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Now that is an interesting question, and not an academic one, for identical twins Gavin and Rhys Higgins, and for the alleged victim, Darryl Churchill. Per the Daily Mail:

Darryl Churchill had claimed that one of the twins set upon him after a dispute over a game of pool which he had refereed.

He told the court he was ‘punched and kicked’ and needed an operation to fix his nose after the alleged attack, but could not tell which brother was responsible because they look so alike.

And this went to trial why? Was the Cardiff Crown Court Judge supposed to flip a coin? Shockingly, the Higgins brothers …

… walked free today after a jury took less than a hour to acquit them over [the] rugby club altercation.

The jubilant pair were found not guilty of one charge each of assault causing actual bodily harm at a birthday party at their local rugby club.

What did the brothers have to say after the verdict?

Gavin said: ‘Me and my brother always seem to get dragged into trouble because we look alike. People are always mixing us up.

Um, okay. So that would mean one of you gets into trouble, and you both get “dragged” into it because it’s uncertain which one of you caused the trouble? Hmmm. That sounds familiar … Here’s the source, with photos of the brothers.

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You’re out for a bike ride, with a backpack full of tools. Is that a crime? Apparently it can be. As reported by The St. Petersburg Times:

Kurtis Martin was riding his bicycle Sunday night with no headlight, in an area hit by recent burglaries, with an open backpack full of tools, Pasco deputies said.

When a deputy pulled Martin over, he found the backpack contained several screwdrivers, a claw hammer, pliers, wire cutters and a machete, according to a Pasco County Sheriff’s Office report. The deputy asked what the tools were for.

You have to give this man credit for being honest, some of which you can deduct for failing to know about his right to not incriminate himself.

“I hadn’t stolen anything tonight,” replied Martin, according to the report. “I had the tools with me in case the opportunity arose. I was only scouting the area.”

Doh!

Martin, 36, of Lacoochee, was arrested on suspicion of possessing burglary tools. He remained in the county jail Monday afternoon in lieu of $5,000 bail.

Not being a criminal lawyer, The Juice did not know this was a crime. Did you? Here’s the source.

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The “Brown ‘N Serve” sausages were 98 cents in the aisle, but rang up at $1.00. When it happened the second time, consumer activist Mary Bach resorted to a familiar remedy – court. Wal-Mart said the overcharge was a mistake. What did the judge say? Per The Tribune-Review:

Murrysville District Judge Charles Conway sided with Bach in her civil lawsuit alleging unfair trade practices. He awarded Bach $100 in damages, plus about $80 in court costs.

Said a victorious Bach:

“Wal-Mart abandoned an earlier chainwide practice of offering scanner guarantees — for no explainable reason — and they also appear not to be following established store procedures for correcting scanner errors when customers report them. This also was occurring at two other stores, in Greensburg and North Versailles.” Wal-Mart has 30 days to appeal to Common Pleas Court.

You can read more (a lot) here.

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You will be not be surprised to learn that Mr. William Ernst (who owns a bunch of convenience stores called QC Mart) was known by some as the “boss from hell.” A recent brainstorm to make the case? How about a memo titled “New Contest – Guess The Next Cashier Who Will Be Fired!!!”? As reported by The Des Moines Register, here’s what the memo said:

“
To win our game, write on a piece of paper the name of the next cashier you believe will be fired. Write their name [the person who will be fired], today’s date, today’s time, and your name. Seal it in an envelope and give it to the manager to put in my envelope.

“Here’s how the game will work: We are doubling our secret-shopper efforts, and your store will be visited during the day and at night several times a week. Secret shoppers will be looking for cashiers wearing a hat, talking on a cell phone, not wearing a QC Mart shirt, having someone hanging around/behind the counter, and/or a personal car parked by the pumps after 7 p.m., among other things.

“If the name in your envelope has the right answer, you will win $10 CASH. Only one winner per firing unless there are multiple right answers with the exact same name, date, and time. Once we fire the person, we will open all the envelopes, award the prize, and start the contest again.

“And no fair picking Mike Miller from (the Rockingham Road store). He was fired at around 11:30 a.m. today for wearing a hat and talking on his cell phone. Good luck!!!!!!!!!!”

As a result of this wonderful team-building contest, several workers quit. When they sought unemployment, the boss fought it and … lost!

Administrative Law Judge Susan D. Ackerman sided with the workers, calling the contest “egregious and deplorable.” Shelsky was awarded unemployment benefits.

“The employer’s actions have clearly created a hostile work environment by suggesting its employees turn on each other for a minimal monetary prize,” Ackerman ruled. “This was an intolerable and detrimental work environment.”

That’ll probably be the end of the contests, at least for a little while.

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Yes, folks, this bird is protected by the Constitution, as the City of Pittsburgh learned the hard way. Back in 2006, David Hackbart (of Butler, Pennsylvania) flipped off a cop, and got a disorderly conduct citation. He fought it, hard. Per the Pittsburgh Tribune-Review:

Pittsburgh City Council initially approved today a $50,000 settlement for a lawsuit filed by a Butler County man who gave the middle finger to a motorist and a police officer in 2006.

The officer cited him for disorderly conduct. The county eventually dropped the charge, but Hackbart sued to recover the cost of defending himself. U.S. District Judge David S. Cercone ruled in March that the officer violated Hackbart’s First Amendment right to free speech.

You can read more bird-flipping stories here, here, here, and here

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Nobody likes packing for a move. A Florida family, though, would be thrilled to pack. The problem is, there’s virtually nothing to pack. Why? As reported by nbc-2.com:

Denisse Velez was out of town looking for a new place to live when burglars pulled a truck up to her house and stole nearly everything from her home …

What does “nearly everything” include?

…the family’s electronics, furniture, tools, kitchen appliances [including the a/c unit and air-handler], washer and dryer, all the children’s clothing and toys – even their bicycles.

Children’s toys and clothes? How do you do that? Here’s the sadly ironic reason nobody was home during the burglary:

Two weeks ago, the mother of 7 decided she didn’t want to live in her neighborhood anymore because of all the crime in the area. She went to Tampa looking for a new place to live.

Here’s the source, including a news video about the incident.

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Maybe, maybe when the police find a body, they miss a small stab wound. But, and this a big “but,” what if the knife is still in the body? Could they miss it? Yup. As reported in The Medway Messenger:

Police failed to spot a dead pensioner had been murdered – until undertakers found a knife in his back, an inquest heard.

Officers were called to the home of Antoine Denis, in New Road, Chatham, after neighbours raised the alarm.

The 66-year-old was pronounced dead by a police nurse when he was found slumped on his bedroom floor.

But an inquest was told the weapon and a stab wound were only found by undertakers as they prepared to move his body on January 9.

DC [Detective Constable] Linda Robb told coroner Roger Sykes the knife was missed because it was dark in the flat and Mr Denis was lying on his back.

What, you expected the police officer to turn the body over? Don’t be ridiculous.

Recording a verdict of unlawful killing, Mr Sykes said Mr Denis had died from a single stab wound, which penetrated his lung due to “the unlawful act of a person whose identity has not yet been established”.

The perp? Still at large.

Kim Albone, of Luton Road, Chatham, was charged with murder on January 21, but was later released after a decision by the Crown Prosecution Service. Officers are still hunting Mr Denis’ killer.

Here’s the source.

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This is just gross – really, really gross. A guy broke into two separate cars and, well, you’ll have to hear it from The Star-Ledger (via nj.com):

Twice in one night, a burglar entered cars in Carteret, ransacked the vehicles and then defecated inside, according to police.

How would you like to be the police officer who catches this case? “Yeah, we’ll need some of that for DNA testing.”

On Tuesday night, an intruder entered a 2005 Chrysler Pacifica parked on Park Avenue, grabbed a GPS unit, and before leaving, relieved himself on the backseat, police said.

The same night somebody entered a 2007 Toyota Camry parked on George Street. Nothing was taken, but the burglar also relieved himself on the rear seat, authorities said.

Not cool, dude. Not cool. (It reminds The Juice of a certain Seinfeld episode.)

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To look at this 79-year-old gentleman, you wouldn’t think that he’s capable of what he’s been charged with. As reported by wdrb.com (Louisville, Kentucky):

According to an arrest report, the alleged victim was pulling out of his driveway in the 9800 block of Fairmount Road, just west of Old Bardstown Road, when James W. Handy [age 79] threw coffee on him through his open car window.

Not cool. But wait.

The victim quickly stopped his car and got out, “to ask what the problem was.” Police say Handy quickly replied by smashing the coffee mug against the man’s head. Handy then allegedly cut up the victim’s arm with the broken handle.

Okay. There has got to be some serious history between these two.

When police asked Handy why he did it, he allegedly told them that, “he owed it to him” and that the victim “was staring at him.”

Police say Handy added that he would do it again, too, if the victim “looked at him.”

Perhaps that’s setting the bar a little low for a beat down?

Handy was arrested and charged with second-degree assault.

Here’s the source.

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After getting sentenced to 10 years for robbery, like Mr. Taylor, I’m sure you wouldn’t be in the best mood either. Still, you better be prepared to pay the price if you lay into the judge, as Mr. Taylor did. Here are excerpts from the decision by the Superior Court of New Jersey, Appellate Division:

Defendant appeals from his conviction for second-degree robbery … his sentence on that charge, and the imposition of two consecutive six-month sentences for contempt …

Did someone say “contempt”?

When the court asked defendant if he understood his appeal rights, defendant responded by stating, “Yeah, I understand that you all railroaded the shit out of me. That’s what I understand.”

Uh-oh.

Although his attorney attempted to calm him down and the court attempted to resume asking him if he understood his right to appeal, defendant persisted in confrontational behavior, stating, “you’re all — so full of shit.” The court warned defendant that he would impose an additional six months for contempt of court. Defendant was defiant, stating, “Add six. What the fuck I care now.”

This reminds The Juice of a truly classic, early Juice post …

The court warned defendant again about imposing six months for contempt. Defendant replied, and repeated, “Fuck contempt of court.” Both his attorney and a court officer attempted to calm defendant down. The court said, “I’m going to give you one opportunity —” but defendant interrupted, “Give me — give me — don’t give me shit, mother fucker. Do what the fuck you’ve been doing to every black mother fucker that come in this courtroom.”

Defendant continued to interrupt the court, repeating, “Fuck you” three times, calling the judge a “crazy ass mother fucker,” telling him, “Eat shit and bark at the moon, sorry son of a bitch.” When the judge said he was going to place on the record his reasons for imposing an additional six month sentence, defendant interrupted again, stating “[i]s that all you’re going to put on it, the six months?” He continued to interrupt and taunt the court, saying, “Keep adding six months then” and “well shut the fuck up and do . . . what you’re going to do.”

Yikes.

The court proceeded to set forth the acts it deemed contumacious as the basis for imposing an additional sentence of six months. Defendant continued to interrupt. The court noted further that this exchange occurred in a courtroom filled with fifty people.

After the court ordered defendant to be remanded, defendant replied, “Fuck you, bitch” and then stated “Suck my ass, you cracker bitch.” The court had him returned to counsel table and imposed an additional six months for contempt, to be served consecutive to the prior sentences. After remanding defendant once again, the court noted that defendant “held up his left hand with the middle finger extended in a gesture[.]”

So how do you think the appellate court ruled? Affirmed. The case is STATE v. TAYLOR, No. A-3326-09T2, Superior Court of New Jersey, Appellate Division. (August 24, 2011). You can read the opinion on Leagle here.