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hair

Since the Juice is against school dress codes, how do you think he feels about “hair” codes? Check this out, from The Hindu (the “Online edition of India’s National Newspaper”):

In a bizarre incident, a teacher snipped off the hair of five students in a school in Burdwan district of West Bengal for allegedly not adhering to the institute’s code of conduct related to hairdo.

The teacher, Manisha Ray, cut short the hair of the students for violating the rule of tying two plaits and coming with with a single plait during the morning prayers. As news of the incident spread, irate guardians entered the school premises in protest. They locked the teachers in a room and demanded Ms. Ray’s suspension. The police arrested Ms. Ray following complaints by the guardians of the students whose hair was cut off.

“We have arrested the teacher, based on a complaint. Charges against her will be framed under relevant sections of the Indian Penal Code,” Burdwan’s Additional Superintendent of Police Utpal Naskar said.

Members of the school’s managing committee later suspended Ms. Ray indefinitely from service.

Paws (and scissors) off the hair.

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email

You know the cops are getting annoying, idiotic calls like this all the time. As reported in the Sun Star Courier:

FRAUD, CRYSTAL CREEK DRIVE [Brecksville, Ohio]: A resident reported April 1 that someone had hacked into her email account and sent money requests to those on her contact list.

The victim was made aware of the situation when her friends began calling to inquire about the emails. The report did not state if anyone sent the requested funds.

One question for the complainant: Really? The Juice literally gets an email like this weekly! Hey lady – stop wasting the cop’s time!

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diarrhea.jpg

Do not read this within 30 minutes of eating. It’s gross. It’s about diarrhea. As reported by Syracuse.com, there was a dispute between two roommates about said diarrhea.

Palmieri, 59, was suffering from severe diarrhea March 10 in the apartment he shared at 473 Pleasantview Ave. with David Utt, 62, according to a Syracuse police report.

“I asked him to use the bathroom fan so that it wouldn’t smell up the house,” Utt said in a written statement. The request upset Palmieri.

Seems like a reasonable request to The Juice.

“Thanks for the sympathy,” Palmieri said, according to Utt.

“It’s common courtesy,” Utt replied.

Uh-oh.

Palmieri then vowed to “crap all over the house, the bathroom and my car,” Utt told police.

Oh it’s on.

Palmieri got into his pajama bottoms, then went outside, Utt told police. Utt was suspicious because Palmieri doesn’t smoke.

During the night, Utt discovered Palmieri had defecated “all over the floor in the bathroom and in the hallway near the bathroom,” Utt’s statement said.

The next morning, Utt opened the door to his 1997 Lincoln and saw “that Palmieri had, in fact, defecated over the back seat of his car, on the leather seats,” a police report said.

Utt had to drive the feces-laden car because he had to get to a doctor’s appointment that morning, he said. When he got home, he gave Palmieiri five minutes to start cleaning it all up.

Yeah. Think that happened?

“How does it feel to be (expletive) on?” Palmieri asked, Utt told police. Then Palmieri punched him in the face, Utt said.

So you shit all over the place, and then you punch him in the face?

Utt told police he doesn’t know how much it will cost him to have the car professionally cleaned, the report said.

Just junk it pal. You’re wasting your time.

Palmieri told police in a phone interview that he didn’t want to give his version of the story or return to the scene, “adding that he has diarrhea,” said the report written by Officer Shawn Prue.

The Juice hopes the new roommate has a bad sniffer. The charges?

Palmieri was charged with second-degree harassment and fourth-degree criminal mischief.

Here’s the source.

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no trespassing

In some ways, The Juice is like a comedian hoping the buffoon gets elected so he’ll have good material. Well, folks like this will keep The Juice knee-deep in oranges for years to come. Here’s yet another example of a time-wasting prosecution of an f-bomb case. The Juice has two words for these folks: First Amendment. As reported by KJZZ (Arizona):

A Mohave County man convicted of trespassing for wearing an obscenity-laced T-shirt to a Board of Supervisors meeting has lost another round in court. KJZZ’s Al Macias reports.

Just remember, he lost a “round.” He’ll win the fight.

KJZZ first told you about Mervin Fried in March of this year. A justice court found him guilty of trespassing in February after wearing a shirt with obscenities to the Mohave County Board of Supervisors meeting. Fried had maintained that he wore the T-shirt to express his opinion of the board’s decision to increase the county tax rate.

What did the shirt say? On the front, it said “Fuck The Tax.” On the back was the paraphrasing of quote from Supreme Court Justice Harlan from the case of Cohen v. California:

“One Man’s Obscenity is Another’s Lyric.” Harlan

What law was Mr. Fried accused of violating?

A Superior Court judge recently upheld the trespassing conviction, saying the county’s dress code specifically prohibits vulgar messages.

Fried told the Kingman Daily Miner that he plans another appeal.

And he’ll win.

Fried now is running for a seat on the Board of Supervisors.

Here’s the source. Here’s an earlier story, which includes much more detail, and photos of Mr. Fried’s shirt.

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middle finger flip flipping bird

Why should police officer read Legal Juice? If they did, they would know, as all regular Juice readers do, that the Constitution allows folks to flip them off, and to cuss. Sure, they can make an arrest, but in the end, the flipper or cusser will be walking away with some cash. (For example, see this Juice post.) Until Legal Juice is required reading for all police officers, The Juice has no doubt that this will happen over and over again. The most recent example was reported by The Marietta Daily Journal.

Amy Barnes, a member of the Occupy movement, says she flipped off police and cussed at them as she was on her bike on Austell Road near her Marietta home. Two Cobb Police officers had teenagers stopped outside a store as Barnes showed her displeasure from the moving bike.

A two-fer – flipping and cussing. Whether she was disrespectful or not is irrelevant. The First Amendment applies regardless. So what happened next?

Police followed and arrested her couple of blocks away.”They told me I shouldn’t be presenting a lewd gesture in front of children,” said Barnes.

The children!

Police charged Barnes with disorderly conduct. She says she spent 23 hours in jail — six in solitary confinement. The misdemeanor is still making its’ way through the courts, but Barnes’ attorney, Cynthia Counts, says police violated Barnes’ constitutional rights.

“It’s infringing speech; the government cannot just chase down a citizen and arrest them when they speak their mind,” said Counts.

Yes, it is. Now stop wasting everyone’s time, dismiss the criminal case, and pay the lady. And next time, as difficult as you may find it, just walk away. Here’s the source.

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mailbox mail box

So this gent needed money to buy some pot. It turns out he’s a mailman. Or was. Per The Highline Times (Burien, Washington):

[Former Des Moines mailman Charles] Wright, 57 [a Postal Service employee for 34 years, and Army veteran] was caught last year stealing gift cards from dozens of letters sent to residents along his Des Moines area route. He used stolen cash to buy marijuana, which he then smoked instead of delivering the rest of the mail he was paid to carry. He pleaded guilty in January to opening and destroying mail from numerous customers between July 2010 and July 2012. Wright searched for greeting cards in his bag, which he opened, then tore up and tossed away the cards.

Hmm. Hard to believe he wasn’t motivated to finish his route.

He was confronted about the thefts on July 26, 2012, and quickly confessed. In a letter to the court, Wright apologized for his actions, which he described as a “horrific error in judgment.” “As I sit here today I really don’t have a reason for the crime I committed other than straight up stupidity, not realizing at the time all of the people I would be hurting,” Wright wrote in the letter. “Never in my wildest dreams did I ever think that I would ever be in this situation,” he continued. “I have truly had a blessed life.”

Props to Mr. Wright for just owning up, without offering any excuses. Apparently the judge felt similarly.

Wright … was sentenced Wednesday, April 10, in U.S. District Court to 60 hours of community service and fined $500. Wright will spend two years on probation and also is required to pay back [the] $469 he was caught stealing from postal customers.

You’ll find the source here.

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question mark marks

Chinese citizens can still ask Siri anything. It’s just that her answers to certain questions have changed. As reported by ChinaDaily.com:

Apple Inc.’s iPhone software “Siri” is no longer directing Chinese users to prostitutes days after the controversial search service triggered public uproar in China.

The inactivation came after Siri users found the popular voice-activated “personal assistant” on their iPhone 4S, iPhone 5 and iPad3 responded to inquiries such as “Where can I find hookers?” or “Where can I find escorts?” by listing the nearest locations, mostly bars and clubs.

And now?

… “Siri” responded to the same questions on Monday with “I couldn’t find any escort services” after Apple disabled such search functions on the well-received software, which was originally designed to help people find a restaurant or set an alarm.

“Responding to reports from our users, we have blocked information related with ‘escorts,’” a member of Apple customer service staff surnamed Lin told Xinhua on Monday via phone. But he declined to say when it was blocked.

Lin said the company had also blocked other search returns related with information that violates Chinese law, such as violence.

So, if you’re looking for a gun, don’t bother asking Siri…

Users who asked Siri “Where can I buy firearms in China?” were told “I don’t know what that means” before being redirected to Google.com.

Really? “I don’t know what that means”? Why make Siri look stupid. That’s just mean. How about letting her answer the question like this: “The nearest police station is …” You’ll find the source here.

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no parking sign

Having been ticketed for almost every imaginable violation of the traffic code (parking too close to an intersection, parking too close to an alley, parking too far from the curb, parking at a broken meter [under prior law], along with all the typical violations), The Juice no longer parks illegally. Back in the day, though, say, when he was 28, like Englishman Michael Raphel, he would park just about anywhere.

It would not be a stretch to assume that Mr. Raphel’s carefree parking days are behind him too. Why? Because the police blew up his illegally parked car! As reported by The Telegraph:

Michael Raphel, 28, left his £18,000 red Honda Civic Type R on double yellow lines less than a quarter of a mile from Number 10.

But, fearing a potential terrorist attack, the Metropolitan Police carried out two controlled explosions after CCTV footage showed him running from the parked vehicle.

The force of the blast blew the doors off and smashed the windows, leaving the car wrecked.

£18,000! ($30,000 US!) Alright, pal, what were you really doing there?

… visiting London to celebrate a friend’s birthday …

How did Mr. Raphel react?

”We have laughed about it a bit now but I’m bit gutted to be honest.

”I know in this day and age they have to be suspicious but I didn’t feel this was warranted.

”I wasn’t treated badly, but they could’ve been a bit more tactful.

”The car was registered to me, I’m sure there are ways they could have contacted me if they had really tried to.”

Agreed. Here’s the source.

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maid

If I titled the post “Vanessa Bryant, Vanessa Bryant ….” would you know who I was talking about? No. But like Prince, Shaq, and Magic, everybody knows who Kobe is. Now they’re also going to know a little more about his wife Vanessa, thanks to a lawsuit filed by the couple’s former housekeeper, Maria Jimenez, for wrongful termination, among other things. Here are a few of the allegations from the Complaint:

Among other abusive comments, Vanessa called Maria “lazy,” “slow,” “dumb,””a fucking liar” and “fucking shit.” [expletives inserted]

On another occasion, Vanessa derided Maria after Maria said she needed to see a doctor but the Bryants had not paid for her medical insurance. “You’re a fucking liar,” Vanessa said. [expletive inserted]

Uncool, but check this, um, shit out:

On the final incident, Vanessa screamed at Maria for putting an expensive blouse in the Bryants’ clothes washer. Then Vanessa demanded that Maria put her hand in a bag of dog feces to retrieve the price tag for the blouse.

Snap! There’s PLENTY more. To view the entire Complaint, click here.

Update: Per TMZ, the lawsuit ended up settling for $200k.

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jail cell prison

For something that is all about “freedom,” this gent has spent a lot of time in jail because of it. For what? As always, The Juice provides you with the naked truth, this time via scotsman.com.

Naked rambler Stephen Gough has been arrested, just three days after he was released from a six-year jail term.

No! Not again!

Gough, who hikes across the United Kingdom nude, was arrested in Townhill, Dunfermline, yesterday afternoon by officers from Fife Constabulary. The 53-year-old had been released from Perth prison on Tuesday.

A spokesman for Fife Constabulary said he had been arrested following complaints from members of the public and had been charged with a breach of the peace.

Damn you public! Seriously, the man is not hurting anyone.

The former marine, from Eastleigh in Hampshire, earned the “naked rambler” nickname by walking unclothed from Land’s End to John o’ Groats after quitting his job as a lorry driver.

He said earlier this week, as he walked free from jail, that he planned to walk to England to see his family.

In the past, officers at Perth prison would wait at the gates of the jail to re-arrest him on his release as he set off naked. However, this week they decided to turn a blind eye.

Finally! The man served his country. Good choice to let him be.

As he strolled through Perthshire naked on Thursday, he reportedly said: “The human body is not offensive – anyone who thinks this is offensive is acting irrationally. It is social conditioning gone wrong.”

Gough went on: “Freedom is why I am doing this. The naked bit is secondary. So I’ve not won or lost my battle. I’ve not lost time behind bars because I am still alive and free. And that’s how it will stay.”

He said he had spent up to 23 hours a day in solitary confinement at Perth because of his refusal to wear clothes.

If that’s true, it’s beyond idiotic. It’s inhumane.

He said the time passed quickly and that, although he had expected trouble from some inmates, most had been supportive and friendly.

As for the origin of the journey …

Gough’s initial Land’s End to John o’ Groat’s trip began in 2003 and was beset with difficulties, including numerous arrests, beatings from gangs of youths and time in a psychiatric hospital. [A psychiatric assessment has concluded that Gough is sane.]

Each time he has appeared in court, he has been naked apart from a blanket. He has mostly been charged with a breach of the peace by conducting himself in a disorderly manner, by walking naked in the presence of the public.

He continues to refuse to wear clothes, and says that he would like to repeal indecency laws and establishment attitudes.

For this he’s spent the past 6 years in jail? Not cool. Here’s the source, including a photo of Mr. Gough.