboutit.

Tiger detected the odor of an alcoholic beverage on Genao’s breath, determined that he was intoxicated and arrested him. At headquarters, Genao refused to provide samples of his breath for chemical testing to determine the content of alcohol in his blood, police said.

So …

Tiger charged him with driving while intoxicated, refusal to submit to a breath test and careless driving. His vehicle was towed from the scene and he was released to the custody of a responsible adult.

You’ll find the source here.