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dog nose sniffing

It is abundantly clear that you just don’t mess with Malone. That dog can flat-out smell, as a gent with a full cavity discovered. As reported by kvia.com (El Paso, Texas):

The seizure was made at approximately 1:30 p.m. Monday at the Paso Del Norte pedestrian crossing. A 35-year-old U.S. citizen from El Paso entered the port from Mexico and was selected for a secondary exam by CBP officers. CBP drug sniffing dog “Malone” alerted to the man. During the course of an interview with CBP officers the subject admitted that he had heroin concealed within his body. The subject removed a single oval shaped pellet from an internal cavity. The contents of the 136 gram bundle tested positive for heroin.

CBP officers took custody of the subject and turned him over to U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement HSI special agents for arrest. Federal prosecution was accepted and HSI agents booked the subject, Paulo Alfredo Macias, into the El Paso County Jail where he is currently being detained without bond.

“From an internal cavity …”? Why not just say it was in his anal cavity, or his anus, or his butt? Is there any other plausible “internal cavity” other than the one he used? You’ll find the source here.

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flash

(No, not the kind of flash in the picture above.) Assuming everything this woman says is true, you just have to scratch your head. As reported by www.timesonline (Beaver, Pennsylvania):

The owner of a Moon Township landscaping business has been charged with exposing himself to a female passenger in his car. Moon police have charged 72-year-old Armando Zucchero of 233 Ewings Mill Road, owner of Zucchero Landscaping, by mail with indecent exposure.

So what happened?

The woman said she was walking home to Ridgewood Drive from the Giant Eagle on University Boulevard when Zucchero pulled over near the Sunoco station and offered her a ride. Thinking he was a neighbor of hers, the woman got into the vehicle, police said.

However, even after she realized Zucchero was not the neighbor, the woman was not suspicious because he knew her name and names of her neighbors, she told police. The woman told Zucchero he could drop her off in front of the old Texaco station at University and Moon-Clinton Road, but Zucchero offered to drive her closer to home to Foxwood Road, according to the police report.

A little strange, right?

Zucchero kept driving past Foxwood, however, and as they passed the Appian Way Lounge, she told police, Zucchero exposed himself. She said he then drove all the way to the Dependable Drive-In before turning around and driving back to the Appian Way Lounge, where Zucchero offered to buy her a drink and she accepted, the report said.

Very creepy, and WTF is up with accepting the drink?

Inside the bar, the woman said Zucchero gave her his business card and asked her if she had any friends before offering her $20 and pointing toward his crotch, which she took to mean he wanted sex, the report said.

Even more creepy. So she took off or asked for help, right? Nope.

The woman then said she had to leave and Zucchero again offered a ride, which she accepted.

Oh no you did not just take that ride!

Once in the vehicle, though, the woman said Zucchero again exposed himself, and she jumped out of the moving vehicle and traveled different paths and trails home so he could not follow her, the report said.

So after all that, you decide it’s time to get away while in a moving car? Wow. So how did they identify the suspect?

When giving her description to police, the woman said she believed the man who had exposed himself was her elementary school bus driver sometime around 1986 to 1991 who knew her name even though she had never given it to him.

Based on the business card and description, police on Wednesday contacted Zucchero, who denied knowing the woman, offering her money for sex or ever being a bus driver.

Truly a strange case. It’ll be interesting to see how it plays out. You’ll find the source here.

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2p two 2 pence coin coins

Actually, madam, your money isn’t good anywhere in the United Kingdom. As a personal injury lawyer, but for his alter ego, this is not something The Juice would normally come across. No doubt Ms. Louise Munro would not have come across a law like the Coinage Act of 1971 either, had she not tried to pay for her gas with, well, coins! As reported by The Liverpool Echo:

Staff at the BP garage in Queens Drive, West Derby, told 24-year-old Louise Munro that they could not accept the 1p and 2p pieces she offered after her bank card failed because of a system failure.

Say what?

Ms Munro, from Roby, who went home to raid her piggy bank for the loose change to settle her debt, was even told by police over the phone that the garage was correct in refusing the payment after a row broke out.

According to the Royal Mint, 1p and 2p coins are legal only if something is bought for just 20p or less.

Under the little-known Coinage Act 1971 it is illegal to use 21 or more 1p pieces in a single transaction.

A truly brilliant customer relations move by the gas station…

Ms Munro, who denied she was being vindictive by handing over coppers, said: “I admit it’s annoying to have to count pennies but that’s all I had and I’m not the kind of person to leave a debt hanging. I wanted to settle it as soon as I could.

“As far as I was concerned it is legal tender – it has the Queen’s head on it and why would they produce them unless they could be used?”

Seems reasonable. After all, it’s only £30, and it’s not like it’s a daily occurrence.

The dispute happened on Sunday afternoon after Ms Munro’s RBS debit card was rejected because of the bank’s system troubles.

And it was brought about through no fault of Ms. Munro!

… she returned three hours later with two money bags filled with carefully counted-out coppers.

But after the garage searched the internet to see if they could accept the change they stumbled across a newspaper article from earlier this year telling of an accountant who was sued for trying to pay an £800 bill in coppers. There they learned of the Coinage Act 1971.

A phone call to the police also confirmed that Ms Munro’s payment contravened the Coinage Act.

[Garage worker Mugeen] Mohammed said the petrol station has not cashed the loose change and wants Ms Munro to return with an alternative form of payment.

Really? People are probably just lining up to buy gas at such a customer-friendly station.

Merseyside Police confirmed they were contacted over the dispute but said it was a “civil matter”.

Whew. No jail time. You’ll find the source here.

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license plate plates

Yeah, yeah. Someone has to review vanity plate applications in every state. Of course, what is approved and what isn’t never seems to make a whole lot of sense. If you want to see A TON of plates requested in Florida and whether they were accepted or rejected, click here. Here’s a sampling, as reported by WTSP.com:

While G8TR H8R, G8TR H8R2, G8R H8, G8RS SUK, and G8R PIMP were all rejected, G8TR HTR was approved in 2007.

While OLD FART was rejected, HORNMAN was approved.

While GUN PLAY was rejected, GUN SAFE was approved.

While BIG TURD was rejected, BG JONSN was approved.

Unfortunately for Rays fans, neither SOX-H8TR nor YKS SUK was approved.

So how are these momentous decisions made?

“(We review) things that would be generally objectionable,” said Department of Highway Safety & Motor Vehicle (DHSMV) spokesperson Leslie Palmer. “Things dealing with race (and) things…of a blatant sexual nature.”

Before a license plate is rejected, the majority of a special DHSMV committee must indicate it could be offensive to a large group of people. Then, one of the agency heads still must uphold the committee’s findings.

Here’s the source.

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hundred dollar bill

If a store won’t take your fake hundred … just go to the next one, and the next one … As reported by Lancasteronline.com:

Toni Lyn Miller, 32, of Sinking Springs, passed a fake $100 bill at one outlet store and tried in vain to pass a similar bill at four other outlet stores, East Lampeter Township police Lt. Robin Weaver said.

Shouldn’t have gotten greedy.

In each incident, the she selected an inexpensive item to receive a large balance of change in return.

Yeah, that’s not suspicious at all. And who would have thought that maybe one of the merchants who rejected the hundred would call the police? Um, lots of people?

Police charged Miller with five counts of felony forgery, four counts of misdemeanor criminal attempt at theft by deception and one misdemeanor count of theft by deception.

She was arraigned on the charges and committed to Lancaster County Prison.

Here’s the source, including a mug shot.

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angry anger

Here’s the question The Juice has for the perp: WTF?  As reported by The Herald (Rock Hill, South Carolina):

[According to Rock Hill police], a 44-year-old man texted [Julie] Baker [31] to break up with her this weekend. She then went to his room at Piedmont Medical Center and began fighting the man’s ex-wife.

Say what? First of all, breaking up with someone via text? Say it to her face. And speaking of faces …

Baker left before police arrived, but an officer noticed a cut and swelling above the ex-wife’s eye.

Yeah, that makes sense. Take it out on his ex-wife.

Warrants were issued and Baker was arrested Tuesday.

Click here for the source, which includes Ms. Baker’s mug shot.

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sleep sleeping in bed

Falling asleep on the job is never a good thing.  But if this is your “job”, you are really in the soup. As reported by The Herald-Tribune:

A man burglarizing a Nokomis home passed out on the bed beside a bag of stolen jewelry and didn’t notice deputies taking his picture, according to the Sarasota County Sheriff’s Office.

According to the Sheriff’s Office Facebook page, a cleaning lady discovered Dion Davis, 29, inside her client’s home in the 500 block of Albee Road on Monday, sleeping on a bed with a bag full of stolen jewelry. Deputies arrived and photographed Davis, who did not notice.

At least he has one thing going for him – he’s a sound sleeper.

Davis, of Nokomis, was arrested, charged with burglary and booked into jail on $10,000 bail.

You’ll find the source, and the photo of the sleeping Davis, here.

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OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

Motorized grocery carts are very useful for certain folks while doing their shopping. But outside of a grocery store, what would anyone use it for? The police may have asked Mr. Wedding that question, among many others. Per wdrb.com (Louisville, Kentucky):

According to an arrest report, an officer saw 19-year-old Anthony S. Wedding driving the [motorized] grocery cart on the sidewalk near the corner of New Cut Rd. and 3rd St. Rd., just before 3 a.m. Wednesday.

Police say the officer stopped Wedding to talk to him, and Wedding allegedly told the officer that the nearby Kroger said he could drive the motorized cart home.

“Sure, Mr. Wedding, take the cart for as long as you need it. Oh, and the groceries are free today. So take them too.”

The officer contacted representatives of Kroger, who denied giving Wedding permission to take the cart and accused him of stealing it, according to the arrest report.

Why, you might wonder, did Mr. Wedding do it?

Wedding allegedly smelled strongly of alcohol, had bloodshot eyes and slow speech. Police say he admitted to drinking half a pint of alcohol earlier in the day.

Big shocker there. What were the charges?

Wedding was charged with theft by unlawful taking, alcohol intoxication in a public place and giving an officer a false name or address, according to the arrest report.

Dude is damn lucky he didn’t get a drunk driving charge too. Seriously. Regular Juice readers know this has happened when drunk folks have “driven” similar vehicles. Here’s the source, including Mr. Wedding’s mug shot.

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scales of justice out of balance

For this judge, the job is apparently not all about banging away on a gavel and doling out some justice. Although she has only been charged, it’s not looking good. As reported by lancasteronline.com:

A Lancaster city district judge has been removed from the bench after she was charged Monday with a dozen criminal offenses.

The charges relate to District Judge Kelly S. Ballentine dismissing three of her own parking tickets last year and in 2010, according to a police affidavit.

After a lengthy investigation, the state Attorney General filed 12 charges, including nine felonies, regarding Ballentine’s conduct while on the bench.

She’s charged with tampering with public records (six counts), restricted activities due to a conflict of interest (three counts), and obstruction of the administration of law (three counts).

As of Monday, Ballentine will no longer hear cases or serve as district judge.

“At this time, I have issued an order that she be placed on indefinite administrative leave until all criminal charges are resolved,” said Lancaster County President Judge Joseph Madenspacher, who has authority over the county magistrates.

If you’re wondering how the Judge will get by, here’s how.

Ballentine will receive pay during that time, [Judge] Madenspacher said. “I have no power to suspend her.”

Here’s the skinny:

According to records, Ballentine dismissed three of her own tickets for parking illegally in front of her house.

Ballentine, 43, dismissed a no-parking ticket and an expired registration ticket in December 2010 and a no-parking ticket in January 2011, the affidavit shows.

As The Juice said, it’s not looking good. Here’s the source. And here’s a follow up to this story.

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Walmart sign

Why do so many weird things happen in or around Walmart? Probably because they’ve taken over, and people spend so much time there. Any way, this gent won’t be welcomed in Walmart, or anywhere else, for a spell. As reported by The Herald-Tribune:

A North Port retiree was jailed Wednesday after he masturbated near a woman outside of a North Port Walmart, the city’s police reported.

Ew.

It was at about 12:50 p.m. when officers responded to a call from the 45-year-old female shopper. She said Raymond Douglas Hunt, 62, had followed her throughout the store, waited for her as she checked out and followed her to her car.

As the woman placed her groceries inside her car, Hunt stood nearby with his hands in his pants, staring at her. She told officer she believed Hunt was masturbating.

Seriously, ever heard of computer porn? Magazines? Leave the poor woman alone.

Hunt drove off before police arrived, but was found a short while later and confessed to the crimes alleged against him, police said. He was charged with simple stalking and lewd and lascivious exhibition by an adult.

He is being held in Sarasota County Jail, without bond for the stalking charge.

Here’s the source, including a mug shot.