Articles Posted in Juice Drops

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duel

The most important rule regarding any form of communication is thus: “Would I mind if this was out there for the whole world to see?” Well, in retrospect, I think this fellow would mind. As reported by patch.com:

A Crystal Lake lawyer mocked the size of a client’s penis and challenged him to a duel, according to a complaint filed by the Illinois Attorney Registration & Disciplinary Commission.

Attorney Donald Franz called client Mike Rutkowski a “small penis a——e” and “insulted Rutkowsky’s manhood and choice of automobiles,” the complaint said.

Franz also allegedly sent an email to Rutkowski that said, “My mistake, there is only one man involved between us. I challenge you to a duel, you pick the time, place and manner.”

Franz and Rutkowski were in a dispute over $400. Franz had billed that amount for his “efforts to reduce the assessed value of real property (Rutkowski) had recently purchased,” the complaint said.

In his answer to the complaint, Franz admitted to the “general characterization” of the small-penis quip but “denies insulting Rutkowski’s manhood or choice of automobiles.” He also said the duel challenge was taken out of context.

The entire message reads: “Can you please tell me where you would like to be served? Fee agreements are not required in these matters and not between men. My mistake, there is only one man involved between us. I challenge you to a duel, you pick the time, place and manner. I choose small claims court. See you very soon. Don,” Franz said in his answer.

“In its totality, the email is not a threat of violence or challenge to a duel, it is a threat to sue in small claims court,” he said.

Alrighty then. Here’s the source.

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If you thought you could find an expert on anything, you would be wrong.  As reported by HurriyetDailyNews.com:

A Turkish judge has taken full responsibility in a pornography case while acquitting the investigation’s suspects after the court failed to find an “expert on artificial vaginas.”

You’re probably wondering why the judge would need such an expert, aren’t you?

Daily Hürriyet learned that the 26-year-old suspect, a businessman identified as Emre Ş, started to import realistic vaginas and other sex toys into Turkey two years ago. The second suspect, 29-year-old Kadir P., published the photographs of the products on his website for marketing purposes.

The Telecommunications Directorate (TİB), however, took action against the men.

Yes, action had to be taken.  If not, who knows. Those things could end up taking over … their owners’ …

The TİB, which was granted the authority to monitor Internet users and block websites and their content without court permission last year, filed criminal complaints against both men. After the investigation, the prosecutor asked the court to sentence both men to between six months and three years in jail, beside a hefty fine, claiming that they committed the crime of “publicizing obscene graphics, texts or remarks.”

That’s not nothing. But …

The Criminal Court of First Instance at the Anadolu Courthouse in Istanbul acquitted both suspects on July 1.

According to the ruling seen by daily Hürriyet, the judge stressed that he evaluated the artificial vagina “with his own general knowledge” because the court failed to find an expert whose specialty covers the domain.

As such, the judge added, Turkey’s criminal law does not specify which products should be considered obscene, which led him to issue the ruling that acquitted the suspects, who had imported the sex toys legally and advertised them with a parental advisory on their marketing website.

Phew. Back to business. Speaking of business …

More than 81,000 websites, most of them pornographic, are currently blocked in Turkey. According to the monitoring website Engelli Web, 93.6 percent of these websites were blocked by the TİB without a court order.

No court order? Sounds a little extra-judicial. Here’s the source.

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Malcolm Williams came to the Houston County Courthouse to pay some fines and to report to his probation officer. When he emptied his pockets before going through the metal detector, as reported in the Dothan Eagle:

…out spilled two baggies of marijuana along with a wad of cash and a cell phone.

Doh! And you know what else he had on him? A pocket knife and rolling paper. Oops. Deputies tased him, but it didn’t work because of his clothing. Mr. Williams was otherwise subdued and taken into custody, where he is looking at not just probation violation, but a few new charges too.

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Okay, so we’re not talking about the mailman. Surely the newspaper delivery guy is close enough? As reported by ktuu.com:

An Anchorage Daily News deliveryman has been charged with two counts of driving under the influence after his pickup truck slid off the road in Chugiak Wednesday morning — and police found him trying to finish his route in another vehicle.

APD responded at about 6:45 a.m. to a report of a brown Ford pickup with its rear wheels in a ditch creating a traffic hazard at Birchwood Loop and Spruce Crest Drive.

When police arrived, 54-year-old Clifford Johnson was emptying newspapers wrapped for delivery from the pickup into a red Chevy Blazer. Johnson said he’d accidentally backed his pickup into the ditch at about 5 a.m.

In addition to having a strong smell of alcohol on his breath, Johnson was spilling papers onto the ground and had trouble hitting buttons on his cell phone. After field sobriety tests, he was arrested on two counts of DUI — one for each of the two vehicles involved.

“He was just trying to get his papers in,” said APD spokesperson Lt. Dave Parker. “It’s just not something to do intoxicated.”

A breath sample from Johnson yielded a blood-alcohol content reading well over the .08 legal limit, and he was jailed on $250 bail. Both of his vehicles were impounded by police.

 

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Close up of a mobile phone with a touch screen. Focus is on the phone with small DOF.

 

Court after court has held that you can f-bomb the police.  Depending on the situation, it may be totally disrespectful and rude, or it may be justified and appropriate. Regardless, it is constitutionally protected.  Of course, that doesn’t mean the police can’t charge you, or that a state court can’t convict you, but you will eventually be vindicated.

So this gent, Mr. Buehler, was recording a proceeding in court. The judge was not pleased, although it appears Mr. Buehler was legally permitted to record. A kerfuffle ensued, and just when you thought it might be over …  As reported by PINAC (photographyisnotacrime.com):

As [Gonzalez Police Captain Gayle] Autry turned around to return to the courthouse, a sarcastic “have a nice day” was exchanged between the cop and one of Buehler’s associates.
Buehler then told him to “go fuck yourself” as he was walking away, prompting Autry to turn around, pull out the handcuffs and arrest Buehler for disorderly conduct, even though numerous court decisions have ruled that using profanity against a cop is protected by the First Amendment.

Judge Voigt later denied Buehler’s motion to recuse herself from presiding over the subsequent trial given her involvement leading up to his arrest.

Buehler defended himself in court on June 5, 2013 and was found guilty after a 7-hour trial presided by the biased Judge Voigt.

He immediately appealed the decision and was granted a new trial with a new judge, who hopefully understands Constitutional law better than Voigt.

You can read a ton more here.

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People use the words “chicken shit” all the time. This fella, though, is accused of doing much more than using the words. As seen at todayskccr.com:

Prosecutors say [Tom] Parsons [49] , following a dispute with the county treasurer over a vehicle registration, placed the registration card in chicken feces and mailed the material to the official in a zip-lock bag.  The first-class mail piece was sent from the Pierre Post Office.

Brilliant! They’ll never trace it back to you… The plea?

Parsons entered the plea to a single count of Injurious Articles as Nonmailable Friday afternoon before U.S. Magistrate Judge Mark Moreno in Pierre Federal Court. A trial date has not yet been set.

In the mean time …

Following a discussion on conditions, Moreno released Parsons on a personal recognizance bond with supervision meaning he has to remain in contact with the parole office. Parsons also can have no contact with postal service employees except for regular transactions during the normal business day.

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Nobody can argue that the internet has dramatically changed the world. Some folks, though, turn to it when they ought to just do things the old-fashioned way. For example, there’s this woman in Santa Fe, Texas, as reported by kwtx.com …

Police in Santa Fe in Southeast Texas say the mother of a 14-year-old boy who was shot in the leg in a videotaped incident didn’t seek help for her injured son for seven hours while researching gunshot wounds online.

Say what?

Pete Jesse Rodriguez, 23, who was living at the family’s home, was jailed Thursday charged with injury to a child with intent to commit serious bodily injury, Santa Fe police said.

Capt. Wayne Kessler says the home’s security video shows Rodriguez playing with a gun Tuesday night, tracking the boy and firing.

And then …

Police say the mother and teenager checked WebMD.com before going to a hospital.

Really? Fortunately …

The boy was in stable condition …

Here’s the source.

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Nobody just walks into a dentist’s office and does this, except this guy. As reported by the Seattle Post-Intelligencer:

King County prosecutors claim James Pfitzner, Jr., provided his name, date of birth and Social Security number to an office manager at Aurora Dental Care, located in Seattle’s Greenwood neighborhood. Pfitzner, 43, is alleged to have started masturbating moments later.

Describing the May 20 incident, a Seattle Police Department detective said the office manager then shouted at Pfitzner and called 911. Police responded but couldn’t find Pfitzner.

The office manager identified Pfitzner after reviewing a photo montage, according to charging papers. She later recalled that Pfitzner helped her pronounce his last name while checking in.

Pfitzner, who appears to have been living in a Seattle homeless shelter, was arrested the day after the incident and has been jailed since.

Pfitzner has been charged with felony indecent exposure. He was convicted on two misdemeanor counts of the same crime in December after pleading guilty.

Yikes. Sounds like he needs some help, not jail time. Here’s the source.

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middle finger the bird flip flipping off

Regular Juice readers know that you have a first amendment right to flip off a police officer. That doesn’t mean you won’t be arrested and thrown in jail. It just means that ultimately you will prevail. Any way, the same does NOT hold true for Judges, as this gent learned. As reported by NewsLeader.com (Springfield, Missouri):

David Hernandez, 31, was arrested Wednesday at about 3 p.m. while in the audience of a court proceeding. According to the judge’s docket sheet, Hernandez disrupted the court three times.

“Upon Mr. Hernandez’s departure from the courtroom, in direct view of Judge (Todd) Thornhill, (defendant) flails his arms and then lifts both arms in the air and extends the middle finger of each hand in utter disrespect and contempt of court,” the docket sheet reads.

Hernandez was asked if there was any reason he should not be held in contempt and produced none, the docket sheet says. The court then found Hernandez in contempt and ordered him to jail until August 23. [a 30-day sentence]

A police incident report indicates Hernandez was booked without incident.

To his credit, Mr. Hernandez learned from his mistake, unlike this gent, or this one, or this one. Here’s the source.

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Urinating in public? Well I never! Okay, maybe just this once … or, maybe not. As reported by The Iowa City Press-Citizen:

An Iowa City Man was arrested for public intoxication at 10:40 p.m. Sunday after telling police the yellow liquid flowing through a handrail on steps leading to an apartment building was beer.

Told you it was novel, but …

… police say they saw the man urinate, pull up his shorts and no beer cans or bottles were located near him, according to a criminal complaint.

A post-arrest breath test showed Connor Thomas Glascott, 19, of 1956A Broadway St., had a blood-alcohol content of .249, according to police.

Yikes. That’s three times the legal limit in many states.

“The urine was seen flowing through the handrail. The defendant stated he was pouring out a beer,” the criminal complaint states. “There was no open beer can/bottle in the area the defendant was standing.”

Click here for the source.