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The Juice is not supporting burglary. But if you’re going to destroy property to steal property, shouldn’t you at least steal stuff that is worth more than the cost of the damage you did to break in? This gent abides by no such rule.

You’ll find the source, the Jacksonville Sheriff’s Office, here.

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laser lasers

Sure, lasers are cool. Maybe point it on the floor and have your cat chase it around. Or just mess around with it inside. But whatever you, don’t do this! As reported by The Charleston Post and Courier:

A 33-year-old man will spend more than three years in federal prison after he admitted to shining a laser into the cockpit of two news helicopters.

3+ years! Sure the time is the worst thing, but what about the inevitable question: “So, what are you in for?”

Prosecutors said in a news release that Damien Conley pleaded guilty Tuesday to aiming a laser pointer at an aircraft and was sentenced to 37 months in prison.

Authorities say two news helicopters in the Upstate were flying over an interstate wreck in November 2013 when a laser was aimed into their cockpits. The pilots were able to maintain control.

Prosecutors say lasers can blind pilots or disorient them.

The specific federal law making it a crime to point a laser into an aircraft went into effect in 2013. It carries a maximum punishment of five years in prison.

Yikes. Here’s the source.

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What, you doubt The Juice? Besides, who could make this stuff up? As reported at theguardian.com:

A man who taxied his light plane down a main street in Western Australia’s Pilbara region and parked it outside a pub is expected to be charged.

Say what?

Newman police sergeant Mark McKenzie said the plane had its propeller running, its wings removed and was being steered by foot pedals on Friday.

The man parked the plane outside the Newman Hotel and was then interviewed by police.

“It was a pretty stupid thing to do,” McKenzie said.

Stupid is right. Why would you take the wings off of a plane? (joking)

“Kids were coming home from school. It could have been very ugly. All he needed was one gust of wind … because without the wings, it’s not stable.

“People think it was a bit of a laugh but it was very dangerous and we’re not very happy with it.”

McKenzie said police had examined the Road Traffic Act but would likely charge the man under the Criminal Code.

“I would assume there would be an offence under the Criminal Code that may fit the bill.

“I’m confident that he will be charged with something soon.”

Really? You can’t come up with anything? This might be heartening to his defense lawyer should he decide to fight whatever he is eventually charged with. Here’s the source, including a photo of the plane.

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squirrel squirrels

Come on. Zombies are so slow and easy to kill. But squirrels? Those little varmints are fast.  As reported at WashingtonPost.com

Ashburn [Virginia] , Partlow Road, Oct. 21. A caller reported that a squirrel was chasing and attacking children on a playground. An animal control officer observed the squirrel gather food and store it under a swing set. There was no sign of aggression. The officer told people there about wildlife hibernation habits.

Too much coffee? Too much TV? Too many shrooms? Anyway, here’s the source.

 

 

 

 

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referee ref football

It’s often said that security guards are wannabe cops. Have you ever heard that said about refs? Me either. But check this out, as reported by wwl.com:

An apparent argument over crowd control between high school football referees and members of the Covington Police Department led to the arrest of two members of the officiating crew.

You probably saw that coming. So what happened?

The incident happened at the Mandeville-St. Paul’s game at about 8:45 Friday night.

St. Paul’s Athletic Director Craig Ketelson told WWL’s Deke Bellavia, who was broadcasting from the game, that an argument between two referees and police that were providing security became heated.

Ketelsen said, “I have never seen anything like this before.”

And you probably won’t again …

Covington Police Captain Jack West told Deke Bellavia what officers say happened in the incident:

“Well, a referee asked a police officer to move some people back.  The police officer moved them back.  Another referee came up to the police officer and told him, ‘that’s not far enough.’  The police officer explained….would you please handle the game, referee the game, and we will handle the crowd for you. The second referee told the police officer, nose-to-nose with the police officer, ‘you’re out of the game…get outta here.’  And the police officer said, ‘excuse me sir, just referee the game, and we’ll handle the crowd.’  And he says ‘no, get out.  Get out now.’

West went on to say, “There’s several witnesses that stepped forward who stepped forward to say that’s what happened. So, the two referees have been arrested for public intimidation.”

Yes, the refs actually thought their authority was greater than the police officers controlling the crowd.

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angel

Why would your appearance require that you are always on your best behavior, or at least on the right side of the law? The answer will soon be abundantly clear.  As reported by The Northwest Florida Daily News:

Kenneth Dewain Parker was in an argument with a woman on Oct. 26, according to the arrest report. Parker was in an argument with the victim when he allegedly hit her in the face.

The victim also told Okaloosa County Sheriff’s deputies that she had bruises on her arms where Parker “forcefully grabbed her,” the report said. A witness, who had called deputies, described Parker hitting the victim.

Parker was gone when deputies arrived, according to the report. An automatic alarm went off at 1:03 a.m. on Oct. 27 at Thumbs Up Food Store in Fort Walton Beach because the glass had been “shattered.”

There’s more, but it doesn’t sound too unusual, right? So why does Mr. Parker have to behave like an angel? You need to see his photo. You’ll find it, and the source, by clicking here.

 

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car%20accident.jpg

While there is never a good time to be involved in a car accident, as will be made abundantly clear, some times are definitely worse than others. As reported at nj.com:

A 2002 white Mercury Mountaineer rolled over into the center grass median and struck the guardrail on July 29, with police and emergency workers responding around 12:56 p.m. Driver Paulette Murray, 48, of Brooklyn, N.Y., told police she failed to control the SUV after another car cut her off, authorities said.

Yikes, a roll over.

Items that had been inside the car before the accident were scattered at the scene, and the package of marijuana, police said, was lying where EMS and troopers were walking around.

Marijuana? How much marijuana?

At the scene, troopers said they observed [passenger] Douglas-Dawkins attempting to cover a damaged cardboard box with a blanket. The box contained a large package of marijuana with fabric softener inside to mask the smell, State Police said.

A large package you say. How large? 57 pounds large! Like The Juice said, not the best time to have an accident. You can read more, and see photos of the SUV and the scene here.

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no parking sign park

At some point in your time behind the wheel, you found a great parking spot and said “Wow, we couldn’t get any closer than this!” Well, you were wrong, as this gent proved. As reported by This Is Lancashire:

A driver has been arrested after his car ploughed into a pub in Bolton town centre.

The male driver of the silver discovery vehicle was arrested and led away from the scene of the crash, which occurred just after 5pm at the Dog and Partridge pub in Manor Street.

Onlookers said it looked as though people who were inside the building at the time of the smash kept the driver inside the pub until police could arrive and arrest him.

You’ll find the source, a photo of the scene, and a fair amount more on the story here.

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crowbar crow bar

A crowbar? Really? The Juice wouldn’t waste your valuable time on such an ordinary crime. Maybe a stapler, a tape measure, or a soda can? Nope. You would never, never, ever guess this woman’s weapon of choice. As reported at thelocal.de:

The mother entered the store at 4.25pm and asked to buy a breast pump, police reported.

The Juice can hear the cogs slowly beginning to turn in your brain.

But after handing over a €200-note to pay for her €20 purchase, she suddenly uncovered one breast and used her fingers to squirt milk from it at the pharmacist.

Bam!

She then rummaged through the counter display and went to a second cash register.

Ignoring the pleas of staff and customers to cover herself up, she again rooted through the counter displays and unleashed a fresh spray of milk.

Boom!

Apparently satisfied with her handiwork, she quickly left the pharmacy, leaving the breast pump behind.

The pharmacists only noticed that €100 was missing from their cash register some time later when counting the day’s takings.

Police believe the woman, who they described as having a “robust” figure, long dark hair tied into a ponytail and speaking an unknown language, stole the cash while customers and staff were distracted by her antics.

Officers described the woman’s antics as “almost unbelievable”.

Now that is one for the ages.  Here’s the source.

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cavity filling tooth teeth

Unfortunately, The Juice is not referring to the kind of cavity you get in your teeth. It’s a cavity you might use to try to smuggle drugs – in this case A LOT of drugs! As reported by The Jamaica Online Star:

The court was told that on October 17, approximately 3:10 p.m., [forty-three-year-old Kevin] Peart [from Birmingham, England] was preparing to board a flight to Birmingham at the Sangster International Airport, when an officer on duty noticed that he was behaving suspiciously.

If you were “carrying” what Mr. Peart was, it would be impossible to NOT behave suspiciously.

Peart was taken to an interview room, where he admitted to pushing 27 packages of cocaine into his anus. He was taken to another room where he subsequently passed out the packages, and when cautioned by the officer, he reportedly said, “I am not dealing.” He was then arrested and charged.

27! Click here for the source, which includes a photo of the half-pound haul.