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Man Who Has Seen Too Many Movies Clings To Roof Of Car As It Is Being Stolen

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Beginning at the beginning – it’s a hunk of metal, plastic and glass.It can be replaced. A brain splattered all over the pavement can’t. From The Orlando Sentinel:

Val Jacques was playing chess at a Christian community center on Central Boulevard in Orlando on Friday afternoon, police say, when he saw a man climb into his sport utility vehicle. He’d left the keys in the ignition.

Jacques tried to open the door to the Mazda SUV, but the man locked it. Police say Jacques climbed on the roof, and the thief hit the gas.

So the dude goes from playing chess to would-be stuntman like that [The Juice just snapped his fingers.]

Minutes later, police say the thief, later identified as Mazzard McMillian, blew through a red light at the intersection of Central Boulevard and Orange Blossom Trail, smashing into a pickup truck and sending Jacques flying.

Had Mr. McMillian seen more movies or tv, he would have simply slammed on the brakes. And to all of you “reading” advocates, you can’t get that stuff in books … As luck would have it:

An Orlando officer who happened to be stopped at the intersection saw the crash, noting in his report that he saw Jacques “in the air and it appeared he was thrown” from the Mazda.

When the officer approached to check on Jacques – who’d travelled about 100 feet from the SUV, he said – McMillian got out of the Mazda and took off.

100 feet? More like “launched” than “thrown.” So was McMillian caught? He was. And if Mr. McMillian was hurt (likely), he was at least in good enough condition to tell the police what happened. To read more, click here.

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