Articles Posted in Juice Drops

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litter trash can

Have you EVER heard of anyone getting a ticket for littering? They should, but it just never seems to happen, much to The Juice’s chagrin.  Well, a litterbug in New York got busted, sort of. As reported by brooklynpaper.com:

The litterbug told police that he tossed some trash in the parking lot of a fast-food chain between Kingsland and Morgan avenues at 12:50 pm. A moment later, two men came up to him and showed him shields.

Officer, arrest that man! He just admitted to littering! No?

“Hold on,” said one of the men. “What you are doing is illegal.”

Citizen’s arrest! Citizen’s arrest! (This is funny only to geezers like The Juice who watched The Andy Griffith Show.) Sadly, there was no citizen’s arrest, but there was a little bit of strange justice doled out.

The fake cops told the man that they would write him a ticket if he did not give them $60 on the spot. They followed him to his house, but he could not find any money there, so they walked him to an automatic teller machine, where he withdrew $60 and gave it to the men, the real cops reported.

Bam! $60 fine!

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bottle rocket

Ah the joy of setting off a bottle rocket – unless it’s in … your pants! As reported by The Highline Times (Washington):

Police responded to a call for medical assistance in the 12000 block of Ambaum Blvd. A man accidentally set off a bottle rocket firework in his pants. He was transported to Harborview by ambulance to be treated for superficial burns on his groin, face and hand. No other injuries were reported.

Oops.

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loud music

If you’re neighbor asks you to turn down your window-shaking music and you don’t, you’re just a jerk. If a cop asks you and you don’t? You’re just not real smart.  As reported by The Review (East Liverpool, Ohio):

Sgt. Steve Boyd was called to 28290 Buffalo Road, Kensington, at 10:13 p.m. Saturday for a report of music so loud it was shaking nearby windows. Boyd stopped on the roadway and the music shook the windows of his patrol car. Steven J. Paul, 47, and Dawn Marie Johnson, 43, were arrested for persistent disorderly conduct after Boyd warned them to turn the music down and they did not.

Hey, maybe they couldn’t hear the officer! Huh? What?

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silly string

Regular Juice readers may remember this post about a law in Terrebonne Parish, Louisiana that prohibited the sale of silly string within three hundred (300) feet of any parade route within the parish on any day a parade is scheduled.

So, no selling of silly string, only on parade days, and only within 300 feet of the parade route. Well sir, that kind of leniency toward the devil that is silly string will not be tolerated in the town of Hopkinton, Massachusetts! For in that town, you may not sell or use silly string EVER. To wit:

ARTICLE I

Plastic String and Streamers

[Adopted 6-11-1990 ATM, Art. 26]

~ 154-1. Sale and use prohibited.

No person shall sell or expose for sale, use or cause or permit to be used any product designed to project a string or streamer of plastic material.

HT to The Hopkinton Patch for this tidbit.

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drinks drunk

How drunk was he? Pretty darned drunk. Per The New Hampshire Union Leader:

Authorities received a call from a Kingston Court homeowner who reported that a man she did not know had walked into her bedroom.

Uh-oh.

Police responded to the home and found [Ryan] Maszczak [35] asleep in a bed, according to a release.

“Maszczak was intoxicated and appeared to have walked into the wrong residence,” police said in the release.

Oops. The charges?

He was arrested [for criminal trespass] and later released on $1,000 personal recognizance bail. He will be arraigned Aug. 9 at the 9th Circuit Court, Merrimack District Division.

Can’t think of a defense for this one, although to be fair to Mr. Maszczak, The Juice is a personal injury lawyer, not a criminal lawyer.

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no spitting spit

A Minnesota man was thinking no such thought as he got ready to … spit! And he paid the price. As reported by www.kare11.com (Minneapolis):

“I was walking to get some pizza with some buddies,” Thomas said.

The 21-year-old said he was getting over an illness and he spit as he was walking. He quickly learned that’s illegal in Minneapolis.

He must have been really surprised when the police officer warned … wait, he didn’t get a warning?

Police officers driving by in Dinkytown cited him for spitting, which carries a hefty fine. According to the city ordinance if you spit on sidewalks, bus or public areas it’s a $115 misdemeanor.

That could fill the coffers pretty fast, assuming the miscreants pay.

Thomas calls the law “wacky” but he’s sucking it up will pay the fine.

Here’s the source, including a photo of Mr. Thomas.

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pills drugs

You know how when you watch TV shows about jail or prison, the joints are filled with contraband? Well, it’s true. Some prisons have such a problem with prisoners using cell phones that they have to jam them! As for drugs in the joint, here’s an example, as reported by North Country Now (Potsdam, NY).

St. Lawrence County Sheriff deputies say they charged a St. Lawrence County Correctional Facility inmate with felonies for allegedly selling drugs while locked up.

Matthew J. Hough is charged with fourth-degree criminal sale of a controlled substance and first-degree promoting prison contraband, both felonies.

Deputies said he was allegedly found in possession of a narcotic drug and allegedly provided it to other inmates.

Hough was arraigned in Canton Town Court and sent back to the jail, deputies said.

Here’s the source.

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turtle

Fans of the Maryland Terrapins have a saying: Fear the Turtle. In this case, it has to be altered slightly: Fear the Turtle’s Owner.  As reported by The Palm Beach Post:

On Tuesday morning, Palm Beach County Sheriff’s deputies were called to the 500 block of West Kalmia Drive, just east of Old Dixie Highway between Northlake Boulevard and Park Avenue in Lake Park.

[Marie] Seymour [age 53] and her boyfriend were drinking when he said he would harm her turtle and allegedly came after her, according to her recount of the events. The turtle’s name was not released.

You did not just threaten the lady’s turtle. Are you insane?

Seymour said that in defense, she took out her knife and stabbed him, according to the report. It’s not clear where Seymour stabbed her boyfriend.

When deputies arrived, the boyfriend told authorities he did not want Seymour to go to jail.

While he was treated for his injuries at a hospital in Palm Beach Gardens, Seymour was taken to jail for booking.

The charges?

Marie Seymour faces charges of aggravated battery with a deadly weapon. She was released from the Palm Beach County Jail under supervised conditions.

Here’s the source, including a mug shot

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OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

For offenses involving socks, two British men were sentenced to 18 months in jail (for “conspiring to commit acts of gross indecency”), and put on the sex offenders’ registry for 10 years.  Per The Southport Visiter:

Two men swindled hundreds of people in Southport out of their socks back in the 1990s.

How do you “swindle” folks out of socks?

Claiming to be collecting the socks for good causes, the men approached unsuspecting victims in the resort’s bars and clubs and paid revellers up to £5 for their footwear.

Creepy.

They made sure to take pictures of the victims with their socks and then meticulously tagged each pair with the donor’s name before wrapping them in sandwich bags.

Creepier. Guess what the police found at one of the dude’s flat?

… 4,000 pairs in binbags in a cupboard. Officers described their astonishment when they found they had to wade through an 18 inch deep “carpet” of smelly socks. “They were everywhere and anywhere,” an officer said.

“They were all over the furniture, hanging from lampshades and even in the microwave, frying pan and cooker.”

“It was like there had been an explosion in a sock factory and socks had blown all over the place. In my 25 years with the police I have never seen anything like it.”

Yikes.