Legal Juice

A good friend sent this to me. Hopefully it hasn't been around the world too many times, without finding it's way into my inbox. Anyway, there's a town in Austria called "Fucking." Seems people keep stealing the signs. Go figure. Enjoy the article!

While reviewing some doctor disciplinary cases, I came across this incredible story. In 1976, Illinois pharmacist Gerald Barnbaum had his license revoked for Medicaid fraud. He moved to California, and legally changed his name to Gerald Barnes, a prominent doctor whose name he found in a medical directory. Then he wrote the California Medical Board and got a copy of the real Dr. Barnes' medical license, and wrote his medical school and got a copy of his medical school diploma.

For the next 20 years, he was Dr. Gerald Barnes, despite getting caught many times. (Per the San Francisco Chronicle, "he was sent to prison five times, convicted of illegally practicing medicine, mail fraud, grand theft, even involuntary manslaughter, but each time after being paroled, he resumed his sham.")

So where is Dr. Barnes now? He's in prison in Illinois, where he'll probably remain for the rest of his life. To read more about this incredible con, click here.

This will blow your mind. Alan Hogg, age 34, was convicted of drunk-driving - for the 13th time. He's also had 34 convictions for driving while disqualified. You may have guessed that this didn't happened in the United States. Dude would have been executed, at least. Mr. Hogg resides in New Zealand.

Surely the Judge wouldn't give Hogg another chance? Especially since he was also just convicted of possession of meth and three counts of possession of drug utensils? Wrong! The dude WALKED. No jail time (just 200 hours of community service). I'm not going to get into the mitigating factors because WHO CARES! Said the Judge: "In the long term, surely the courts must be in the business of avoiding offending." What about doling out some justice? Protecting innocent citizens? Beware, Kiwis - Hogg has now obtained a learner's permit.

Dr. Nilon Tallant was incredibly thrilled to be honored as the Texas "Doctor of the Day" on January 12, 2007. He correctly assumed that the Texas House of Representatives did not know that he is a CONVICTED SEX OFFENDER who had his license revoked (by the Texas Medical Board!) for 4 years. Said Lt. Gutierrez, who investigated Dr. Tallant's crime, and described him as extremely exploitative and abusive:

I can’t believe that the Medical Board let him practice again. Why didn’t they talk to us before making that decision?

And what was his crime? Dr. Tallant, then 64, was charged with 19 counts of sexual performance with a child, a 17-year-old PATIENT. He pleaded guilty to a felony and got probation. PROBATION!

Representative Leo Berman, who introduced Dr. Tallant, was not pleased.

I don't like the idea that I introduced a sex offender. He should have told whoever selected him to be the Doctor of the Day that he is a registered sex offender and not try to appear before the Texas House of Representatives and make himself look legitimate before the entire state.

Are you shitting me? You expect a doctor who sexually molested a minor patient to just out himself?

And guess what the TV station investigating the matter discovered: The Texas Legislature honored Dr. Tallant on April 21, 2006! To read the entire story, click here.

Guantanamo has nothing on Send Prison in Surrey, England. Maybe these prisoners have legal rights. Maybe they were actually charged with crimes (and convicted too!). And maybe people actually know they are behind bars, but, brace yourself, this prison bans sex toys! One female prisoner, who desperately wants her Rampant Rabbit vibrator (she claims she's a "sex addict"), refuses to accept the status quo. She claims the policy discriminates against heterosexuals. Here's what she said in a letter to the prison governor:

Homosexual acts of every kind are carried out blatantly yet are disregarded by officers. It is openly condoned. If the Prison Service has a duty of care, how come any request for sex-related essentials such as a harmless dildo for stimulation has been termed ridiculous?

Now this may sound a little crazy, but you have to consider that 200 junkies who were not allowed to take heroin in jail were recently awarded £749,000 ($1.5 million U.S.)! Click here to read more.

If he wanted to kill himself before, just imagine how he must feel now. Joe Clapper of Lincoln, Nebraska shot himself in the head, with his girlfriend in the room. He must have wanted to send her some kind of message, doing it with her right there in the room. Well he did, with a bullet. When Mr. Clapper shot himself in the head, the bullet ricocheted off his skull and hit his girlfriend in the chest!

Mr. Clapper pleaded guilty to assault, and was sentenced to one year in jail. The Judge also ordered him to pay $18,862.72 in restitution for his girlfriend's medical bills. Clapper's lawyer argued that, because of a 2000 U.S. Supreme Court case, the amount of the award had to be submitted to a jury and proved beyond a reasonable doubt.

Clapper won! at the appellate level. The Nebraska Supreme court said otherwise, ruling 6-1 that a criminal defendant has no right to a jury trial on the amount of restitution. You can read the entire article here.

That's exactly what Lem and Julia Redd of Provo, Utah did. Seems good 'ole Perry Myers just wasn't exactly the fella they had in mind for their daughter, Julianna. So, the day before her wedding, they told her they were going shopping (for religious undergarments for the ceremony), but kept right on going to Colorado! Julianna claims that, at a rural gas station, they used force to get her back in the minivan. WHAT WERE THEY THINKING? We'll never come home? Well, they came home the next day. The wedding took place a few days later. (The couple has since had a child.)

As you might expect, the parents were charged with kidnapping. Do you think Julianna forgave them, after they apologized on national TV? No way. Here are a few of her comments:

We have to protect our new baby. I don't trust my mom.

I'm past forgiveness. I can't do anything more. They'll have to (show) accountability.

[This case] clarifies to society that you can't do this because you're a parent and you want to. You're accountable, no matter who you are.

And what do the relatives have to say?

Lem Redd, Bride's Father: "We have made an apology and said that what we did was incorrect, but we feel this is definitely wrong." Dude, you kidnapped your 21-year-old daughter. You expected a $50 fine?

Julia Redd, Bride's Mother: "We don't carry any animosity for her, we don't have any animosity towards Perry or his family. We don't know them or him, we were hoping to get to know him better." You don't know him? And you still did this? And let me get this straight: You, the kidnapper, don't "have any animosity towards Perry?" Okay, my head stopped spinning. Go with an "insanity" plea.

Although the Redds are clearly ready to forgive themselves, the groom's family is not of the same mind.

[Read on to see what happened to the Redds.]

Continue reading "Not Happy With Your Daughter's Choice For A Husband? Kidnap Her!" »

A mom in Lincoln, Nebraska went a bit too far. She drove her 12-year-old and 6 other kids (3 who are 12,and 3 who are 13) to a 7th grade English teacher's house, which they proceeded to TRASH as follows:

Using toilet paper, syrup, adhesive tape, dishwashing soap and eggs, they vandalized her house, yard, trees and driveway.

Wow. Must have stopped at the grocery store on the way. For her troubles, mom was cited for suspicion of contributing to the delinquency of minors. To read more, click here.

Why was Martin Rodrigues, age 37, held in jail? Because he asked a young girl to walk on his jacket and leave her footprints on it. The alleged crime? Inciting a child to engage in sexual activity. The problem? The Judge said what Rodrigues had done was not "sexual activity" under the Sexual Offences Act (doh!), so he tossed the case.

However, pursuant to a prior court order, Rodrigues may not take pictures of girls feet. Seems he was pestering children while attempting to photograph their feet in a local park. Perhaps some counseling might be in order? You can read more here.

/>Not by a long shot. First of all, Raymundo Flores was charging $5 and $10 for his merchandise. Actually the price is probably about right - FOR POT! Mr. Flores, an illegal immigrant from Mexico, was charged with selling $5 and $10 bags of marijuana to 3rd, 4th and 5th graders in Mission, Texas. Said police chief Leo Longoria, "It's a scary thought, but that's the info we received." Probably pretty good info too, since bags of marijuana were found in the truck with the ice cream.

They're at it again. The same Chinese company that was selling land on the moon was trying to sell "World Cup Air." The court nixed it.

Why else would the Honorable Gregory Todd (Montana Thirteenth Judicial District, Yellowstone County) issue a Sentencing Memorandum incorporating dozens of Beatles song titles? To read this silly thang in its entirety, click here.

Yes, that includes high-fives, handshakes, a pat on the back, and hugging (no matter how brief). Them's the rules at Kilmer Middle School in Vienna (Fairfax County) Virginia. Per Principal Deborah Hernandez of the zero tolerance policy for physical contact: "You get into shades of gray. The kids say, 'If he can high-five, then I can do this.' " Please, Ms. Hernandez. That's a cop-out, and you know it. It's just easier to say "no physical contact" than it is to draft a reasonable rule.

To read more about this silly rule, and the silly justifications, click here.

Crazy as it sounds, that's exactly what Ontario Judge Marvin Catzman did almost 15 years ago. At the bail hearing for Guy Paul Morin, who had been convicted of first degree murder, Catzman said "I would have to be mad if I didn't see something wrong with this case." So he followed his instincts, and let Morin out on bail pending his appeal. His instincts were right. Two years later, DNA evidence cleared Morin.

Of the decision to let him out on bail, said Morin yesterday, "For the first time, there was a spark of hope. I thank him to this day."

Sadly, not many judges would have the guts to make that call. Judge Catzman died on June 14, 2007.

The Japanese authorities REALLY screwed this one up. Suspecting vote-buying in the small Japanese town of Shibushi, they launched a major investigation. The results: 13 arrests of men and women in their 50s, 60s and 70s. Six of them confessed to buying votes with liquor, cash and parties. Now there was just one problem - a judge concluded that their confessions WERE FABRICATED , and that the defendants “made confessions in despair while going through marathon questioning.” He acquitted all of them on all of the charges. But this came to late for one man, who died during the trial. Another man tried to kill himself by jumping into a river (after being rescued, he confessed!) It's incredible what these people went through before the house of cards collapsed. One man spent 395 days in jail. His wife was jailed for 273 days. The village postmaster was held in a windowless cell for 186 days. Her daughter had to quit her job to tend to the post office!
So what happened to the police in Shibushi who were responsible for this injustice? Zippy. Squawdoosh. Nada.

In a recent case from Australia, two 20-year-old men, Robert Karaca and Jarred Royce Price, were charged with attempted murder. Their “victim” was a 32-year-old friend of theirs named Bruce Levin, who was intent on killing himself, and convinced them to help.

Levin spoke of overdosing on sleeping tablets. If that failed, he wanted to be hit on the back of the head with a steel bar. Oh, and he threw in more than $5,000. (That’d be a little less than $5,000 U.S., but, still, nothing that a couple of broke 20-year-olds would scoff at.)

When Levin’s sleeping pills appeared not to work, Karaca couldn’t bring himself to hit Levin with the pole, so Price was asked to do it. Apparently, Levin thanked them profusely before he was hit and then suddenly had a change of heart – after he was hit twice, he laid still and played dead to avoid being hit again.

Thinking Levin was dead, his pals took off. A bloodied Levin got his wounds stitched at the hospital. A remorseful Karaca told the police what they had done.

So, what happened to them?

Continue reading "If The Sleeping Pills Don't Kill Me, Please Hit Me On The Head With A Pole - And Here's $5k For Your Troubles" »

If you like to wear your pants on the low side, you might want to bypass Delcambre, Louisiana. The town council just approved an ordinance that will outlaw pants that reveal undergarments or certain parts of the body (I'm guessing one of them is two words, with the second one being "crack."). And what does the Mayor think of this ordinance, which will punish offenders with up to 6 months in jail and a $500 fine? She's going to sign it into law. Said Mayor Carol Broussard:

It's gotten way out of hand out here ... Just wear it properly. Cover your vital parts. I mean, if you expose your private parts, you'll get a fine. If you walk up and your pants drop, you get a fine. They're better off taking the pants off and just wearing a dress.

Fine, fine, fine. We get the idea!

If you don't, or you missed it, click here to read it. At the time of the post, his fate had not been determined. So did he graduate with his class? Per his grandmother, here's what happened:

He decided to forego the school board expulsion hearing scheduled last week along with the opportunity to walk across a stage to receive his diploma with his classmates. Thus, he has no expulsion on his school record, he finished out his final high school semester with a 3.4 grade point average, made the county all-star lacrosse team, has his diploma in hand and is headed to Drexel University in Philadelphia this September — in spite of the school administration’s relentless attempt, all the way to the Florida Court of Appeals, to throw him out of school.

Here's the link to her post.

and a blogger from The Washington Post is covering it! To read the blow-by-blow, click here.(Scroll down to get to the beginning of the trial.) (If you need the backstory on this wacky case, you can get it here.)

It's obvious that some people, like Principal Ethna Haines, get carried away with their power. Fortunately, the legislative branch is their to keep them in check. The Havant Borough Council has totally BUSTED this crazed megalomaniac - for painting her school to yellow! Before taking this bold stance against colorfulness, people used to ask of the Council, "Haven't they got anything better to do?" Now we know that they do. This!

Of her outrageous decision to paint a school for 2-9 year-olds yellow, Ms. Haines said: "Other parts of our building are already painted yellow and we use the colour to make the school a bright, positive experience for small children." Said the contractor who defiled the school: "I think the colour really brightens the whole place up and the children love it."

Thank goodness for the voice of reason, the Council. Per Council officer Sarah Hain: "The bright yellow colour for the walls seriously detracts from the character and appearance of the conservation area and adversely affects the outlook of neighbouring occupiers." Mercy! By a vote of 7-5, the Council agreed. Ms. Haines has 4 months to change the color to a dark-stained timber. "Pish," she said. [not really, but she should have.] She did say that she's going to appeal the decision, and has no plans to paint the school a darker color. Here's hoping she wins. To see the school, click here.

Well, well, well. It's SOOOO easy to be for "tort reform" - until you become a victim! Such is the case with former Judge Robert Bork, a vocal "tort reform" proponent. He filed suit against The Yale Club of New York City for "damages ... in excess of $1,000,000" PLUS "Punitive damages ..." So what happened? Bork was giving a speech at the club. Per the complaint (click here to view it), as he approached the dais, there were no stairs (as there normally are). As Bork "attempted to mount the dais" (nice choice of words, there), he fell and was injured.

Now I'll tell you exactly what Bork would say if this happened to someone else: What the hell was the guy thinking, trying to climb the dais without the stairs, the moron? It's his fault for being so stupid. He couldn't have asked for some stairs? People need to accept responsibility for their actions, instead of blaming others! Welcome, Judge Bork, to the ranks of victims of the negligence of others. Perhaps you'll revisit your "tort reform" position?

Do not trifle with Judge Reggie Walton, of the United States Court for the District of Columbia. He will let you have your say. Rest assured, though, that you're going to hear what he has to say too. When 12 of Scooter Libby's pals asked for the court's permission to file a brief supporting Scooter, it was granted, but with this little cherry on top:

It is an impressive show of public service when twelve prominent and distinguished current and former law professors of well-respected schools are able to amass their collective wisdom in the course of only several days to provide their legal expertise to the Court on behalf of a criminal defendant. The Court trusts that this is a reflection of these eminent academics' willingness in the future to step to the plate and provide like assistance in cases involving any of the numerous litigants, both in this Court and throughout the courts of our nation, who lack the financial means to fully and properly articulate the merits of their legal positions even in instances where failure to do so could result in monetary penalties, incarceration, or worse. The Court will certainly not hesitate to call for such assistance from these luminaries, as necessary in the interests of justice and equity, whenever similar questions arise in the cases that come before it.

Kapow! The 12 gents are: Robert Bork, Alan Dershowitz [!] Vikram Amar, Randy Barnett, Viet Dinh, Douglas Kmiec, Gary Lawson, Earl Maltz, Thomas Merrill, Robert Nagel, Richard Parker, and Robert Pushaw.

You can read the order here. Props to The Next Hurrah for this story.

Because then he could blackmail them! Fifty-year-old San Antonio, Texas lawyer Ted Roberts coaxed some serious cashish from an accountant, a lawyer, and two executives who had the pleasure of Mary Roberts' company. Old Ted threatened to tell their wives and employers if they didn't pony up.

And pony up they did, to the tune of $155,000. But it was for a good cause, right Ted? The jury found that, after assuring 2 of the men that he would donate the money to a children's charity, Ted instead used it to help pay for a new house and to fund his law practice. The good news for Ted? The jury acquitted him on 2 of the charges because one of the victims said he didn't care where his money went, and the other said he knew it would be used to repay Ted for his start-up costs (paying the private investigator to get the goods). Surely Ted sees the error of his ways? Nope. Said Ted to the Court:

It is incredible to me after I sought protection from the law that ... I face sentencing without having committed a crime.

Huh? And for good measure, the prosecutor brought in a teacher who claimed Ted said in 2005 that he would represent her for free, if only she'd share "deep, dark," sexual secrets about the city's movers and shakers. Said the prosecutor:

This is who you have before you ... Somebody who wants sexual secrets and then wants to use them against people to blackmail and extort them.

What do you think the judge's sentence was?

Continue reading "Man Okay With His Wife Cheating Because... " »

In the past three years, trains on which Lee Shuang-chuan and his wife Chen Shi Shen-hong rode derailed three times! After the most recent derailment, on March 17, 2006, authorities thought the death of Lee’s wife was a tragic accident. They had been traveling on a train bound for Vietnam to visit Chen’s relatives. Suddenly, the train violently derailed, and Lee became a widower soon after the crash.

It wasn’t long, though before authorities began to uncover the following bizarre series of circumstances surrounding Chen’s death:

The 2 prior derailments!

Lee was a railway worker, and had worked as a railway inspector 2 years ago.

An autopsy of Chen’s body revealed the presence of Eutimine (a strong sedative mainly administered to patients with mental illnesses) and traces of a poisonous substance that was either rat poison or snake venom.

Lee had lost more than NT $33 million (roughly US $1,030,000) in the stock market between 2001 and 2004 (a tidy sum for a railway worker, no?)

Several days before the derailment, Lee took out a NT $20 million (US $625,000) insurance policy on his wife covering “accidental death.”

Lee’s previous wife died under “mysterious circumstances” four years ago. And what did Lee claim was the cause of his previous wife’s death? A snake bite. Do you think he collected on her insurance policy? He did.

Oh, and witnesses saw Lee giving Chen injections after dragging her to a bathroom near the scene of the derailment!

So What Happened to Lee?

Continue reading "You Would Not Want To Be On A Train With This Man!" »

Milwaukee Alderman Michael McGee has been arrested three times in the past 18 months, and has been involved in several other incidents.

He was arrested (that's #1) for shouting an obscenity at Blockbuster employees. In the aftermath of a protest following the Blockbuster incident, he did not contest "a municipal charge of resisting and obstructing an officer."

He was arrested again (that's #2) after threatening to kill Kimley Rucker, a woman with whom he had an affair and who later gave birth to his child. Rucker's attorney claimed McGee threatened her in open court, saying "if you drive by my house, I'm going to kill your ass."

He was investigated for perjury, when, under oath, he denied any "romantic" relationship with Rucker. (remember her!)

Currently, he is under arrest (that's #3) and being investigated on charges of public corruption. According to sources, the arrest was made earlier than planned because investigators suspected the potential for violence.

And that's not all. McGee held drivers licenses in two names: not only "Michael McGee," but also "Michael I. Jackson," a name which he alleged to be his birth name when he petitioned the state to legally change it. He withdrew the petition, but not before the Department of Transportation discovered that McGee had driver's licenses in both names! And his "Jackson" license was revoked in 2000. In June 2006, the state also revoked his "McGee" license!
During the recall campaign, an opponent's campaign manager got a restraining order against McGee because the man (Todd) feared for his life. During a radio broadcast, McGee said that Todd "should be 'hung' for his 'betrayal of the community.'"

Okay, so would you vote for this man in the recall campaign? Do you think he won?

Continue reading "Would You Vote For This Man? Did He Win His Recall Election?" »

So, is she (1) Jaclyn Vivian Meridth, the 38-year-old former furniture-factory worker who paints her nails red and chaperones youth events for her church, or (2) Roberto Rebollera Neria -- aka Jaclyn Meridth, aka Ilma Martinez -- a document forger and suspected illegal immigrant, possibly from Mexico? You'll have to read here to find out. It's quite a story.

Last time it was a doctor, this time a former police officer and school resource officer - allegedly. (Though it shouldn't be too hard to prove!)

David Wayne Coburn has been charged with taking pictures of his genitals and sending them to the cell phones of a 15-year-old girl, and a 19-year-old woman. Oh, and the 19-year-old is the daughter of the police chief, Coburn's former boss. Brilliant! And the 15-year-old is the daughter of one of Coburn's "friends!" And what was Coburn's job this year? He was the D.A.R.E. (Drug Abuse Resistance Education) officer at a middle school! Now he's looking at three felonies for disseminating obscenities. You can read the rest of the article here.

The Juice applauds this church for its openmindedness. But this is what the Juice has a problem with:

While not having a policy for transgendered clergy, the United Methodist Church does prohibit sexually active gay clergy!

Oy vey. What's a parishioner to think, after his/her head stops spinning? For more on this story, click here.

Not only did she claim it, she pleaded guilty to trying to extort $2 million from Starr to keep their alleged relationship years ago a secret! Zoinks!

That's the allegation, anyway. The plaintiffs allege that certain sodas contain unsafe levels of benzene, which can form in drinks containing vitamin C, also called ascorbic acid, and either sodium benzoate or potassium benzoate. (Scientists say factors such as heat or light exposure can trigger a reaction that forms benzene in the beverages.)

So what did the judge do when the soda folks asked him to toss the suit? She declined, and the case moves forward. (Coca Cola settled with the plaintiffs, and agreed to reforumlate the sodas in questions.

Now you all know how I dislike the term "frivolous lawsuit." But prosecutor Karen Richards is knee-deep in frivolity. In Allen County, Indiana, law professor Joel Schumm was ticketed for an "improper taillight." He fought the ticket, arguing that police department guidelines called for a warning. Oh, and the officer who wrote the ticket was on drunken-driving patrol, and was required to write at least one ticket per hour.

So what happened at trial? Schumm lost, and the Judge fined him $100. And he paid the $100? Please. You know he appealed. And what happened on appeal?

Continue reading "The Professor Vs. The Prosecutor" »