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Okay so it is vandalism, but it barely register’s on the Vandalometer.  How was he caught? The way many “criminals” are caught, of course – by following the trail of penises! As reported by TheLocal.dk:

A 31-year old man from Aalborg was convicted for a fairly bizarre act of vandalism on Tuesday.

On a visit to the local IKEA in Aalborg, the man had taken one of the store’s wooden pencils and proceeded to casually stroll through the warehouse drawing small penises on the walls and pieces of furniture on display.

“He drew up to 30 penises on walls and shelves around the warehouse,” Rikke Poulsen from the North Jutland police told Berlingske News Bureau.

IKEA staff eventually caught up with the vandal who had left a trail of crudely drawn genitalia in his wake and reported him to the police.

Once caught, the man denied that he was responsible for all the drawings, and that his curious crime was inspired by having seen someone else do it first.

“The man has admitted to being behind these drawings, but not as many as 30. He has no prior convictions and he has explained that he did it because he had seen similar drawings in IKEA. He has regretted his actions, but that doesn’t change the fact that he has still committed vandalism,” Poulsen said.

The man received a suspended sentence of 20 days – and presumably a lifetime ban from IKEA.

Here’s the source.

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As a daily bicycle commuter, it pains The Juice to speak (ahem, “allege”) ill of a fellow traveler. Alas, it is not looking good for this gent, as reported by NJ Advance Media for NJ.com:

Jose Angel Perez-Luna, 31, Tannersville, Pa., was arrested early Sunday morning near the Holland Tunnel after a Port Authority police officer spotted a Citi Bike in the open bed of his pickup truck, police spokesman Joe Pentangelo said. At roughly 3 a.m., Perez-Luna had passed Lt. Joseph Macaluso and abruptly stopped at a red light at 14th Street and Jersey Avenue, Pentangelo said.

After noticing the Citi Bike, Macaluso stopped Perez-Luna, who explained that he stole the bike from Manhattan to commute to his job. The bike is valued at $1,000. Perez-Luna was also driving with a suspended license and had previously been cited in Virginia for unlicensed driving, Pentagelo said.

He was arrested and charged with receiving stolen property, driving while suspended, driving without a license and careless driving. He was also cited for failing to move over for a marked police officer, since he drove too close to Macaluso while the officer was stopped for an unrelated traffic matter.

Next time, how about Craigslist? Here’s the source.

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You know that when you point a gun in the air and shoot, that the slug will land somewhere, right? This is especially true when you fire a gun inside a building. As reported by The Bismarck Tribune:

A Bismarck man is accused of firing a shotgun into the ceiling of his apartment, nearly striking a woman who was lying in bed in the apartment above his.

Jeffery Royce Jr., 34, was charged in South Central District Court in Burleigh County with felony reckless endangerment and could receive up to five years in prison if convicted.

Police were called to a residence at  409 Riverside Park Road at 9:49 p.m. Wednesday after receiving a call about a possible gunshot inside an apartment.

Officers arrived and heard a man, Royce, arguing with a 33-year-old Bismarck woman, Bismarck Police Sgt. Mark Buschena said.

Inside the residence, police found a spent shotgun shell on the floor and a 12-gauge shotgun inside the bedroom, Buschena said. Officers also noticed a hole in the ceiling approximately 1 inch in diameter.

A 55-year-old woman who lives in an apartment above Royce’s said she was lying in bed when a slug shot through her floor just feet from her, landing inside the apartment’s outer wall.

Police arrested Royce and took him to Burleigh County Detention Center.

Missed it by that much. (For the “Get Smart” fans out there.) Here’s the source, which includes the suspect’s photo.

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This kid is Trouble. That capital “T” is intentional. Why? Check out what this youngster has been up to, as reported by wmbb.com (Florida):

Police say that a 12-year-old charged in June with stealing a school bus and taking it on a joyride has done it again.

Yes, again!

According to the Parker Police Department and Bay District Schools, 12-year-old Michael Propst is charged with taking a bus from a compound at Parker Elementary School and driving it to Franklin County Tuesday evening.

In June, Propst was charged with taking a bus and driving it from the same location to the Wal-Mart on Front Beach Road, a distance of 15 miles.

15 miles! Yikes. What about this time?

This time, the youth drove the bus to Franklin County, a distance of more than 55 miles.

Shazam!

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united nations building

Sir, your library card! Now! [Shredder sound in the background.] As reported by The Plymouth Herald:

Officers were called to the on campus library around 12pm after a 41-year-old man had reportedly exposed himself to a female library user.

A police spokesperson said: “Police received reports a male had indecently exposed himself to a female library user at Plymouth University.

“A 41-year-old man has been arrested and remains in police custody at Charles Cross station.”

According to eye-witnesses, on-site security detained an “older man” who claimed he was “researching about the United Nations (UN) in order to start a blog”.

Speaking to The Herald, one witness said: “I didn’t see the actual incident, but a girl had reported it to staff who alerted security.

“They are currently talking to the man. He’s using a guest pass, so I’m assuming he isn’t a student here.

“He told the security that he was researching the UN because he wants to start a blog.”

Here’s the source.

 

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Please, tell me you did not just shoplift while carrying coke in your purse.  As reported by Northwest Florida Daily News:

A Walmart Asset Protection Associate became suspicious of the woman, identified as Tammy Sarah King, around 2:30 p.m. on July 31 because she was “constantly twitching and looking over her shoulder,” according to the arrest report. The associate watched her place several grocery items in her cart.

She then tried to hide the items, worth $313.60, under an air filter before walking out of the store, the report said. She was stopped and Crestview Police officers were called.

King told officers that there was cocaine in her purse, according to the report. Officers found two grams of cocaine and $459 in her purse.  She is charged with retail theft over $300 and possession of cocaine, both felonies.

I told you not to tell me that! You’ll find the source, with Ms. King’s mugshot, here.

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If this is the way he treats his own cousin, strangers beware.  As reported in The Brooklyn Paper’s Police Blotter:

84th Precinct – Brooklyn Heights–DUMBO–Boerum Hill–Downtown

Two louts robbed a man outside a Smith Street convenience store on Aug. 15, and fled in a getaway car driven by the victim’s cousin, cops say.

The victim told police that as he was exiting the store near Warren Street around 10 pm, two men approached him, one with something that looked like a gun under his clothes.

The victim surrendered his phone to the miscreants, only to see the pair flee in a blue Jeep driven by his own cousin, according to a report.

Um, sorry cuz? On a positive note, the police have a line on at least one of the suspects!

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In Germany, wasting 1,200 bottles of beer has got to be a felony. Why would anyone do that? You won’t guess, so I’ll tell you, via nbcnews.com:

Thieves who broke into a shop in Muelheim, Germany, opened 1,200 bottles of Koenig Pilsener beer — but left the otherwise untouched containers stacked neatly in their crates and the amber brew inside to spoil.

Investigators were initially surprised to find that all of the opened bottles were of the same brand.

But they now believe the thieves were trying to win prizes offered through a brewery promotion.

The bottle caps had tokens printed on them — with some entitling the holder to tools and speakers.

Many of the caps weren’t winners and the thieves left bits of the metal strewn across the shop’s floor.

Marc Baron, a Koenig Brewery spokesman, said he found it “quite incredible” the someone would go to all such lengths to steal bottle caps.

“We have no way to track where the bottle caps were sold or in this case stolen, but we will now watch for someone who sends in an unusually high number of caps,” he said.

Why are you telling these miscreants how not to get caught? If they were going to send in a bunch of caps, they certainly won’t now! Here’s the source, including a photo of the “victims”.

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boy child car playing

Clearly this gentleman is not a regular Juice reader, or he may not have tried this stunt. (The Juice has posted stories similar to this.)  Sure, being drunk impairs your judgment, but to this degree? As reported by Albany Times Union:

Town police said a Saratoga Springs man had his 10-year-old drive his pick-up truck while he was sitting drunk in the passenger seat.

Stillwater police said they were contacted by someone on Saturday who saw a young child driving a truck on Route 9P. The truck pulled over for police, and it was found that a 10-year-old was driving while his father, John H. Barling, 46, was allegedly intoxicated in the passenger seat. The child was picked up by a family member, and Barling was charged with endangering the welfare of a child, a misdemeanor, and permitting unlicensed operation of a motor vehicle, a traffic infraction.

Barling was given an appearance ticket for town court, and Saratoga County Child Protective Services were contacted by police.

 

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punch fist

Everyone has been in those strip-of-four photos booths at some point, which means you all know it seems to take forever for the photos to emerge. Well apparently this dude forgot to grab his pix, and it’s gonna cost him! As reported by LancasterOnline.com:

A Lancaster man who fled the Chuck E. Cheese restaurant in Manheim after punching another parent there was identified and charged by police because of a photo he left behind at the scene.

Joel Ramos, 21, of Fairview Avenue, was charged with simple assault and disorderly conduct in connection with the Aug. 9 incident.

Manheim Township police said Ramos allegedly got into an argument at around 7 p.m. with a Lititz man over the behavior of Ramos’s child at the 2020 Fruitville Pike eatery.

“While the victim was sitting in a booth, Ramos punched him twice in the face, resulting in an injury,” police reported. “Ramos fled the store but was identified through a photo that was left behind and released to the media.”

The photo was left in a Chuck E. Cheese photo booth. Police said Ramos fled the scene on a black motorcycle.

Doh!  Here’s the source, which includes the photo that was left behind.

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