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snake snakes

Please, tell The Juice that this Connecticut legislator did not just push the button to talk and say that. Alas, he did. As reported by the The New London Day:

State Rep. Ernest Hewett, D-New London, was removed from his post as deputy speaker this week after making an inappropriate remark to a teenager testifying during a committee hearing.

Go on.

During a Feb. 20 Appropriations Committee hearing, a female 17-year-old ambassador for the Connecticut Science Center asked the committee to continue funding the center’s ambassador program.

During her speech, she said the program helped her overcome her shyness and get over her fear of snakes.

“I am usually a very shy person, and now I am more outgoing,” she told the committee. “I was able to teach those children about certain things like snakes that we have and the turtles that we have. … I want to do something toward that, working with children when I get older.”

Near the end of her speech, committee co-chairman state Rep. Toni Walker, D-New Haven, smiled at the girl and made a comment about how the teen was no longer shy.

All this talk about snakes, you can probably see where this is going.

Hewett, 56, recalled Thursday that he then pushed his microphone button to talk and said, “If you are shy, then I have a live snake under this desk.”

Wildly inappropriate does not begin to do justice to this colossally idiotic, insensitive remark.

According to an audiotape of the hearing, Hewett said: “If you’re bashful I got a snake sitting under my desk here.”

“What I meant to say was, if you are shy then I have an acre of land in the Everglades,” he said Thursday.

Did the spin work? Nope.

A spokesman for the Democratic caucus, Gabe Rosenberg, said that in reaction to the comment, Hewett has been stripped of his deputy speaker title. He will lose $6,446 from his salary, which means he will make the base legislative salary of $28,000, according to a legislative document.

And because of the incident, legislators who have not been through a sexual harassment training recently will have to take a refresher course, Rosenberg said. Freshman and sophomore legislators recently underwent training, he said.

You can read more (a fair amount) here.

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trust

So back in 1996, this couple in Arkansas set up a Trust. The beneficiaries were his 3 kids and her 3 nieces. Simple enough. Well, after Robert died, guess what Robena did? Kids? What kids? She amended the trust to exclude her deceased husband’s 3 kids, effectively disinheriting them. Surely they did not intend for something like this to be done when they set this thing up … or did they? Here’s the operative provision of the Trust document:

14. REVOCABILITY: The Donors, Robert F. Blann and Robena P. Blann, may, by signed instruments delivered to the Trustee during the Donors’ life: . . . (3) change the beneficiaries, their respective shares and the plan of distribution. . . .

It seems pretty clear to The Juice, as it did to the kids too, who went to court to have this amendment tossed. So what did the court say?

The judge said the language was ambiguous [wrong!] but ended up tossing the amendment on the grounds that, when they set the Trust up, Robert and Robena intended for changes in beneficiaries to be made by both parties.

Of course that’s what they intended! That’s what it says! “Donors’ life” means BOTH of them. So when the nieces appealed (like you didn’t see that coming), what do you think the Arkansas Court of Appeals said? Not surprisingly, they agreed with The Juice completely, finding that the Trust is not ambiguous at all, and telling the nieces to pound sand. Too bad they’ll still share in the Trust proceeds, albeit in smaller shares.

You can read the full opinion (Hartsfield, et al. v. Blann, et al.) here.

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Warning: Do not read this right before, or after, eating, because it’s really, really gross. Okay, here it goes, per The Standard, “China’s Business Newspaper”

A domestic helper has appeared in court accused of trying to injure her employer by mixing her menstrual blood in a pot of vegetables she was cooking.

You were warned …

In some Southeast Asian cultures menstrual blood is thought to have special magical powers.

Prosecutor Vincent Lee gave a statement to the court in which the Indonesian maid admitted under caution to mixing the blood with the vegetables in the belief that it would make her employer, surnamed Mok, “more amicable and less picky.”

Perhaps this is TMI, but here it is:

Mok [the employer] peered through the kitchen door and saw the helper acting suspiciously. She entered the kitchen and found the accused throwing something into the trash bin.

When Mok checked, she allegedly found blood clot-like substances mixed with the vegetables and water in the cooking pan.

She later discovered a used sanitary napkin in the bin and called the police.

The Juice won’t be eating for a few days. And just in case your appetite is not totally gone, The Standard also reports that:

Last year, a court in Saudi Arabia sentenced two Asian domestic helpers to four months in prison and 250 lashes each for contaminating the tea of their employer with urine and menstrual blood.

And …

In December 2007, another Indonesian domestic helper in Hong Kong added urine to the drinking water of her employer and his family.

She believed it would make the family treat her better. It was discovered after the family noticed a difference in the taste of the water. The maid was jailed for three months on a charge of “administering poison or other destructive or noxious things with intent to injure.”

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sweet and sour sauce

Even if you like sweet and sour sauce, ain’t no way you like it as much as this Washington State man. As reported by The Highline Times:

A man entered a fast food restaurant at the 14800 block of 4th Ave. S.W. asking for some condiments. The clerk told him no. That angered him so he pulled out a knife and demanded they hand over some sweet and sour sauce. There were no reported injuries and it was unclear if they had the suspect in custody.

Clearly a head-scratcher.

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You list a car on Craigslist, and get a check for almost twice the asking price. Are you suspicious? You should be. This scam has been around for a long time. As reported by The Times and Democrat (Orangeburg, South Carolina):

The victim said Thursday she listed her vehicle [on CraigsList] back in December. She said she was contacted online and via cell phone.

On Dec. 5, she received a check from someone in Cleveland for $2,200 for the vehicle. She was only asking $1,200, the report said.

HUGE RED FLAG!

The victim said she was instructed to deposit the check and then send the buyer $1,000 of it to pay for the towing, the incident report said.

Don’t do it! It’s a …

She said she sent $1,000 through Western Union to a woman in California on Dec. 16.

… scam!

The callers are still trying to scam her for more towing expenses, the victim said.

And why wouldn’t they? That’s what they do.

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It’s easy to play Monday-morning bird smuggler. But do you have any better ideas? From the L.A. Now blog (by Scott Glover) of the Los Angeles Times:

A man who allegedly flew from Vietnam to Los Angeles with 14 live birds hidden in his pants was one of two men indicted on smuggling-related charges today by a federal grand jury in Los Angeles.

Duc Le, 34, and Sony Dong, 46, are charged in an eight-count indictment with conspiring to smuggle dozens of birds into the United States, including red-whiskered bulbuls, magpie robins and shama thrushes.

Both men were arrested last month after investigators determined that Dong had 14 birds fastened to pieces of cloth around his calves, said Asst. U.S. Atty. Mark Williams. A subsequent search revealed dozens more illicit birds, officials said.

The photo is from the U.S. Attorney’s office.

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smiley face

It’s not uncommon for people to try to shoplift by putting items down their pants. But an entire rack of ribs? Twice? Truth, as reported by The Sentinel (Pennsylvania).

After going three months without getting in trouble, a Carlisle man was back in police custody Sunday afternoon after trying to steal a rack or ribs by sticking them in his pants.

Carlisle police said Donald Noone, 65, attempted to pull the same stunt on May 22 at the Giant on South Spring Garden Street.

This next bit will shock you.

Both times, Noone was found to be “highly intoxicated” when he tried to steal the meat, police said.

You can read more (a fair amount) here.

 

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It’s really nice when siblings hang out together. After this stunt, they’re going to be doing something else together that’s not so nice. As reported by the Monroe County Sheriff’s Office (Florida):

Two sisters from Miami were both arrested for driving under the influence of alcohol Saturday night because after being stopped by deputies, they switched seats in the vehicle they were traveling in.

That there was some quick thinking. Why settle for one DUI when you can get two?

Deputy Juan Martin-Reyes followed the Volkswagen northbound from the 23 mile marker to the 30 mile marker of the highway just before 11 p.m. He observed the vehicle swerving, increasing and decreasing speeds and braking suddenly. He turned on his lights and siren and the car stopped suddenly in the lane of traffic. Through the back window he could see the driver and passenger quickly switch seats.

Deputy Spencer Curry arrived as back up. The deputies had both 18 year old Steffany Miranda and 24 year old Vanessa Miranda perform field sobriety exercises. Both girls had trouble performing the exercises and were, according to the deputies, visibly impaired and smelled of alcohol.

And if you’re wondering how the second sister could get a DUI since the car was stopped …

Because both girls were, at some point, in control of the vehicle behind the steering wheel with the keys in the ignition, they were both charged with driving under the influence of alcohol.

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The source for today’s Juice? A Change.org petition that came The Juice’s way. No doubt this law will end homosexuality in Alabama… Clearly a class adhering to the requirements of this law cannot be called sex “education.” The law is Section 16-40A-2 of the Alabama Code:

MINIMUM CONTENTS TO BE INCLUDED IN SEX EDUCATION PROGRAM OR CURRICULUM

… (c) Course materials and instruction that relate to sexual education or sexually transmitted diseases should include all of the following elements:

… (8) An emphasis, in a factual manner and from a public health perspective, that homosexuality is not a lifestyle acceptable to the general public and that homosexual conduct is a criminal offense under the laws of the state.

This is just stupid and wrong on so many levels. Who is this “general public” referring to? Not the American public.  And “homosexual conduct is a criminal offense”? Sure, some of it is (sodomy). But what about two men holding hands? You can read the full text of this small-minded, bigoted law here.

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As reported in The Huffington Post, Patrick Syring, who “apparently” is a former State Department foreign service officer, really, really dislikes Arabs and the Arab American Institute. (He was indicted for threatening the staff at the Arab American Institute.) Here are a few voice-mails and e-mails:

[Voice mail to the Institute:] Hello, I’m Patrick I’m in Arlington VA, and I think James Zogby is worse than Osama bin Laden. Since he supports Hezballah, he’s an anti-Semitic motherfucker, and the only good Arab is a dead Arab.
[Voice mail to an Institute employee:] Hello Valerie, you fucking Arab American shit. James Zogby and you are all Hezballah supporters. The only good Arab is a dead Arab… You God [inaudible] bitch.

[E-mail to two Institute employees; all e-mails sent to work addresses:] Zogby’s anti-Semitic, anti-American statements (and those of the AAI in general) are abhorrent, repulsive and disgusting. The only good Lebanese is a dead Lebanese (as the IDF knows and is carrying out in its security operations, God bless them.) Fuck the Arabs and Fuck James Zogby and his wicked Hizbollah brothers. They will burn in hellfire on this earth and in the hereafter.

Oh, and there’s plenty more here.

 (He was convicted and sentenced to a year in prison.)