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handcuffed handcuffs

Hey, even The Juice fought a traffic ticket (and won, um, thanks to Officer No-Show). In all seriousness, The Juice had a valid legal defense. And perhaps this guy did too. But if you were dealing drugs, would you show up in court to fight a traffic charge? As reported by phillyburbs.com.

An arrest warrant had been issued Monday for Corey McCloud, 36, of Gentle Road, for allegedly selling to a confidential informant .29 grams of suspected cocaine Jan. 29 in Bristol Township.

He apparently didn’t know that, and was arrested when he appeared at a Bensalem district court for a hearing on a charge of driving while his license was suspended or revoked, Bristol Township Lt. Terry Hughes said.

Doh!

The drug charges stem from drug deals in the 7100 block of Bristol Pike in January and February, according to police. In addition to allegedly selling cocaine in January, McCloud sold a confidential informant crack cocaine on three other occasions on Feb. 5, 12 and 22, according to a probable cause affidavit.

He was arrested and arraigned before Bristol Township District Judge Robert Wagner Jr. on four counts of manufacture, delivery or possession with intent to manufacture or deliver. He was sent to Bucks County prison in lieu of 10 percent of $20,000 bail in each of the drug cases.

Here’s the source, including a mug shot.

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lawnmower lawn mower

If you have issues with your neighbor, take them up with your neighbor (and do it in a civilized way!)  Leave the lawn guy alone! Unfortunately it did not go down that way, as reported at mysuncoast.com (WWSB):

According to the Charlotte County Sheriff’s Office, deputies met with the victim, the owner of a lawn service business, at a residence in the 6400 block of Thorman Road around 4 p.m. Wednesday.

The victim told deputies he was hired to mow the lawn at the residence and was in the process of doing so, when 71-year-old Patrick Botelho approached him.

Yes, Mr. Botelho has anger issues, hates his neighbor, or both.

The victim said that Botelho asked him why he wasn’t trimming the weeds from the flower beds. The man said he was not hired to do so, that the home owners had contracted with him to only trim the lawn. Botelho told the victim that the weeds were getting into his lawn and told the victim he had better trim the flower beds.

Or else what? Well …

When the victim declined, Botelho allegedly tried to pull the victim off the mower and grabbed him around the neck, choking him so that he was gasping for breath. Another worker who was nearby trimming around the house saw what was happening and ran toward the two. At that point, Botelho released the victim and went back to his own house

Botelho was arrested and transported to the Charlotte County Jail. He was being held on a $2,500 bond.

Not cool. You’ll find the story, and a mug shot, by clicking here.

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question mark

The cops have you red-handed, with the evidence right there in front of you. So what do you do? Here’s an option you might not have considered. As reported by the Hunterdon County Democrat (New Jersey):

On Thursday, June 1, at about 1:55 a.m., Patrolman Joseph SanGiovanni saw a 2012 Nissan Maxima driven by LaQuan Mayes, 38, of Newark, allegedly fail to stop at a red light on Route 22.

Upon stopping the car, Patrolman SanGiovanni smelled raw marijuana inside the vehicle and saw a dime bag of marijuana in plain view inside of the cup-holder in the center console, police said. When the patrolman requested that Mayes hand over the bag, Mayes picked it up and ate it.

Gulp. “Bag? What bag?”

A consensual search of Mayes’ car did not turn up any additional contraband.

Free to go? Not exactly.

Mayes was charged with possession of less than 50 grams of marijuana, obstruction of justice, failure to make lawful disposition of a controlled dangerous substance, driving while in possession of a CDS and failure to observe a traffic signal. He was released on his own recognizance.

What? You released him? And the evidence? Here’s the source.

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bite

While you were trying to shoplift, the loss prevention officer was just doing his job, which sometimes, well, really bites. As reported by The New Hampshire Union Leader:

A city woman is facing a felony charge because she bit a loss prevention officer at Macy’s who caught her shoplifting items worth $800, police said.

Ouch!

Crystal Frechette, 34, of 28 Railroad Square, was arrested Tuesday afternoon and charged with robbery, a Class B felony.

That’s right – a felony.

Had she not allegedly bitten the Macy’s employee, the charge would have been a misdemeanor.

And if you’re wondering what the difference in potential sentences is …

A Class B felony is punishable by up to seven years in prison, while a misdemeanor carries a maximum 12-month jail sentence, both exclusive of fines.

Yikes. You’ll find the source, with a mug shot, here.

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python

You wouldn’t be surprised to hear that the victim of a crime assisted in the apprehension of the perp, would you? But what if the victim was … a reptile? As reported by 7online.com (WABC):

The incident happened around 7 p.m. Monday on Jericho Turnpike in New Hyde Park.

The driver, identified as 22-year-old Sarah Espinosa, of Albany, apparently lost control of her Toyota Prius, crossed the median, struck a Nissan Maxima and careened into the fire station.

So what did the “victim” have to do with the crash?

… according to police, was that a stolen snake in her car had wrapped itself around her neck.

Yikes!

The vehicle plowed through the main door, striking two fire trucks inside.

Fire personnel who were present at the time of the accident rendered aid to the victim, at which time they discovered a small ball python snake wrapped around her neck.

They removed the snake and secured it at the scene.

Officers responded and determined Espinosa had stolen the snake from a nearby PETCO just prior to the accident.

Oh there’s more.

During the investigation, Espinosa was found to be in possession of marijuana.

She was treated and released from a local hospital, and no other injuries were reported. The snake was returned to the store.

Espinosa is charged with reckless endangerment, petit larceny, reckless driving, driving while intoxicated and unlawful possession of marijuana.

You’ll find the source, including a video, here.

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volume

Ah roommates. If you’ve ever had a roommate, and you say you’ve never had an argument, you’re lying. Still, a knife? As reported in The Brooklyn Paper:

The victim told police that he knocked on his roommate’s door at their apartment between Norman and Nassau avenues at 12:30 am and asked him to lower the volume of his tunes.

Seems like a reasonable request.

The two then started to fight …

Uh oh.

… at which point the housemate grabbed a kitchen knife and stabbed the victim in hand, and then punched him in the head and face, cops said. The victim suffered a deep cut on his hand and bleeding and swelling to his face and was taken to Woodhull Hospital.

It wasn’t enough to stab him?

Police say that when they arrived at the house, they found the knife in the kitchen sink.

Hey, at least he’s not a slob too. The charge: assault. “Wanted: Quiet, considerate, non-knife-wielding roommate.”

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nails manicure

Girls wanted to get their manicure on. Totally fine. Not paying for it, and worse? (you’ll have to read below) – totally uncool. As reported by The Orlando Sentinel

Ty Nguyen called police around 2:45 p.m. Thursday after the three teens ran from MD Nails on Claracona Ocoee Road after having their nails done. The girls arrived at the nail salon and asked to have sets of acrylic nails applied, Nguyen told the Orlando Sentinel.

When the $60 manicures were finished, the teens — a 15-year-old and two 17-year-olds who the Sentinel is not naming because they are minors — refused to pay, according to police.

Not cool, but check this out:

Nguyen said he chased after the teens and that’s when the 15-year-old girl pulled out a pink Taser and shocked him.

Since they weren’t named, you’ve probably figured out that these little ladies got busted. How?

Nguyen, who photographed the teens as they ran and even as one pulled out the Taser, jumped in his car, followed them to a nearby apartment complex and called 911 to report the attack and the $180 theft.

A property manager at the Waterstone Apartments, in the 5200 block of Long Road, was shown a picture of the three girls and immediately recognized them. Officers were shown the apartment where at least one teen lived.

You do NOT mess with Mr. Nguyen!

As officers approached the unit they hear what sounded like “several juveniles yelling,” reports show. But when officers knocked on the door and announced their presence, the noise stopped.

The teens refused to open the door for at least 20 minutes when an adult resident arrived at the home with a key. Officers found the three teen suspects and several other juveniles inside the apartment, reports show.

Think they came clean?

The 15-year-old told officers she “did not pay for her manicure because someone else was supposed to pay,” and shouted, “I didn’t tase anyone!” reports show.

Officers arrested the trio and charged them with aggravated battery with a weapon, resisting a merchant and petty theft. They were booked into the Juvenile Assessment Center and the Taser was confiscated.

You had the Taser! Aaargh. Here’s the source.

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eye

Olay hires Twiggy (age 60) to promote a product (the Definity eye illuminator) that supposedly makes your eyes look younger. Said the ad, next to a photo of Twiggy …

Olay is my secret to brighter-looking eyes.

There’s just one small problem – the photo was airbrushed! I kid you not. And it was for this reason, as reported by The Guardian, that the ad …

… has been banned by the advertising watchdog, after more than 700 complaints gathered for a campaign against airbrushing in ads by the Liberal Democrat MP Jo Swinson.

In its ruling, the ASA said that it considered that the post-production retouching of the original ad, specifically in the eye area, could give consumers a “misleading impression of the effect the product could achieve”.

A combination of the retouching and the language of the ad was likely to mislead consumers, it ruled.

What was Procter & Gamble’s (they own Olay) defense?

P&G said that there would “always be differences between uncomplimentary paparazzi shots and professional beauty photographs”.

Really? Just fess up. You perpetrated a fraud (albeit not earth-shattering). You got caught. You’re sorry. And it won’t happen again. But Nooooooooooooo! (channeling John Belushi from SNL) …

P&G added that it was “routine practice to use post-production techniques to correct for lighting and other minor photographic deficiencies before publishing the final shots as part of an advertising campaign”.

That’s your defense? That this shit happens all the time? Nevertheless …

The company said that there had been some “minor retouching” around Twiggy’s eyes, which was inconsistent with its own policies; this had already prompted it to withdraw the original ad and replace with one in which there was no post-production work around the eyes.

Here’s the source, with a picture of the ad.

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car

Have you ever heard of a charge for DWM? It stands for Driving While … This is some seriously aberrant behavior, and incredibly dangerous. Check out this story from WJHL in Kingsport, TN:

Three women testified against former Mount Carmel Vice-Mayor William Blakely, graphically recounting times he exposed himself while driving. News Channel 11 had the only reporter in court for Thursday’s preliminary hearing in Kingsport.

“I was scared that I was gonna wreck, he was gonna cause me to wreck,” witness Deborah Sturgill said.

“It seems that every victim would tell the same story. But I knew all the victims did not know each other,” Kingsport Police Detective Terry Christian said.

Yikes.

Personal accounts in Thursday’s testimonies started the same – Blakely allegedly waving to get the drivers’ attention, then escalating to honking and partially crossing over into the drivers lane.

Certainly a little scary.

“Waving, grabbed his shirt, kind of pulled it up,” witness Deanna Dykes said.

Now it’s getting creepy too.

“After the waving, it turned into a lot of beeping, him grabbing his chest area, and asking me going ‘please, please’ (clasping hands together) with his hands, may I… show me yours,” witness Kelly Street said.

Creepier.

Each witness testified they were fearful Blakely’s driving would cause an accident. “He was taking his hand, wetting his mouth, and masturbating,” Sturgill said. “At over 90 miles per hour, he had his penis out [the window]… he was masturbating

Well, there’s the “M” part of “DWM.” So after all of those incidents, how did he get caught?

… and that’s when it got really, really bad. I wouldn’t look over any more, and I wrote his tag number down on my hand, which I believe he noticed, and he exited very quickly,” Street said.

Bam!

Detective Terry Christian says it’s Street’s writing down of the license tag number that served as a catalyst for William Blakely’s charges.

“It went on for so long an nobody’s addressed it,” Christian said, referring to the dozens of phone calls the department has received over the course of three or four years – she said, related to Blakely’s behavior. Ages of the alleged victims range from 16-65. Christian says Thursday marked a turning point, when three women, out of what’s said to be many more – conquering fear and embarrassment.

Nice job, ladies. Dude was an accident waiting to happen. You can read more here.

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snake snakes

Please, tell The Juice that this Connecticut legislator did not just push the button to talk and say that. Alas, he did. As reported by the The New London Day:

State Rep. Ernest Hewett, D-New London, was removed from his post as deputy speaker this week after making an inappropriate remark to a teenager testifying during a committee hearing.

Go on.

During a Feb. 20 Appropriations Committee hearing, a female 17-year-old ambassador for the Connecticut Science Center asked the committee to continue funding the center’s ambassador program.

During her speech, she said the program helped her overcome her shyness and get over her fear of snakes.

“I am usually a very shy person, and now I am more outgoing,” she told the committee. “I was able to teach those children about certain things like snakes that we have and the turtles that we have. … I want to do something toward that, working with children when I get older.”

Near the end of her speech, committee co-chairman state Rep. Toni Walker, D-New Haven, smiled at the girl and made a comment about how the teen was no longer shy.

All this talk about snakes, you can probably see where this is going.

Hewett, 56, recalled Thursday that he then pushed his microphone button to talk and said, “If you are shy, then I have a live snake under this desk.”

Wildly inappropriate does not begin to do justice to this colossally idiotic, insensitive remark.

According to an audiotape of the hearing, Hewett said: “If you’re bashful I got a snake sitting under my desk here.”

“What I meant to say was, if you are shy then I have an acre of land in the Everglades,” he said Thursday.

Did the spin work? Nope.

A spokesman for the Democratic caucus, Gabe Rosenberg, said that in reaction to the comment, Hewett has been stripped of his deputy speaker title. He will lose $6,446 from his salary, which means he will make the base legislative salary of $28,000, according to a legislative document.

And because of the incident, legislators who have not been through a sexual harassment training recently will have to take a refresher course, Rosenberg said. Freshman and sophomore legislators recently underwent training, he said.

You can read more (a fair amount) here.

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