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One of Kansas Judge Rebecca Pilshaw’s bad days (no, that’s not her above!) came as she was trying to empanel a jury in a murder case. Loyal readers know the Juice hates jury weasels. But nobody hates folks who try to avoid jury duty more than judges. There was a little of that going on. As reported in The Kansan:

One prospective juror said she wouldn’t believe anything the police said. Pilshaw dismissed her from service, but ordered her to attend every day of the trial because, “You need an opportunity to be exposed more to our law enforcement personnel.”

Then Judge Pilshaw lost it (at least, for a judge, this is considered losing it) and said:

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Englishman Elliot Carnell caught one hell of a break. After drinking 15 pints of beer at a Christmas party, Carnell punched his ex-wife’s Sri Lankan boyfriend in the head – 6 times! Oh, and he hit his ex-wife and her daughter when they tried to stop him. Carnell copped to the racially aggravated assault, and was sentenced to 150 hours community service and alcohol counseling. But wait …

As if that sentence wasn’t light enough, it gets worse. When Carnell showed up to begin his community service (picking up litter), he was ordered to stop! Why? Because he’s a truck driver, and officials were concerned that, with the additional work [the community service], he would exceed the maximum of 48 hours per week for a truck driver! And he might be tired and get in an accident. Said Mr. Carnell:

I was a bit bewildered by what happened but I’m happy. I was willing to do the punishment.

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The Juice’s first reaction upon reading about this was OUCH! (That’s a piercing needle pictured above.) This was followed by OUCH OUCH OUCH OUCH OUCH! That had to hurt – a lot. For a whole bunch of reasons, this dude has to be regretting the piercing. From a report in The Jersey Journal:

A Belmar man was arrested in Downtown Jersey City after allegedly masturbating in front of a sharp-eyed 76-year-old woman who helped identify the man by telling police she noticed his penis was pierced, officials said.

Lionel B. Froloff, 32, was arrested in Hamilton Park at 2:26 p.m. Monday and charged with lewdness and endangering the welfare of children in a nearby playground, reports said.

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You’re trying to sleep, and there’s a loud party [that they didn’t invite you to!], or your neighbor is playing loud music, or [fill in the blank] is keeping you awake. You’re mad. You rarely get justice. You’ll probably like this one, as reported by NorthCountryNow.com (Potsdam, New York):

A Parishville man was charged with unnecessary noise for yelling unreasonably loud early Wednesday morning, according to Potsdam police.

Nicholas J. Avery, 23, was issued an appearance ticket at 12:28 a.m. for the above charge after officers observed him yelling on the corner of Raymond and Market streets, police said.

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Unless it’s a traffic ticket where you don’t have much to lose, it’s just not a good idea to represent yourself.  This point is made over and over by cases like this. As reported by Courthouse News Service:

On trial for mail and wire fraud, fallen real estate mogul Luke Brugnara [who is representing himself] blamed his treatment at the Alameda County jail for his bizarre behavior in court and demanded that U.S. District Judge Alsup allow this explanation to be given to the jury.

“If I were in the jury box, I’d think this guy is nuts,” Brugnara said, launching into a rant about how he has not been allowed to shower or shave for five days and that deputies are trying to prevent him from preparing for trial by repeatedly throwing his legal papers into garbage bags.

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Who would have thought anything of importance would happen because of an online comment? Well, it did! As reported by arstechnica.com (from a Highlands County Sheriff’s Office press release):

A Florida woman used the comments section of a Pizza Hut order made from her smartphone on Monday afternoon to alert authorities that she and her children were being held hostage. When police responded to her message, arriving at the location, she and her children were quickly released, unharmed, and the kidnapper was arrested.

According to a Highlands County Sheriff’s Office press release, Cheryl Treadway, a woman from Avon Park, about 85 miles southeast of Tampa, had been arguing most of the day with her boyfriend, Ethan Nickerson, who carried “a large knife.”

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Anyone over the age of, oh, maybe 6, knows that sometimes kids say things that aren’t true for a variety of reasons. A Kansas City mom took her 6-year-old son at his word, and she ran with it. The Juice is here to tell you, that was a HUGE mistake. As reported by KCTV:

An angry mother confronted her son’s teacher and hit her in the face, jerked her hair and rammed her head against a file cabinet, according to a Kansas City Police Department report.

Bam! That teacher must have done something really awful to the boy right? Here’s how it started.

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When you think of road rage, you think about aggressive driving, or maybe even someone pulling a weapon, right? But this? You would not think of this. Ever. Per BeeNews.com (New York):

Police responded to a road rage incident on Union Road. Reportedly, two motorists were spitting on each other after following each other around town.

The Juice can think of worse ways to settle disputes.

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No offense to all of The Juice’s white Mercedes-Benz-driving readers out there, but, given the headline, is it any surprise that the perp drove away in a white Mercedes-Benz? Out of the 62nd Precinct (Bensonhurst—Bath Beach) via brooklynpaper.com:

A disgruntled customer battered a cashier with a box of Lipton Iced Tea at a New Utrecht Avenue supermarket after she refused to ring up his purchases on Feb. 10, police stated.

The victim told cops she closed the line at her register at the store between 81st and 84th streets at 5:30 pm and told the would-be patron that she would be unable to check him out.

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This case certainly highlights how different cultures can be. As reported at arabtimesonline.com, in Kuwait City …

The Undersecretary of the Interior Ministry Lieutenant-General Suleiman Al-Fahd has ordered the detention of a police officer in the rank of Major for growing his beard without permission, reports Al-Rai daily quoting knowledgeable security sources. The source said Al-Fahd has also warned a lieutenant-colonel for the same reason and has issued strict instructions that disciplinary action will be taken against those who violate the laws especially if they grow beards more than 1.5 centimeters long.

Maybe he thought they wouldn’t notice? He measured wrong?

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