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If more people were as suspicious as this “good samaritan,” The Juice would move to an island. Hell, he might just do it any way. As reported by khou.com:

A loving husband triggered a massive police presence on Tuesday at a Cricket Store in southeast Houston

Police received a call that someone in the store was being held against their will.

What did the man do to warrant all this?

Actually, the store manager was hugging her husband goodbye.

A passerby saw the embrace and thought she was being held hostage.

Next time, do us all a favor, and keep it to yourself!

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What exactly is HRUI? You have to ask? It’s horseback riding under the influence. The Juice has blogged daily for 7 years, and he hasn’t come across a similar case. Driving a motorized barstool under the influence? Yup. Driving riding mowers under the influence? Many times. Anyway, as reported by 9news.com (Denver, Colorado):

Patrick Schumacher is facing charges of riding a horse while under the influence of alcohol after witnesses saw the rider and horse occasional wandering into traffic on Broadway near the school Monday afternoon [in Boulder].

Officers observed that Schumacher was slumped to his right side as he crossed streets and forced pedestrians off the sidewalk. Police pulled the horse over, and Schumacher was arrested on suspicion of riding under the influence after he was given a sobriety test.

How do you pull a horse over? But wait, it gets a little stranger still.

Police say Schumacher had a small dog in his backpack and beer in one of his saddlebags. The horse and the dog have been impounded.

 Schumacher is also facing a misdemeanor animal cruelty charge as well as prohibited use of weapons and a reckless endangerment charge.

Wow. Lots of charges. In case you’re wondering where he was going with his dog and his beer …

Schumacher told officers that he was traveling from Larkspur to Bryce, Utah (a 600-mile journey by car) on his horse in an effort to attend his brother’s wedding.

Schumacher said he previously lost his driver’s license, so he decided to ride his horse to Utah.

Brilliant! You’ll find the source here.

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This thing could have gone south many times … but it didn’t.  As reported by The International News:

The robber entered the bank and went up to the teller’s window but could not load his gun. He next tried to break the window with the gun but failed again.

The robber then climbed up on the counter and managed to drag the window down. He then proceeded to steal whatever money he could find.

The CCTV video showed the robber almost exiting the bank but then remembering that he had left his gun behind on the counter. The criminal also had difficulty fleeing when he could not start his motorcycle.

Despite all these errors, authorities were unable to stop the robbery from taking place.

The Juice is confident that, given how smoothly the robbery went down, the gent will be caught!  Here’s the source.

 

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Since the dawn of the school lunch, their have been bullies around to steal lunch money. But this is not your typical lunch money shakedown, and not just because it also involves stealing lunches. No, this case is unusual because of who did the stealing. nbcphildelphia.com reports that …

A New Jersey school bus aide was arrested after she allegedly stole bagged lunches and money from dozens of preschool students.

Now that is pretty damn low.

Rosa Rios, 33, of Millville, New Jersey, was arrested Friday and charged with robbery and theft. Rios worked as a bus aide for the Sheppard Bus Service.

A Millville Police Officer said she was looking over surveillance footage from a school bus in the company back on Feb. 4 while investigating whether money was stolen from the bus driver. She then spotted Rios on camera going through the students’ backpacks, police said. In all, Rios stole lunch money and bagged lunches from 29 kids between the ages of three and five, according to investigators.

Police said the thefts took place between the beginning of January and the beginning of February.

So a bunch of kids went hungry for over a month? No wonder they set bail relatively high.

Rios is currently being held in Cumberland County Jail in lieu of $50,000 bail. Police also said she no longer works at Sheppard Bus Service and the company is working with them to obtain more surveillance footage.

Click here to see the source, which includes a short video news story.

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If you had to guess the state, you would have guessed “Florida.” You would have been right. As reported by The Miami Herald:

Miami-Dade County Judge Jacqueline Schwartz broke judicial conduct rules when she told the owner of a Coconut Grove convenience store last year to “Go f— yourself” in a dispute over a political campaign sign, the Florida Judicial Qualifications Commission has found.

The punishment? A public reprimand, and she has to write a letter of apology to the convenience store owner. You can read A LOT MORE, and see a photo of the judge, here.

 

 

 

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There is something to be said for keeping your composure. There’s also something to be said for getting as far away from the scene of the crime you just committed as fast as you can.  Per NJ Advance Media for NJ.com:

Michael J. Cassano, 38, of Oakland Gardens, N.Y., allegedly robbed Hudson City Savings Bank on Essex Street just before 3 p.m. He placed a BB gun on the counter, and the teller gave him $4,000 in cash, Lodi police Detective Capt. Donald Scorzetti said in an e-mail.

Woo-hoo! Quick, scram! Or at least don’t linger. Or …

He ran off, but didn’t go far, Scorzetti said. He went into a Dunkin’ Donuts at 370 Essex Street (about a fifth of a mile away, according to Google Maps) to get a cup of coffee, Scorzetti said.

Cassano then asked a man in the parking lot for a cigarette. As he walked back to his car, two Maywood police officers stopped him, Scorzetti said. Cassano allegedly had both the cash and the BB gun in his possession.

He has been charged with first-degree robbery and two other weapons offenses. Bail has not yet been set, and Scorzetti said federal charges are also pending against Cassano.

You’ll find the source, including the mug shot, here.   (This post is brought to you by your friendly neighborhood personal injury lawyer, the neighborhood being Washington, DC, Maryland, and Virginia.)

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Surely there have been plenty of bank robberies that have benefited from the help of an insider.  But have you ever heard of a bank robbery where all of the participants were insiders? Well, you have now. As reported by emirates247.com:

Staff at a branch of Afghanistan’s central bank in southern Kandahar province may have got away with as much as 81 million Afghanis ($1.4 million) when they robbed their own bank and ran, an official said on Saturday.

That is a truckload of Afghanis!

The Kandahar raid is believed to have been carried out by a senior official at the bank, an employee of nine years, with the help of his son and brother-in-law who were also on staff, according to Azimi.

Think they’ll be apprehended?

The robbery at the branch in Spin Boldak near the border with Pakistan was discovered on Thursday and investigators believed the group has escaped to Pakistan.

Fuhgeddaboutit. Here’s the source.

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The “selfie” craze was crazy even pre-Weiner.  This young man took it to another level. As seen and written on khou.com (yes, there’s a video):

Officers pulled over 17-year-old Kenneth Davis around 4 a.m. Monday in a truck, police said, was stolen.

Okay, he’s in some trouble.

After Davis gave officers permission to look at his phone, they discovered several pictures and a video of Davis driving around in another pick-up truck they recognized as stolen.

In the video, Davis appears to be lip syncing to a rap song while it plays in the radio.

“It’s a sign of the times,” said Sgt. John Krueger of the La Porte Police Department. “That’s just a reflection of the younger criminal at this time—they feel comfortable bragging with their friends.”

Police say Davis also admitted to breaking into another vehicle parked off the 8700 block of Collingdale. The teen managed to open the lock but since the vehicle had a club on the steering wheel, he was unable to drive off.

Davis has been charged with two counts of unauthorized use of a motor vehicle and one count of burglary. Police say the pictures on his phone might implicate him in even more crimes.

Now he’s in a lot of trouble. Here’s the source, including the selfie video.

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The Juice should have a separate flavor (check out the “flavors” [categories] on the right-hand side of Legal Juice) for posts like this: “What were you thinking?”  As reported by The Baxter Bulletin (Mountain Home, Arkansas)

Bull Shoals police officer David Chatman gave Stephen Lewis [age 47] a simple choice on Friday afternoon: take down a sign Lewis was putting up in Bull Shoals or receive a citation. (Lewis is the owner of Lewis Sign & Neon in Mountain Home.)

You should know that Mr. Lewis was driving a 30-foot-long, 12-foot-high bucket truck!

The incident started when Chatman informed Lewis that the sign he was erecting in Bull Shoals did not have a permit. Because sign owners didn’t have the proper documentation, Chatman told Lewis that the sign had to come down or he would receive a ticket.

Chatman described Lewis as uncooperative, saying he would not produce his driver’s license and would not get out of the truck when Chatman asked him to do so. Lewis eventually did get out of the truck and give his license to the police officer.

“I went and sat in my patrol car to write the citation out,” Chatman said. “At that time, I observed Mr. Lewis get into his truck, put it in drive and take off.”

Now that is a man with a plan.

Chatman informed his dispatcher that he was in pursuit of the large white truck heading east on Arkansas Highway 178. The pursuit was slow, never getting above 45 mph, according to authorities. Officers from Flippin, the Arkansas State Police and the Baxter County Sheriff’s Office headed out to various points in hopes of laying down spike strips.

45 mph? Shoot, even on his beater commuting bicycle, The Juice can almost hit that. Ok, maybe 30, going down a steep hill.

The pursuit ended at the intersection of AR Highway 178 and AR Highway 5 North when officers boxed Lewis in, forcing him to pull over.

Lewis was arrested by Bull Shoals police and taken to the Marion County jail, charged with fleeing and obstructing government operations, plus two additional misdemeanor offenses. He was released Friday night on $855 bond.

Think he’ll get the “proper documentation” next time? Here’s the source, including a photo of the getaway vehicle.

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When making a decision, one component is often something like this: “What is the worst thing that will happen to me if I do this?” This gent certainly did not make that calculation before he made this recent decision, as reported by North Country Now (Potsdam, New York):

Potsdam police report that at 2:08 a.m. Thursday, an officer saw [MD] walking on Main Street with an open container of an alcoholic beverage.

Hey, not so fast with the jumping to conclusions. Okay, so it was probably the right conclusion, but still …

“Patrol made contact with [MD] who refused to obey the officer’s orders which was to stop walking away from the officer. [MD] was then escorted to the ground by patrol and was placed into custody. [MD] was transported to the Potsdam Police Department where he was processed and released on appearance tickets for the listed charges,” then department’s blotter report said.

Doh! Should’ve just taken the open container citation! That could have been the worst thing that happened to him. But it was not to be.

[MD], 28, of Potsdam, [was] charged with resisting arrest after allegedly refusing an officer’s order to stop walking away with a presumed open container of alcohol.

Oh, so now it’s “presumed” to be alcohol? Here’s the story.